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Date: 10/27/2023 6:40:00 AM
From Authorid: 5940
LOL! I love the new “ Brussel sprouts “ flavor sarcasm serum…where were you during Covid? You could have really cleaned up!  |
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Date: 10/27/2023 6:41:00 AM
From Authorid: 5940
The dog scented air freshener has never been seen on tv in my neck of the woods… |
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Date: 10/27/2023 6:44:00 AM
From Authorid: 5940
Maybe business will pick up at the petting zoo, thanks for the free advertisement! Be sure to purchase a can of “ gator-gone” when you buy your ticket! |
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Date: 10/27/2023 6:46:00 AM
From Authorid: 5940
This was my inspiration when I was growing up…… https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Los_Angeles_Alligator_Farm#:~  ext=Originally%20situated%20across%20from%20Lincoln,across%20from%20Knott%27s%20Berry%20Farm. |
Date: 10/27/2023 8:12:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 55251
Hey Larry -- It's interesting that the "Gator-Gone" smells very similar to Kronk's Air Fresheners..  |
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Date: 10/27/2023 8:36:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...I'll obviously have many more replies coming on this post but let me just say for now that it's a pity that we can get the JOTW every Saturday and the suicide booth won't be introduced until 2999. I don't think that I could wait that long.  |
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Date: 10/27/2023 8:43:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...another question...why are you linking me with sarcasm when it is predominantly Hey Larry that is the reigning King of snark around here? I was under the personal belief that I was more akin to Mr. Spock from Star Trek fame and was without humor but deeply steeped in logic. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 8:46:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...and Hey Larry is a lot like Bender of Futurama notoriety. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 8:52:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...also, thanks for reinforcing my efforts to warn innocent bystanders of the perils of the JOTW. These poor people should not be forced to suffer gastrointestinal distress and projectile vomiting. USM should include one of those pop-up warnings on the JOTW where you have to click on the PROCEED button if you're one of those people that prefers masochism as a way of life. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 8:55:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...I'd stick my head in the oven on Saturdays but we have an electric unit and it's just not the same. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 9:02:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...I went to Hey Larry's Gator Petting Zoo back in 2019, right at the start of the Covid outbreak and got me a can of Hey Larry's Patented Garlic Breath Covid Neutralizer. Unfortunately, I tested this out on the alligators and they all succumbed to it's effects so I knew it would work with Covid. Fine product, lousy gator zoo. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 9:05:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...I think I may know some people that have already purchased some of that Kronk air freshener stuff and spray it on their car seats. I truly enjoy sitting in a car with fresh clothing on and having this wonderful aroma attach itself to me so I can feel like my faithful pal is with me at all times. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 9:10:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...you never suggested that a garland of garlic cloves be worn when perusing the JOTW. I don't know if it would help any but, as a child we were told that an ounce of prevention was worth a pound of cure and also that Americans would promote and use horse paste as a cure-all. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 9:12:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...asking for Hey Larry...does the "Sarcasm Serum" come in a suppository? |
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Date: 10/27/2023 9:20:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...I rate this post at 7 out of 10 chamelions or, for the American readers; 3 squirrels and a possum. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 9:23:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...THERE! You now have sixteen replies and have become something of a thorn in Hey Larry's side. You have done a Godly thing here today. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 9:34:00 AM
From Authorid: 5940
I hear some one boo- hooing in the halls of USM! |
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Date: 10/27/2023 10:00:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 55251
As always, thank you for your contributions Hekler! I heard a rumour that you are still upset with Hey Larry after you visited his Gator Petting Zoo. Apparently a case of mistaken identity, and your family returned home with one of the gators thinking the gator was you -- which left you stuck overnight in the gator enclosure at the zoo. I hope the legal proceedings conclude in the near future and Hey Larry pays you a nice cash settlement. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 10:07:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...Morphix...we settled that case and adopted the alligator. I guess our chihuahua didn't like the 'gator because it seems to have run away from home. We named the new addition to the family "Juan", as in "Juan us to get another chihuahua to keep you company?" |
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Date: 10/27/2023 10:10:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...there, there Hey Larry. Now, now. You can't always be the star of the show and you have to learn how to share. Be a good lad now and stop holding your breath or you'll keep that look forever. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 10:10:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
..,.Oh. You weren't holding your breath. My mistake. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 5:31:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
As far as Hekler being akin to Spock, I would have chose his character to be more like “ Ricky “ from Trailer Park Boys. Yeah, he’s steeped in something… |
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Date: 10/27/2023 5:35:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
Bender from Futurama? I slap Hekler in the face as his is the epitome of “Dr.Smith” on the classic show “ Lost In Space. “ The always complaining, sniveling, whiny character that that robot was always warning the the other cast members a bout… |
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Date: 10/27/2023 5:35:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
Bender from Futurama? I slap Hekler in the face as his is the epitome of “Dr.Smith” on the classic show “ Lost In Space. “ The always complaining, sniveling, whiny character that that robot was always warning the the other cast members a bout… |
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Date: 10/27/2023 5:35:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
Bender from Futurama? I slap Hekler in the face as his is the epitome of “Dr.Smith” on the classic show “ Lost In Space. “ The always complaining, sniveling, whiny character that that robot was always warning the the other cast members a bout… |
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Date: 10/27/2023 5:38:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
Hekler “ claims” that he’d stick his head into an oven…need I say more? Majority of sane people wouldn’t stick their heads into a lion’s mouth..l |
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Date: 10/27/2023 5:43:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
Once again, Hekler claims that he went to my petting zoo in 2019. Was he wearing a mask? We’re the critters at the petting zoo wearing masks? I am concerned that Hekler wears bronze makeup. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 5:44:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
Why is Hekler concerned about suppositories? Inquiring minds want to know. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 6:34:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...well, I see that Hey Larry has been by to add some drivel. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 6:39:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...he gave me the patented Richard Simmons "Triple Slap" It woke me up and now I'm hungry. |
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Date: 10/27/2023 7:05:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 55251
Hekler, normally I'd recommend you cook something if you're hungry, but right now I'm not sure I'd want you near an oven... Maybe order some take-out? Have some potato and pretend it's Hey Larry. Could make you feel better! |
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Date: 10/28/2023 2:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Well, things are beginning to fall into place. "L.D."---What "things" are you referring to? kronk---That stash of six bottles of "Sarcasm Serum" I found underneath the pigeon coop and the copious amount of cash under your pillow. You've been rolling in carrion, rinsing yourself off in the kiddie pool, and straining the bathwater, haven't you? Oh, and I also found an "IOU" to Hey Larry, for one adult male alligator. "L.D."---Simple enough: The "Sarcasm Serum" belongs to the smart aleck "Short-Faced Tumbler Pigeon" from Wales. That pigeon smarts off to me one more time, and I'm gonna' eat it! kronk---I find that extremely hard to believe. "L.D."---(Wait `till he hears my next explanations.) kronk---What was that? I thought I heard something. "L.D."---I didn't say anything. Do you want to hear the rest? kronk---Yes, please. "L.D."---Morphix gave me the idea about peddling the "dog scented air fresheners" and I had to kill "Hey Larry's" alligator and remove it's "adrenal gland" to mix with fermented bait shrimp. The resulting formula is all the rage in New York City. kronk---Ugh!  |
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Date: 10/28/2023 8:05:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...L.D...I recently found some of those air fresheners in the local dollar store. The box inferred that the product was made in France from humanely discarded chihuahuas and a secret blend of 11 herbs and spices. It was called "Ma l'odor". Thanks for mentioning the bait shrimp. I saw a lot of Asian folks drinking the stuff and wondered if it was their version of horse paste or something. It just goes to show us that every day comes packed with new knowledge. I wonder if it can restore hair? Any volunteers for some blind testing? |
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