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NOW IN BOOK STORES - SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL USMer

  Author:  5301  Category:(USM Events) Created:(8/10/2023 4:47:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (98 times)

 
 
Hello USM!
 
I was reading Kronk's most recent post today and he had made mention of just releasing his new book.
 
Let's all get out there and buy a copy to help him out in his new literary career!
 
 
 
 
 
Kronk (unretouched photo)
(Approved by Kronk)
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Tired of throwing your hard-earned money at Powerball and Mega Millions?
 
Try Canada's Lottery Game:
 
 
One in three chances of winning!
 
 

You can join Unsolved Mysteries and post your own mysteries or
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Show all stories by   Author:  5301 ( Click here )

Halloween is Right around the corner.. .







 
Replies:      
Date: 8/10/2023 5:09:00 PM  From Authorid: 5940    Hey! There’s no Tapeworm in Arkansas, only mosquitoes. Now if you head out to Boggy Creek you may run across Bigfoot….they even made a movie about it.  
Date: 8/10/2023 5:10:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Oh my goodness! I need one thousand dollars, Canadian! Right away, if not sooner!

kronk---What? I don't even have that in American dollars. What's the money for?

"L.D.'---Hekler turned me on to the Canadian, "MOOSE 4 LIFE" lottery! The odds are great and my chances of winning are excellent! Even if I don't win the bull, there's a good chance I'll win money, which I can use to buy a cow or a calf.

kronk---I don't know about that. but it doesn't matter. I have no money.

"L.D."---Well, get some! Rob a bank, get a loan, swindle someone...Do something!

kronk---I know! The mayor's daughter has been after me to sell you to her. She'd probably pay $1000. We could get the money and you could run away and then we'd
move in with my Cousin Keto, for a few weeks.

"L.D."---Let's do it!
  
Date: 8/10/2023 5:11:00 PM  From Authorid: 5940    Tell me more about that Moose 4 Life lottery ticket. Are the odds that the moose gets euthanized for wreaking havoc at one of the local watering holes or are there actual opportunities to win wooden nickels?  
Date: 8/10/2023 5:13:00 PM  From Authorid: 5940    Kronk, L.D., its Hekler…consider the source and don’t forget he resides in a rundown lodge operated by some fellow by the name of Red Green…  
Date: 8/10/2023 5:26:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Hekler "L.D." here: Kronk is headed to the 7-11 to buy a box of 5 cent cigars, to pass out to anybody who buys his book. He was so excited about it, he wet
himself. Looks like, along with notoriety, "Depends" are also in his future. The likeness on the book jacket is actually pretty close, except he only has one eye, eight teeth, and no hair. Oh, I gotta' log off; he's coming back! See ya

kronk---Yo, dog! What'd I miss?

"L.D."---Oh, nothin' I was just pushing your new book!

kronk---You really are "man's best friend."

"L.D."---Sure I am. (as far as you know)



  
Date: 8/10/2023 5:40:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Hey Larry Life is stranger than fiction! kronk and I spent four days at a lodge, owned by a guy named "Red Green!" It wasn't in Canada, though. Where was that
place, anyway?

kronk---You're talking about that "CKE Campground" in "Scratch Ankle, Alabama." We were supposed to stay for a week, but "Red Green" kicked us out because you ate
three of his pet raccoons.

"L.D."---Hey, I figured with a name like "CKE," anything and everything was fair game.

kronk---What does "CKE" stand for, anyway? I forgot.

"L.D."---Kill em', Cook em' & Eat em'

kronk---Ugh!
  
Date: 8/10/2023 5:44:00 PM  From Authorid: 5940    LOL! L.D. has to be aware of imitations and to only accept the real “ Red Green.” No doubt the squirrel population here would be of great interest!  
Date: 8/10/2023 6:23:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...Hey Larry...I was trying to be complimentary when naming an Arkansas
town and the G rating here means that I can't give the true names.

  
Date: 8/10/2023 6:26:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...Kronk...moving in with your cousin Keto sounds like a splendid idea
and if the Mayor ever comes looking for you, he'll have the Green Hornet
to contend with too.

  
Date: 8/10/2023 6:33:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...Hey Larry...I can see by your comment that you're all
snotty about the highly beneficial natures of Canadian moose.

We in Canada are at the forefront of climate change remedies and
use moose to pull our cars, very similar to the Bennett buggies
of a bygone era.

I'll bet that Skoda you customized to look like a Hummer doesn't
even get 4 mpg. Am I right?

  
Date: 8/10/2023 6:37:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...and please don't go casting aspersions about Red Green.
He has enough on his plate being the love child of Nancy
Pelosi and Red Adair. You don't want either of those tough
nuts coming after you.

  
Date: 8/10/2023 6:41:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...L.D...I used to be a police sketch artist and using the excellent
description that you gave and my Identikit, I was able to come up with
a pretty good likeness of what Kronk looks like. I think I nailed it.

  
Date: 8/11/2023 5:19:00 AM  From Authorid: 5940    You never did answer my question. Dip, duck, divert and dodge. You must be a Republican.  
Date: 8/11/2023 8:57:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...I know how to avoid a wrench.

  
Date: 8/12/2023 5:02:00 AM  From Authorid: 21435    Are there republicans in Canada?

kronk---Sure, dog; republicans are everywhere, but they have not been a dominant force in Canadian politics since the Rebellions of 1837.

"L.D."---Sorta like, they haven't made much difference in the U.S.A. since 2020?

kronk---Ugh, huh....
  
Date: 8/12/2023 5:08:00 AM  From Authorid: 21435    Hekler "L.D." here: That is an absolutely perfect likeness of the old boy. I feel an irresistible urge to poke him in the belly.

kronk---Don't touch me.

"L.D."---hehehe...
  
Date: 10/3/2023 5:58:00 AM  From Authorid: 998    If I order a few copies of the book, will you include the narley lookin' Pillsbury Doughboy?   
Date: 10/3/2023 5:30:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Ginger I'm handing out vintage cuban cigars (circa. 1961) with every copy sold.

"L.D."---Hi, Ginger! Only buy the book if you get a 400% credit. The text is written in an obscure version of "Klingon," and all I did was look at one of those cigars, and it disintegrated.

kronk---Ugh! Always a critic.
  

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