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Hey Larry’s JOTW #103

  Author:  5940  Category:(Humor) Created:(10/8/2022 4:24:00 AM)
This post has been Viewed (128 times)

An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?' The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.

In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things: 1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat. 2. The bouncer is a blonde girl. 3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. 4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter. 5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler. Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'

The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'

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Halloween is Right around the corner.. .







 
Replies:      
Date: 10/8/2022 8:30:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...I knew that if I kept the faith that you would eventually come up with something resembling humor!

I would have replied much sooner but was delayed by a quantity of spam messages that were quite similar
to those of a particular failed politician attempting to drum up donations for his "Stay Out of Jail Fund"

A hearty slap on the back to you for your dogged determination in scouring all of those third class sites
purporting to be repositories of mirth. How you found this joke will probably remain a mystery for the ages.

  
Date: 10/8/2022 8:52:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5940    Wow! I am honored that you kept the faith. Probably because In didn’t cost you anything. However you haven’t kept up your car payment and it’s probably been repossessed.

I am not interested in your plans to divert attention from the heinous crimes you have / and are in the process of committing. We al realize your devotion to the False Orange Idol.

As far as sites go, I have stayed away from those internet service providers from The Great White North.
  
Date: 10/8/2022 9:30:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...heinous crime?? I was picking my nose. Get over yourself!

  
Date: 10/8/2022 9:32:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...and as far as staying away from those internet service providers from
The Great White North", you strayed into one by accident and found this week's JOTW?

Perhaps this will not remain a mystery for the ages.

  
Date: 10/8/2022 10:50:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5940    You always did know how to pick a winner!  
Date: 10/8/2022 10:52:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...want a share of the spoils?

  
Date: 10/8/2022 10:53:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5940    Hey, it’s no mystery why you eagerly watch for the JOTW every Saturday. You look forward to first class entertainment.  
Date: 10/8/2022 10:56:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...the only first class entertainment usually going on in the JOTW is watching you
fizzle and crash as you try to pass off one of some comedians discarded trash as a joke.

Again, congratulations for this once-in-a-lifetime hit on levity.

  
Date: 10/8/2022 11:06:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5940    You like me, you really like me! Thank you for your continued fandom and undying devotion to the JOTW.  
Date: 10/8/2022 11:15:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...am I at Diamond level donation status yet?

  
Date: 10/8/2022 11:27:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5940    You’re the only one at that level silly!  
Date: 10/8/2022 11:31:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...I'm aiming for the gold-pressed latinum heights!

  
Date: 10/8/2022 11:37:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5940    You’ll need to speak to The Grand Nagus.  
Date: 10/8/2022 11:38:00 AM  From Authorid: 5301    

...she's out right now. I'll talk to her when she gets back.

  
Date: 10/9/2022 4:19:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Wow! That was a pretty good joke, Hey Larry.

kronk---Yeah; I thought so, too. I wonder what happened to the old leatherneck after he said that?

"L.D."---I imagine the women thanked him for his service, bought him a whiskey, beat him `till he passed out and then tossed him into the pen behind the bar.

kronk---You mean the pen with the ever hungry, drunken, Russian boar hogs?

"L.D."---Yep
  
Date: 10/9/2022 4:25:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Shhhhhh....Quiet.

"L.D."---What's up?

kronk...You don't want "The Grand Nagus" to hear you.

"L.D."---(whispers) That guy makes me nervous. With those ears, he can hear better than I can.

kronk---(whispers) Dig it! How'd you like to have to wash those.

"L.D."---(whispers) Ugh!
  
Date: 10/9/2022 4:27:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5940    I have it on good authority that they were kind to the blind old veteran, they had a drink, a chuckle, and put him on a Greyhound one way to Canada. He had a note pinned to his jacket with explicit instructions not to return until he is able to transport a pallet load of that canned moose.  
Date: 10/9/2022 4:50:00 PM  From Authorid: 5301    

...Kronk...whatever happened to that blind marine was probably
shrugged off as "just another Thursday night at the bar".

You can probably still remember what I'm talking about.

  
Date: 10/10/2022 5:26:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Hekler Yep. Just sprinkle a little more sawdust on the floor, work it in with a stiff bristle brush and sweep everything into the trash. Oh, and always sit close
to the exit, with your back against the wall.
  
Date: 10/10/2022 6:27:00 PM  From Authorid: 5301    

...and you don't mess around with Jim.

  

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