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Date: 6/7/2022 4:09:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
Suspect was last seen hanging out in the front window of a Payless Shoe Store..all 24 year old females are encouraged to stay away from this suspect till further notice.  |
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Date: 6/7/2022 5:33:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...staff at the retirement complex were taken aback when police came looking for Mr. Bundy. At first appearance, it looked like he was soundly asleep in bed but a further inspection showed that he had craftily created a human form under the blankets using old copies of "Big 'Uns" magazines. Bundy, a sufferer of PTSD will not face charges.  |
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Date: 6/7/2022 6:10:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
Podiatry expert Doctor Scholl refused to comment on the case as persons with a foot fetish are not within his realm of practice. |
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Date: 6/7/2022 6:23:00 AM
From Authorid: 21435
Let's put out bait and catch that freak! "L.D."---What's the big deal? The thief hasn't damaged any life form, as far as I can tell. I mean, when I was a puppy, I ripped off footwear, constantly. It's like, when a body starts a serious shoe collection, it's hard to stop. kronk---Yeah, well, I see where you're coming from, but in our "challenged" economy, ripping of somebody's shoe is certainly an unneeded hardship. Have you priced a pair of threads, lately? For example: If someone stole one of mother's shoes, we'd have to find money to buy a new pair. No place sells just one shoe. We'd more than likely have to cut back on your weekly meat ration. "L.D."---Let's get that bum off the streets! We need a "bait" that he couldn't possibly resist. I know! We'll use that pair of shoes that you have in a trunk in the barn. Does shoes were from one of your old girlfriends, weren't they? kronk---I dunno, dog. I've been having those shoes for a long time. They belonged to a Norwegian woman named "Gunda," from Oslo. All the guys called her "The Frost Giant." She wore a size 18-5XX Wide. "L.D."---Whatever happened to her? kronk---She took a job, up in California, wrestling great white sharks, and a 22 footer ate her head. Sigh...That girl sure knew how to pickle a herring. "L.D."---Come on, man! Get serious! Think of all the women walking around with just one shoe. Man up, for Pete's sake! kronk---OK! So, how we gonna' do this? "L.D."---I got it all thought out. We'll send off for a husky size blow up doll, put the shoes on her and set her in an alley off of 6th Avenue, When the guy makes his move, I'll run out and hamstring him, then you can take on of "Gunda's" shoes and beat him on the head until he passes out. kronk---My dog!   |
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Date: 6/7/2022 6:34:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
LMAO^^^^^^. L.D. |
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Date: 6/7/2022 10:16:00 AM
From Authorid: 21435
What does he mean by "Big 'Uns magazine?" kronk---Big feet; it's a magazine that deals exclusively with big feet. "L.D."---I want one. kronk---We'll see. |
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Date: 6/9/2022 6:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
"L.D."---It's possible that we have misread the meaning. kronk---The meaning of what? "L.D."---Well, after reading the title, again, I can't help but wonder. kronk---Wonder, what? "L.D."---How can one tell a male shoe, from a female shoe? kronk---Why do you always hit me with weird stuff like that, when I've just run out of wine and all the "giggle juice" shops are closed? "L.D."---hehehe |
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Date: 6/10/2022 4:52:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
Well, these days you’ll have to ask what the shoe identifies as. |
Date: 6/10/2022 10:27:00 AM
From Authorid: 21435
Hey Larry  Lately, I have been "identifying" as Brad Pitt's character, Achilles, in the movie, Troy."L.D."---HA HA HA....You'd do better "identifying" as the wooden horse. kronk---Ugh! |
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