It's 1am and the shadows come home
Creeping slowly besides me in bed
They whisper sweet miserable things
Planting the seeds to another depressive state
Where memories consume me
Trying to drown me in my tears and emptiness
Eventually they will go on a break
That's when I'll change my clothes
Drop myself off into the world that forgets me
Maybe even crack a smile or two
As soon as I feel happy they come running to remind me
Misery is my only friend
Firmly grabbing my soul and chasing ghosts
Does she think of me?
Does she love me?
Weeks turn to months to years
I see the old echoes of myself
Patiently and foolishly waiting by the door
That she walked out of ages ago
They don't know they are staring at an illusion on the wall
She's never coming home my friend
You will mentally deteriorate
Inside this locked box cleverly disguised as a heart
Why am I still alive?
Someday it feels like the strings should break
They stare at me asking the same
Never wanted the role of disappointment
But it just something I do well
Phone full of familiar names
None ever call
It's okay, I don't want anything to change
No sense in burdening them anyway
Misery forces my face to the mirror
Telling me who to blame
Every single mess that is made
Carries my identity
I don't recognize the man staring back
Drag myself to bed to try and find some sleep
Tired and weak I pick up the phone
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