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Date: 7/6/2021 4:34:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hekler  L.E.D. here: Personally, I'd spare "Lillibeth," for old times sake, but the rest, well, I know of a certain dungeon in downtown New Orleans. "I just want the truth." What? It's my turn on the computer. Can't you just wait your turn? Oh, alright. Ugh!kronk---"The National Enquirer" is beyond reproach. They would never sandbag the American people. Bill Cosby was innocent! He's not really a democrat; he just "knew too much. L.E.D.---Alright! That's enough! Here's your wine bottle. Go back to your closet.  |
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Date: 7/6/2021 5:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 5940
This is ultra Kanye-Cool! Is there anyway that I can get a lifetime subscription? What I’m really anticipating is the Cartrashian answer to Sports Illustrated SwimSuit Edition….everything is plastic and superficial so there’s no need for sun block. If they happen to have any back issues for sale, I’d like a copy of when Rudy Giuliani sold his soul. Crackerjack reporting there my friend!  |
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Date: 7/7/2021 7:42:00 AM
From Authorid: 13969
Kronk and I might know the same dungeon. I approve of this increased sacrificial offering to our sun. Punching through escape velocity with that much dead weight might be a challenge though.  |
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Date: 7/7/2021 1:37:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...Hey L.E.D.! I think that I may also heard of that same dungeon but do you really think it's appropriate to discuss it here on a G-rated site such as USM? If you have control of the computer, don't back down. Kronk can wait for a little while longer for his turn. If he was a decent guy, you would have had your own iPhone by now. Kronk...remember in the movie "Men in Black" where the tabloids were referred to as the "hot sheets"? Yep, journalism at it's apex. Bill Cosby was charged with something??? I remember the old "Fat Albert" show and it's theme song: Hey, hey, hey! Here's Fat Albert And I'm gonna sing a song for you And Bill's gonna show you a thing or two ......... This is Bill Cosby coming out with music and fun If you're not careful, you may learn something before it's done!  |
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Date: 7/7/2021 1:41:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...Hey Larry I always strive to keep my readers happy so you might find a special gift in your email account. I'd post it here but I don't think Kronk's heart could take the excitement. I'll work on part two of your request and perhaps make a special post JUST FOR YOU! Won't that be more fun than a barrel of monkeys? |
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Date: 7/7/2021 1:49:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...Sand Ghost...it's ALWAYS a pleasure to have a lady drop by the "Cranky Old Men's Club". As I mentioned to Kronk's imaginary dog, this is hardly the time or place to discuss that den of iniquity in New Orleans. I think a different approach to achieving escape velocity might be possible if we were to feed flatulence friendly foods to the great bloated one. Hey Larry may be able to weigh in here and offer some suggestions. |
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Date: 7/7/2021 2:15:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Now we're talking! Destination, please?....Four adults and one dog...First class/ non stop/ one way...N`Walins, La. "Let the good times roll!" |
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Date: 7/7/2021 2:47:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...should I pack swimwear or it this a purely business meeting? |
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Date: 7/7/2021 4:33:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hekler Yes, indeed. Bring a suit. There's a ferry that runs from The French Quarter to Algiers Point. But who needs a boat? After a couple of Pat O'Brien's famous Hurricanes, we'll just swim it. It's 200 feet deep, but only three quarters of a mile wide. We'll need a diversion, I think. Inquisitions can become tedious after about fourteen hours. |
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Date: 7/7/2021 5:48:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...I'd better bring my water wings too. Stamina for swimming isn't what it used to be. I would pack the Sea-Doo but I'm not going to pay a fortune in overweight luggage fees. |
Date: 7/7/2021 6:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 13969
Hekler, I'm a sailor disguised as a lady.  If you're going to be in New Orleans, you don't need a suit. Although Kronk and I clearly know the same places I am of the opinion that no one has any business swimming in a swamp. |
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Date: 7/7/2021 7:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hekler I'm just talking trash, bro. These days, I wouldn't jump into the river unless Nancy Pelosi was after me. Come to think of it; I don't think I would have jumped into that river back in "those days," either. Now, Pat O'Briens, that's another story. I've actually been swept out into the curb with the cigarette butts and stale beer. |
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Date: 7/7/2021 7:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Sand Ghost There "was" this place on the waterfront, called "The Warehouse." "A sailor disguised as a lady," eh? Yep, we definitely need to make that trip. Write on... |
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Date: 7/9/2021 10:40:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...Sand Ghost...we could always use a sailor around here too in the event that USM goes on a three hour tour and gets washed up on an uncharted desert isle. You can be the Skipper and teach Larrygan all you know about seafaring. We already have Ginger so we'd need to fill the other roles. Kronk would make a great professor and I have an idea for Mrs. Howl. I've always wanted to be Maryanne so we'd need to name a Mr. Howell. Any recommendations? |
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Date: 7/9/2021 10:42:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...Kronk...I'm sure you would change your mind about Nancy Pelosi once she started whispering sweet nothings into your ear. You've never given that woman half a chance to show you what she's made of. |
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Date: 7/9/2021 4:18:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hekler I didn't really know a thing about Pelosi, until 2020. (Don't tell anyone, but I actually kinda' sorta had the hots for her, and then one day, she opened her mouth.) Hekler L.E.D. here: I volunteer to be Mr. Howl. I could listen out for pirates and cannibalistic south sea islanders and sniff out coconut crabs, too.kronkj---Ugh! He said Mr. "Howell," not Mr. Howl. Good grief! L.E.D.---Yeah, well you ain't no projector, either! kronk---Oh, Lord. |
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Date: 7/10/2021 1:33:00 PM
From Authorid: 998
Yep Yep ... Ginger here (salutes) reporting for duty. There's a lot of muck out there skipper. Easy to get washed up on an uncharted island. Hey, that actually sounds good if the bloated one and his cronies can't find us. I'll help tuck those 'new age' Enquirers in bottles and cork them up, so we can set them out to sea. Don't expect the 'high maintenance Ginger', cus I'm more of the down home Maryanne kind of Ginger ... with a bit of spice, fire and kick tossed in for fun ... LoL  |
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Date: 7/10/2021 1:49:00 PM
From Authorid: 998
My word, what a motley crew we are. Our ring leaders Hey Larry and Heckler will get us through the storm, but we will need an extra keg of the brown liquor for each of us to go with the chuckle-fest going on here. I think the "Cranky Old Men's Club" has broken Kronk. He seems to be talking to himself now, and enjoying it a bit too much ... lol I see ya'll enlisted a Sand Ghost too. 'Shhh whispers' I'd watch her, iffen I were you. She may be a feme-fatal. I've heard from far and wide about her charms and I'll bet they work on "Cranky Old Men". |
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Date: 7/10/2021 1:49:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Ginger Fear not, lady. You'll be safe with us. We won't let the man getcha'. Hekler is a trained antagonist. Hey Larry, trained Hekler. Sand Ghost is a ninja master of disguise and one look at me, will turn even a gorgon, to stone. Oh, one other thing; don't pet that talking dog. He hasn't been vaccinated. |
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Date: 7/14/2021 8:54:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...Hiya Ginger! Thanks for agreeing to come on the "3 hour tour" with us! You won't need to bring any liquor with you...there's a whole keg of it in the hold of the Minnow and so far, Kronk hasn't been able to make a radio out of it. At least that's what he says he's doing. Yep, Sand Ghost is showing up a little more often these days but you don't have to worry about her using her femme fatale charms on us. We're so old we fall asleep just looking at a hula-hoop these days. |
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Date: 7/14/2021 9:01:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5301
...Kronk...Hey Larry really didn't train me. I just got to be all antagonistic just by reading his "Joke of the Week" which is really his way of passing secret messages to his Russian handler. Your first clue should have been the fact that the jokes aren't funny unless you've been in a coma for the last fifty years and anything would seem funny after that. Sand Ghost DOES have a ninja aura. I should have noticed that myself. I might also suggest that you go for an eye exam. That isn't a talking dog. It's an alligator. |
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Date: 7/15/2021 2:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hekler Dark rum is an excellent conductor of radio waves. I've about got the device perfected. I will, however, need another 55 gallon barrel of rum to finish the job. Not only is that talking alligator cold blooded; it's also a lush. |
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Date: 4/13/2024 12:40:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
2021 seems like a hundred years ago.... "L.D."---Where have you been? kronk---Chicago "L.D."---Oh.. |
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