Go to Unsolved Mystery Publications Main Index Go to Free account page
Go to frequently asked mystery questions Go to Unsolved Mystery Publications Main Index
Welcome: to Unsolved Mysteries 1 2 3
 
 New Mystery StoryNew Unsolved Mystery UserLogon to Unsolved MysteriesRead Random Mystery StoryChat on Unsolved MysteriesMystery Coffee housePsychic Advice on Unsolved MysteriesGeneral Mysterious AdviceSerious Mysterious AdviceReplies Wanted on these mystery stories
 




Show Stories by
Newest
Recently Updated
Wanting Replies
Recently Replied to
Discussions&Questions
Site Suggestions
Highest Rated
Most Rated
General Advice

Ancient Beliefs
Angels, God, Spiritual
Animals&Pets
Comedy
Conspiracy Theories
Debates
Dreams
Dream Interpretation
Embarrassing Moments
Entertainment
ESP
General Interest
Ghosts/Apparitions
Hauntings
History
Horror
Household tips
Human Interest
Humor / Jokes
In Recognition of
Lost Friends/Family
Missing Persons
Music
Mysterious Happenings
Mysterious Sounds
Near Death Experience
Ouija Mysteries
Out of Body Experience
Party Line
Philosophy
Poetry
Prayers
Predictions
Psychic Advice
Quotes
Religious / Religions
Reviews
Riddles
Science
Sci-fi
Serious Advice
Strictly Fiction
Unsolved Crimes
UFOs
Urban Legends
USM Events and People
USM Games
In Memory of
Self Help
Search Stories:


Stories By AuthorId:


Google
Web Site   

Bookmark and Share



...HOW DO I SIGN ON ???

  Author:  5301  Category:(News) Created:(12/3/2020 5:32:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (492 times)

 
 
 
 
After seeing some of the people that gave testimony at the Michigan Legislative Committee hearing yesterday, I felt that I could do a MUCH better
job of coming up with a convincing or similarly outlandish bit of "proof of voter fraud" fairy tale.
 
Team Trump's "Team Kraken" released their own team of Krakpots free yesterday to submit irrefutable evidence of political shenanigans in the recent election that saw
incumbent President and all-around peoples' favorite Donald J. Trump's campaign go down with more flames than the Hindenburg did in 1937.
 
Allowing residents of local sanitoria out on a day pass to relate tales of wonder and deviousness may not have been the best strategy on the part of Mr. Giuliani and his
thoroughly and equally brainwashed colleagues in their failing attempt to create a shambles of electoral process.
 
All I want to know is: Where do I sign up?
 
If you're looking for bizarre tales or a handy scapegoat or two, I'm the guy that can come up with a pretty convincing story.
 
The time machine guy from the future that travelled here to stop Trump's great-great grandson Donald McFly from creating a black hole in his basement lab that destroyed the Earth.
 
That's just a sample. I don't want to put any of my really good ideas out there because I'm sure that Giuliani would steal them and refuse to even credit me or pay me royalties.
 
So, Team Kraken... want to hire a QUALITY  liar to lead you into victory?
 
I'm here most nights. Just PM me and I'll listen to your offers.
 
 
(You won't even have to get me drunk first. )
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

You can join Unsolved Mysteries and post your own mysteries or
interesting stories for the world to read and respond to Click here

Scroll all the way down to read replies.

Show all stories by   Author:  5301 ( Click here )

Halloween is Right around the corner.. .







 
Replies:      
Date: 12/3/2020 5:48:00 PM  From Authorid: 5940    What are your qualifications? Do you have references and a PowerPoint presentation to enthrall me into hiring you? I’m not going to settle on just any door to door sales pitch ya know.  
Date: 12/3/2020 5:51:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...here's another freebie for you Rudy.
Hire a whole slew of Elvis impersonators and have them gyrating on stage while your witlesses speak.
No one will be looking at anything other than the Elvis infestation. Steal the Committee's paperwork
and replace it with your own craftily concocted "proof". I don't understand the sudden surge of goodwill
that has come over me.

  
Date: 12/3/2020 5:55:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...Hey Larry...I can create one humdinger of a pie chart and the Powerpoint show will make folks want to get out and do something.
I also give 1 Air Mile for every $20 spent on my fee.
  
Date: 12/3/2020 6:00:00 PM  From Authorid: 5940    That’s not even close to the grift that Trump is doing currently. He’s asking for donations to fight the voter fraud and raking in quite a bit of coin. Problem is, he’s lost the election and the money is going elsewhere.  
Date: 12/3/2020 6:05:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...well, he won't get much use out of it when they send him to Bar~a~Lago.

  
Date: 12/3/2020 6:14:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...also, If he gets 1 air mile for every $20 spent on fees, he should be able to
fly anywhere in the world that doesn't have an extradition treaty with the U.S.
There's probably enough Air Miles left over to bring the kiddies along too.

  
Date: 12/3/2020 7:03:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Hekler There was a time when I could have hooked you up with the "right" people. Alas, these days, I am pretty much an outcast, doomed to wander aimlessly from overpass to overpass, collecting cow patties. (Hey, it's a living; sorta.)

These days, liars are .0007 cents per dozen. I believe nothing that I hear and discount eighty nine percent of what I see. I wouldn't be surprised if it started raining, non stop and the rattlesnakes beat it for high ground....shalom
  
Date: 12/3/2020 8:27:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...Kronk... I agree with you on your estimation of liars having a value of .0007 cents per dozen but what do you think a professional prevaricator might be worth?

Being the super nice guy that I am, here's a little advice from another Canadian legend in the form of a song. It'll help you out with you cow patty finances.

Here ya go: https://youtu.be/UgdEJnsdOOU?t=12

  
Date: 12/4/2020 3:51:00 PM  From Authorid: 21435    Hekler Food for thought, indeed. You just never know what will set the average human off, these days. I mean, look what "they" did to "Ananias." That being said, I'm sure there is still a demand for people like "us," but we'll probably need to change our hair color and flee to "the land of high mountains." ....bonjou  
Date: 12/10/2020 7:16:00 AM  From Authorid: 67775    the great part of America is we can disagree and not give the same opinions on matters as everything is viewed through point of view of their own. I think its worth investigating every report of fraud or rigging to clear the slate, no matter the outcome, its good for our Constitutional Republic
Date: 12/10/2020 4:26:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 5301    

...of course these things should be looked into when there is PROOF of wrongdoing.
If I were to report a fire without seeing smoke, I'd likely be fined or jailed.

Same goes for calling 911 and reporting a flood when I haven't seen any water.
Sure, I may have a suspicion of a fire or a flood SOMEWHERE but that doesn't
necessarily mean that they're really there.

All I've seen come forward to date are paid actors, drunk zealots, folks looking
for their 15 minutes in the limelight and washed up lawyers looking for attention.

Behind it all is a child having a tantrum and asking for people to donate to his
"screw up the country more" war chest. Have you made a donation yet?

You should donate the money to a good women's shelter instead. At least some good
will come out of it and you could be proud of the help you have given.

Good to see you back again!

  

Find great Easter stories on Angels Feather
Information Privacy policy and Copyrights

Renasoft is the proud sponsor of the Unsolved Mystery Publications website.
See: www.rensoft.com Personal Site server, Power to build Personal Web Sites and Personal Web Pages
All stories are copyright protected and may not be reproduced in any form, except by specific written authorization

Pages:972 649 772 447 792 1545 618 102 1437 1170 659 433 1089 684 714 75 1540 4 1133 882 1325 830 115 1556 440 469 1037 1268 673 464 976 485 1523 1212 436 593 1331 194 674 724 399 200 1423 1382 1321 351 615 463 104 329 912 886 92 194 627 1014 696 617 1047 1480 915 303 1363 1215 62 211 392 266 489 185 303 1430 1112 778 1140 1070 936 674 551 1147 1380 915 307 841 1003 1525 435 1379 227 139