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Date: 12/2/2020 2:50:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
C’mon people, I want you to speak your mind. I know you’re out there. And if you a roll I can hook you up.  |
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Date: 12/2/2020 8:37:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...as humans go, we're not too smart and could learn a few tricks from our pets. My aunt and uncle kept Beagles and they never needed toilet tissue. Why bother when you could just drag your posterior across the living room carpet?  |
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Date: 12/2/2020 8:43:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
What about "rug burns?" Also wouldn't the type of carpet work better than others? Of course if you're well to do Persian rugs are classy. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 11:38:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...try to avoid carpeting made of synthetic materials. It can cause major burns. If you do know where you can use a good quality of Persian rug, go there. The proprietor of the store may not let you back in the door again but there is always another store. Besides, what could you be charged with? Also, if you do find yourself running short on the "essentials", may I suggest taking a trip to a local store with a public washroom. They ALWAYS have partial rolls of that stuff you need and would like you to take it home with you. Go to the stores that charge exorbitant prices for their wares so you won't feel like such a criminal if you're one of those types with (ahem) morals. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 11:47:00 AM
From Authorid: 5301
...ATTENTION HOMELAND SECURITY...Hey Larry is running a black market T.P. ring! You should get in there NOW and flush out his gang and wipe out this type of corruption! ...wow! I'm on a roll! |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:12:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
Thanks for those helpful hints. I guess it’s true what they say about those with experience. However, laws where you live are perhaps a tad more lenient. After all,it’s not like taking a car out for a test drive. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:16:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
As far as those places with a public restroom goes, they’ve got wiser since the first outbreak. Much like banks do to keep one from taking a pen off the counter after endorsing a check, they have resorted to chaining down the partials and keeping the regular stock under lock and key. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:18:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
And calling Homeland Security about my business endeavors will do no good. It’s a Trump enterprise and he gets a cut in exchange for a pardon. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...Hey Larry...you live in the land of the NRA. Can't you just pull out your gat and shoot out those locks and chains? Hint...just tell the people rushing to the washroom that you are currently experiencing explosive flatulence. That's why you're taking all the T.P. It got caught in the circle of destruction and you're taking it out to bury it like any good citizen might do. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:32:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...Trump Enterprises? Aren't they the manufacturers of Donald's Best® brand of T.P.? Sure, it may look like it's a good buy but word on the grapevine says that it's already full of it. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:52:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
So, you want Americans to get a hunting license to shoot a roll of toilet paper that’s secured down? What’s the Canadian version of the NRA? |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:55:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
Full of it? Most likely. But when then dust settles and after the circus tents come down, I get a pardon while the Ring Master leaves town with all the revenue. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 5:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...we haven't got anything like the NRA in Canada because if we were allowed to have guns we'd likely shoot our eye out. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 6:02:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...I wonder if I should send him the fifty bucks and request a preemptive pardon too? You never know...one of these days I might want to go to Disney World when I'm all possessed by dementia. Never hurts to be prepared. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 6:04:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
Yeah, and by then his grandchildren will be on hand to give you a personal tour of Never-Never Land. |
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Date: 12/2/2020 6:17:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...I wonder if the grandchildren will be robots like the parents are? |
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Date: 12/2/2020 6:22:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...and, I don't need to worry about Doomsday. I was never one to be picked out for a team so when everyone else is gone, I'll still be here with only animals and trees to annoy. At least trees like me. Well, they like me until the point where I've drank too much beer. Then they don't like me as much. |
Date: 12/3/2020 6:45:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hey Larry  Hangin' in there, brother. I keep stressing to my wife that we should stock up on everything. Put it under the bed, in the corner, up in the attic; dig a hole out in the yard. If we don't need the stuff, we can give it away.Any disruption in the food distribution and we'll be out in the neutral zone, trying to chew grass. I mean, it's not like a body can mosey on down to the corner and off an elephant, to feed the neighborhood. Personally, I'm stocking up on 7.62 X 51 ammunition. I'm up to 32,642 rounds, (just short of armory status) which would really be cool, except that I'm going blind in my dominant eye and "the talking dog" can't stand the sound of gunfire. Hang in there, man; things are bound to get better. Lach pa la potota  |
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Date: 12/3/2020 8:51:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...Kronk...I know where you're at with the vision thing. Have you considered swapping out your current armory for something that sprays 700 rounds per minute. Just point it in a general direction and let go. You're bound to hit something. |
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Date: 12/4/2020 11:41:00 AM
From Authorid: 10722
By my throne I keep a stack that goes to the ceiling, and these are the six per pack packages. Good enough to last the out of stock times, but not enough to make a TP fort.  |
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Date: 12/4/2020 4:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hekler Spooky, aka "Puff the Magic Dragon" had a basic load of 24,000 rounds of 7.62 and could run `em to the tune of 50 to 300 rds per second. Let's see, at 50 rds per second, we're looking at eight minutes and then it was "head for the house." I wish my ancestors would have invested heavily in "Joliet Ammunition." I wouldn't be picking cow patties, today. Stay safe. |
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Date: 12/4/2020 4:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...Anomaly X...do you ever play bowling while you're "takin' care of business"? It just seems like something I'd try. |
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Date: 12/4/2020 4:29:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
Kronk...at 50 rounds per second, there wouldn't be much left to put on the table unless you are fond of salad. |
Date: 12/5/2020 2:26:00 PM
From Authorid: 10722
It's a tiny half bath and lacks the length for bowling, so that time is usually reserved for browsing youtube looking for a soundtrack  |
Date: 12/5/2020 2:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 10722
Wow I guess I'm rusty with the smilies  |
Date: 12/6/2020 11:54:00 AM
From Authorid: 10722
I should also clarify the youtube browsing gets done on the phone, I don't have a desktop in there  though that wouldn't be the worst idea |
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Date: 12/6/2020 2:17:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 5940
You wouldn’t be the first one. Besides, over the years people have used newspapers, books or magazines to occupy their time. |
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Date: 12/6/2020 4:46:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...I just use my "down time" to envision ways to rule the world. Nothing has panned out thus far. |
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Date: 12/6/2020 4:50:00 PM
From Authorid: 5301
...Anomaly X...if you're using your phone in the WC, might I suggest using a lanyard on it? Nothing worse than a telecommunications breakdown due to flooding. |
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