Show White sighed. First her step mother had tried to have her killed, and then trying to escape that huntsman…it’s was not her day.
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Prince Charming glared. Bad enough he’d become a vampire before his wedding, but now this… “You punk, how dare you try and….” “It’s…I didn’t have any choice man! I gotta make a living!” the huntsman sniveled. Prince Charming sighed. It really couldn’t be helped. “Fine, just don’t do it again. Kill something else, and take the heart to the queen.”
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Snow White frowned. It locked one path would take her to a cottage, and another path would take her to a spooky looking castle. “Hello….” A voice said. Gasping, she turned to see her fiancée.
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Sighing, Snow White was at a loss. First her step mother turned her fiancée into a vampire, and then tried to have her killed. And sooner or later, the codger would learn she was alive. “I think she’s jealous….” Prince Charming shrugged. “You are the most beautiful woman in the kingdom." That was when her beloved stood up. “The sun is coming, but take the path to the cottage of the seven dwarves. They’ll give you shelter until we can meet again, after the sun goes down tomorrow.”
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Snow White gagged at the stench. Seven dwarves who were too lazy to clean up after themselves make quite a pungent stench. According to the names engraved on the head boards, Einstein, Sad, Wheezy, Grouchy, Loser, Shy, and Drowsy were the names of the residents. And she didn’t even want to guess what those stains on the outside were.-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Oh him? Yeah, you can stay…” one dwarf nodded, as he let loose a fart that was loud enough to wake the dead. Looking over, a cockroach was on it back, and twitched before going still. For the sake of her sanity, Snow White began to clean the cottage. Looking up. She shuddered, noting the stains on the ceiling.
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Prince Charming knew it was only a matter of time before the Queen learned Snow White was alive. Not to mention he felt irked that she’d be dealing with the filth from the seven dwarves. They’d had that contest just yesterday. He’d make it up to her, when things settled. After all, he still needed to find a way to regain his humanity. Still, for the Queen to walk around during the day, her power was not to be underestimated. But since she had turned him, killing her might restore his humanity. “It won’t be long my beloved…" he said, placing the lid on his own coffin. Closing his eyes, he was soon asleep as the sun came up.
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It was dawn when Snow White was able to get some rest. But at least the cottace no longer smelled of flatulence on burned food. Still, the dwarves were snoring… Shrugging, she made herself a bed by the fire place.
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As the sun can down, Snow White ran and embraced her fiancée. “Sorry dear…” he said. She scoffed. “It was horrible!”
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“Hey, we let her stay with us for free” one dwarf scowled, scratching his butt. He frowned. “Want to retire?” “We don’t work for free. It’s gonna cost ya!” “Kill the vampire, and you will all live in the Royal Disney Casino and Resort for the rest of your lives.” All dwarves stood up, and bowed in respect. “At yer service yer royal highness” the dwarves bowed, having gas in unison. “We are naught but humble dwarves at your service.” Nearby, five ghosts left the area, crying from the stench. “Kill her stepmother. She’s a powerful vampire.” “For a life of happily ever after sire, we shall be happy to do as you ask.”
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Snow White smiled as a she and her beloved took a romantic walk. “I’m just worried. How can she be killed dearest?” “Those dwarves can find a way, if they expect to live in luxury for free” Prince Charming grumbled. “And considering you cleaned that cottage..” “I didn’t have a choice.” “Yes….perhaps I shouldn’t have been so generous.” “It’ll be fine…” “As long as they kill her, the sooner the better.”
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“So a wooden stake thought the heart…or sun.” Loser mused. “Sun is cheaper” Grouchy belched. “Yeah, but we’d need to trap her stupid“ Wheezy retorted. Einstein held up a copy of “How to kill a “Vampire for Dummies”. “I read this least year. I think I have an idea.”
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Landing in a clearing, the Wicked Queen smiled, holding a red apple. “Hmph, I shall kill Snow White…then I shall be the fairest in the land! Too bad it took me a full day to make this thing” she grumbled.
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As her beloved picked wildflowers, she noticed a red apple nearby. “Hm…” “It’s poisoned!” Prince Charming yelled. “D’oh!" Snow White frowned, feeling like an idiot. That was when her beloved, handed her some wildflowers. “Until tomorrow night my dearest” he said, as they kissed.
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Nearby, the Queen opened the front door to a cottage. The last thing she saw was a piece of wood with a pointed end being pushed right to her.
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In a burst of light, the prince regained his humanity as the sun came up.
Epilogue-
True to his word, the dwarves lived a very happy life in the Disney Casino and Hotel, with all expenses paid. Snow White and the Prince were married, and they lived happily ever after.
The End
