Good morning USM!
Go to bed.
We all do it.
Every night for all these years we've been stomping around on this planet.
That stomping finally wears you out and you get tired so off to the sack you go.
It used to feel sooooooooooooo nice to stretch out on that mattress and drift off into dreamland
but as the years pass and age advances, you begin to feel like your bed is out to get you.
As sure as God created the green grass, you can be equally sure that I'm by no means some princess
but when I lay myself out for the night I can feel that pea under the mattress. It seems to be more like a coconut.
Sometimes, if I'm not devastatingly tired, I'll grab whatever written tale of derring-do I'm currently reading and
attempt to get comfortable as I flip through the pages but there is always some small ache or pain that keeps me
readjusting my position until I'm comfortable and, once I find that cozy recline, I begin all over again because the lighting isn't right.
Finally, my eyes get too heavy and I lay the book down or sometimes even fall asleep holding the thing.
(I'll drop it sometime through the night and wake myself up again)
Now I'm asleep and that's when it begins:
A coil spring begins to nudge you in the ribs.
Gently at first and then it builds to a point where it feels like a fireplace poker.
The mattress is actually quite good but it doesn't like you.
So, I move around and reposition myself and again drift back into slumber.
The bed isn't having any of this.
The covers fall away or the pillow crawls up your nose.
It doesn't matter - you're awake again.
It becomes a battle of wills. You versus the bed.
Fractured dreams. More tossing and turning.
Your alarm clock's invasive tendrils reach into your brain and poke around until you admit defeat and wake enough to turn it off.
You know you should get up but you still feel exhausted and the bed seems to have decided to torture you even more
by becoming comfortable. You feel like you're laying on the softest and warmest thing in the universe.