The only man alive

So, I am going to attempt a little post that should end up saying some wonderful things about our lives and how we live them. Usually it's the case I write these weird, funky posts with no apparent meaning or direction. I'd like to say this: the reason for those posts is not to offend or annoy or to wind people up, but to illuminate you into the deep mystery of the word of the Lord in Heaven. Now this purpose has left me, a thirty three year old schizophrenic with itchy keyboard fingers, slightly disillusioned and to be frank, lost. Here I am, trying my best to find inspiration in this world, and you know, i've just realised that inspiration IS our world, is our life, and is our existence. But there is more to be said. With the select few enjoying the occurences i like to call words, there are many that simply cannot be bothered to condescend to a nice sentiment. And you know, there is not enough discussion in the way that I think there should be. However, this is because we are all busy people without much time on our hands. It just so happens that, in fact, things transpired to leave me with just such a delight: time. Therefore I would like to search for something to say, something to grasp, and something to enjoy.

I've been thinking about things recently; the things i like to think about, namely, existence, time and space, God, illusions, and so on and so forth. I have, for your interest, been taking a long look at something the boffins who live in thinkland have named 'solipsism'. And i've been trying to get around it. For those who don't know about it, solipsism is the idea that because we literally can't know the experiences of others, or see through their eyes, or have any control of others from the inside, thus we find difficulty in ascertaining their reality, their existence, their being. Now, bear with me because this could get interesting. I have struggled with this problem for at least three years. In that time I have been as confused and perplex, not to mention bitter and lonely, because I could not, for the love of Christ, realise that other people existed. There i was in an unforgiving tower of desperate pointlessness that bored me to tears, and I was not creative, nor was I a man of passion. It wasn't until i actually sat and began thinking deeply on the topic that the arrival at a certain conclusion was possible. I find, in result, that if I experienced the perceiving capacity of any other person, there would be huge distinctions between the person who I was and the person who you are.

The answer was simple. If the case was really one where I literally saw the lives of these others from their living experience, then it would also be the rather glaring case I would become confused at knowing the person I actually was. Do you see? Do you see how the fact of our own lives is almost a certainty with this seeming flaw of the world?

Of course then comes the objection: No, I could read another's mind from a certain distance, having no interaction with their body or their behaviour. Then begs the question, "Can this form of mind reading really be said to be as good or as illuminating as controlling some person or other?"

I know what you're thinking, you're thinking, "This guy is an idiot! All he cares about is being God!"

And perhaps that's just it? Perhaps after all this time I had to get round that idea and then get used to it. I don't know. My faculties are not as vibrant as they used to be. However, i would just like to say something which is clear to me. I do sometimes wonder why I am myself. You know I'm the only one who is? I'm not you there sitting with your pepsi in the third row. I am not you with your fingernails painted black and white. I am myself, and this is important, ok? Of course, when i look back over this post, i will inevitably be a different man however close in time. You see, I am of the thinking that life is some sort of living memory, remembered from some future deathbed, or even moments before i will be born again. There's the idea that mind reading is possible, however, am i not reading my own mind? Hey perhspa i am reading your mind. Let's test this theory. Everybody think of a number. Did you say seven? I bet you didn't even think of a number. Hey, I like your style: vote no comment, or what ever you like. Ok so there is one person whose mind i can read, my own. And i tell you, I don't even have to try. Right now I'm thinking, "Why am I in such a bad mood all the time?" Now, I'm thinking, "They get it, Dan." But you're thinking, "This is confusing, I do not think this is confusing." But it isn't confusing, that's the thing. It clears things up for us. Now, i think have i had my presence stolen, because that fits with the idea that actually I have absolutely no clue what is going on in my head. Unfortunately, I have to say, this is largely the case. In fact, my self-mind reading capacity may well be a case of random thinking in the brains! In fact, I tend to suspect I'm here now corrupting several other minds just ignoring existence to the point that we think there is no point. By which i mean, that we might have the will of God inside us.

Think about it. We are related to God, just as we are related to each other. And that's because no matter what continent our ancestors evolved from, we have one 'coherent' source, the big bang. It was a single event. Now the only element of division I should think present in consciousness is something other than God. Now there is no such thing as something other than God. I mean think about it! Is this what the men and women find to be the truth? I am afraid I just do not know. All i know is this: God is everything. There is no room for Satan.

Sometimes i feel like just ending there and not saying what the real ending is. In life there are patterns, so that scares me, because my life will probably be just as shortened. And you know what? There's a song for everyone. My question is will that song be cut short?

Now i know you're thinking, this guy is wasting my time. Well you know what? I'm sorry you had to read. unless you enjoyed it.

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