Edge of Darkness Part 10

I moved taking his hand in mine. I could feel him there in my hand. He was real. My skin filled with goose bumps. I did not know how it was possible to have him. We moved silently to my room. I never wanted to take my eyes off of him. Every part of my wounded and black soul seemed to settle. To take peace. I felt the peace like laying in the dirt, the electric peace, energy coursing through my veins. I was not dead. The green warm eyes pulling me into them. Daylight was flooding this place and I needed to be alone with him in the darkness. His palled lips seemed to move but I heard nothing. He was alive and he did not hate me. The world looked like it always did. Everything was flesh and bone. I was not lost looking into a bottomless pit. I shut the door behind us. Darkness covered the room. There was no light but his eyes I could still see the warm green. He was at peace.

I moved my fingers across his face. It was there and yet the edges seems to fray and fade a bit. I could feel as his hands caressed my checks moving up my face. His touch so light it was like a bird’s feather brushing past me. What could I say to him. How could I make him understand what I felt? Sorry was a word but it failed to express the deepest of feelings. I could not take back what I had done. I had killed him and yet here he was. He was breathing and standing in front of me cloaked in the dark mist. Waves of full alertness to utter fall down sleepiness washed egarly over me. I did not want to lose sight of him for one minute. I did not want to lose him. Green burning eyes held mine as tears escaped blurring him. His hands moved down my neck cradling it as he moved to my shoulders. I could feel his fingers touching me so softly like a warm breeze wrapping itself around me. Darkness blotted out all light and sounds. I could hear his heartbeat just like when I laid on his chest. The rhythm seductively pulling all of me into him. I needed him. I needed someone.

His embrace felt warm yet so empty. It was like something was missing. Through all the darkness and its sweet seduction I embraced him. He was real. My check brushed against his. The heat of the day attempted to invade. The stillness swept over my body. I moved away from his embrace grasping his hand. I laid on the bed and he lay next to me. His eyes still clear in all of the dark mist. My eyes seemed to blur him out of focus. The gentle brush of my hair back reminded me of the wind pushing hair about. His fingers brushed against my eyes closing them. I needed to be lost for a bit and he was here with me. The darkness all around us but he was unfazed by it. Maybe life could carry on or after life. The feeling of his warm breath on my forehead just before the kiss. It was so soft like a rose petal rushing past you, barely touching you. Peace. The darkness and his eyes seemed to melt away everything. It did not matter about the lust for blood and revenge. He was here and I was not alone. I curled next to his body unable to really feel him. It felt like any minute he would fade away. It would not happen again. I would not let him.

I let go of the breath I was holding. All of the feelings that held me to humanity and pain seemed to slip away. The feeling of being unburdened let me fall. I fell within myself. Nothing seemed to grab hold of me. I was like Alice falling down the rabbit hole. I waited for the clocks and furniture to pass by me. I faded into darkness. I wanted the table with the eat me cookies and drink me potion. I could grow big and small and fall into another world. My body moved without my permission. I opened my eyes as the feeling of lost control swept through me. My hand would not move under my power it moved on its own. Pain surged through my body. Where was I? I had been with Ryan. “Wake up!!” is all that a whispered scream mustered. The cold liquid on my hands was not my own. What had I done?

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