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Date: 9/19/2009 10:41:00 PM
From Authorid: 42945
I hear you loud and clear Brenda and the sad part about other's attitudes when they do or are having a tough time of it, they are mainly just thinking of themselves and it's all about me, me, me.  When you think how many hours one spends at work of a day, it always seemed to make me stop and think, well, let's make the most of the day and concentrate on my work instead of other personal things that I have on my mind. I suppose we all handle personal problems differently, but once in the work place it would be so much happier all around if everyone could leave their problems in the car park and put on a happy face no matter what. Negativity rubs off, and if one is working with someone who is constantly negative about things, it is very hard to be understanding all of the time that the person is having a tough time of things.. If we don't feel happy at any given time, surely we can put on a brave and happy face and maybe it will help to make someone else do the same..I've worked with all kinds of tempremental people and learned over the years to be a good listener, but then just threw myself into my work, and besides I was too busy most of the time to let their negativity get to me. It took me a long time to be able to do just that I might add sis...lol...*hugs*  |
Date: 9/19/2009 10:50:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 12341
Thanks Zema for your well thought comment. I usually am busy enough that I don't let it get to me, but lately I've noticed just how much when others came to work all snarky and mean, that it does affect everyone, we don't laugh or talk as much,.our mood is affected and everyone can't wait to get out and go home. Sometimes I go the extra mile to try and get someone who is having a bad day to just "loosen up" by making jokes and being extra nice, but some won't buy it. I hate feeling like I'm working in a funeral home where everyone has to be somber and quiet.  |
Date: 9/20/2009 2:56:00 AM
From Authorid: 53054
I think that the worst thing is when people hate their job and tell everyone else to hate it as well because they winge so much about how much they dont want to be there. It makes everyone else feel bad around them. Sometimes you just have to tell them how it is and say look i dont like somethings either, but I am still here...or whatever. I know how frustrating it can get, but I am a strong believer that work should stay at work, and home stuff stays at home.  |
Date: 9/20/2009 9:52:00 AM
From Authorid: 28848
Maybe you can take them aside and talk to them about it. Ask them whats wrong, if there is anything you can do to make it better etc.  |
Date: 9/20/2009 10:19:00 AM
From Authorid: 36901
I have a client who treats me like crap on a daily basis. When I first started caring for her, she would make me cry every day. I've since learned to overlook her hatefulness and she can't stand it. No matter how badly she treats me, I just smile and nod my head. That really makes her mad and it makes me smile (LOL). She told me once that she takes her pain out on me because I'm the only person there and the only person she has to talk to. I've learned not to let her get to me. Keep in mind I'm with her 7 days a week. There are times when I really want to tell her off, but it seems that smiling when she is ranting at me is the best revenge and I don't even have to do anything to be ashamed of to get back at her.  |
Date: 9/20/2009 12:29:00 PM
From Authorid: 22852
@}~~ OK, maybe this is mean of me but I always smile at them when they act like this, it really ticks them off and they talk trash about me but I continue to smile and be nice and than the other people are like "why are you talking trash? She is so nice" it makes me feel good. So try to just smile and know that you have done nothing wrong and it is that person with the problem.   |
Date: 9/20/2009 3:11:00 PM
From Authorid: 26303
I try really hard to be the happy one at work. Mostly, it just comes naturally, but sometimes I work at it to make others feel better. But sometimes, when I've had a bad morning with my teenage boys, or an arguement with my hubby, I'm just not myself. I get better as the day progresses, mostly, but there are times when I'm low. Now my boss and a few around her believe what happens outside the gates, stays outside the gates. All very well in theory, but practically that just doesn't work. Even with them! I always know when they are upset about something, I ask if they are okay, and they spill their guts. Now, sometimes the boss is very short and cranky with people and she'll let slip what has happened to her. We are human, and it is only natural for this to happen. I actually get annoyed when people say leave it at home. Instead of being cranky with them, ask them what's wrong. Chat to them, talk about their lives. Sometimes, just the fact that someone shows them friendship softens them up. I've done this for years, and it really helps. I sometimes can be someone who whinges about others, I love my job, but sometimes there are aspects, or people that annoy me. I'm trying hard at the moment, not to whinge, cos that brings people down and myself down. I'm gonna fake it til I make it!!!  |
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Date: 9/20/2009 3:31:00 PM
From Authorid: 43991
One of my favorite songs describes this situation. It's not just about work.. but about how people who are having a bad time take it out on others. It is called "Pixie" by Ani Difranco. Here are some of the lyrics.. "The man behind the counter looks like he's got A half a dozen places he'd rather be and furthermore it looks like he's prepared To take it all out on me Buddy, I don't really care what your problem is Just don't make it mine Come on kids, let's all hold hands And pretend we're having a good time" I really agree with these lyrics.. especially this next part.. "Maybe you don't like your job Maybe you didn't get enough sleep Well nobody likes their job Nobody got enough sleep Maybe you just had The worst day of your life But you know there's no escape And there's no excuse So just suck up and be nice" Exactly! We ALL have our problems, so come on.. lets all just suck it up and be nice. lol.  |
Date: 9/20/2009 4:11:00 PM
From Authorid: 10245
If I'm having it rough, I make it a point to keep to myself. If I tell you to go away and leave me alone - heed the advice!!  I try not take my bad days out on others, but it does sometimes happen.I've worked with people like this. They don't make the place you spend 1/3 of your life an enjoyable place to be.  |
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Date: 9/20/2009 5:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 4144
i try to always leave all the crap where it is. no sense in dragging other people down. can't say i haven't complained at times!! i think some people just want everybody else to be as miserable as they are. a friend of mine just gave notice at her job because of one co-worker. she didn't give her boss the real reason. just told her she was tired of all the bull and drama. her boss figured it out because that is the same reason 7 other people have gave notice in the past year. you would think the boss would get rid of the problem child and keep the real workers.  |
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Date: 9/20/2009 6:20:00 PM
From Authorid: 10245
You would think so, wouldn't you, MomaBug? I also left a job once due to the attitude of a co-worker. I was the 9th person in less than 2 1/2 years to do so. I did talk with the owner before I actually quit and explained to him where I was having issues. Other shad also spoken to him about the way she treated the rest of us. He spoke with her about it and assured me that she would be talking to me about it and that things would change. I waited 3 weeks for that conversation to take place. It never did.... so I walked. Last I checked, she was still employed there... more than 15 years later. What she had over me? The ability to cook the books the way he liked them... and probably more than a little dirt on him. |
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Date: 9/20/2009 7:43:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 12341
Thanks for all the great advice! I don't wish this person anything bad, but I hate feeling depressed just because someone is. I try to leave everything that worries me or causes me to feel bad away from work, even at home as well. I just work my way through it but when someone always brings their problems to work it becomes a dread for me. |
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Date: 9/20/2009 7:45:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 12341
Aussie Girl, I like that "fake it till you make it" sounds like a winner. |
Date: 9/20/2009 10:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 7710
When I go to work (or whenever I interact with others), I try to leave all of my problems to myself. It really does annoy me when people who are having bad days take it out on others. Zema said it best  |
Date: 9/21/2009 12:55:00 PM
From Authorid: 64637
Hello Brenda, nice to meet you. I have a co worker that does this same thing, and the work environment that we have really doesn't need anymore foul attitudes to add to it. I just try to be the bigger person and kill 'em with kindness. It will either A. make them realize that they are acting like a jerk and try and be nicer, or B. make them even more madder because they are just an angry person and do not wish at all to feel better, and want everyone to be as miserable as they are. I don't try to get even with anybody, because I could really care less. There are alot of vindictive people at my workplace, and I just let them be themselves. Their nastiness will eventually catch up with them. Karma sucks. HUGS  |
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Date: 9/21/2009 7:39:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 12341
Thanks Gungan. I agree. |
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Date: 9/21/2009 7:40:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 12341
Midnight Sun, thanks so much, I know thats the best attitude to take. I always say Karma is and Karma will. |
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