Date: 10/5/2008 9:46:00 AM
From Authorid: 3263
You've gone through a LOT of major life changes this year, any of which would be pretty overwhelming on their own but you've got them coming one right after the other. I'd say that it's normal for your thoughts, feelings and emotions to be all over the board right now, so don't beat yourself up over it.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 9:47:00 AM
From Authorid: 27534
You just get married.....a baby.....so much now crowding your life and the big word of commitment to add to all of that....asking yourself ....is this the life I want to loose who I am and become my mother? It happens and it is a circle of life. We don't all know what role we want to play or what role we have to paly....I would suggest you take care of you......eat right....get lots of exercise...your hormones and body is changing...it can work on you.....exercise produces a natural brain chemical ...endomorphine...and it gives you the sense of well being....and I have heard these thoughts before...you are not alone my friend..  |
Date: 10/5/2008 9:50:00 AM
From Authorid: 4995
I had those feelings too. Right after I already had my baby. It was postpartum and after medication and about two months I was able to get through it and bond with her. You are NOT bad to feel what you do. They are just feelings. You will have great days and low days during this time. Keep an eye on how you are feeling after your baby is born,though. If you end up going through postpartum tell your doctor and they can help you a LOT. It's natural to be scared and yes even wondering about what you want. Don't EVER let anyone make you feel bad about that. Like Wise said,hormones do a lot to a person. You will be a great mother. CP.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 9:53:00 AM
From Authorid: 10657
There's nothing wrong with you sweetie! Lots of mothers go through this stage however, I would discuss this with your ob/gyn so, that she can get you started early on the right treatment for you. You have had a lot of life changes come your way as well. And, it's okay to be confused by it all. It's okay to have worries and to wonder if, it's to soon. It doesn't mean you don't love your baby any less it just means that you are going through life changes. Your body is going to do lots of things in this stage. Your hormones are running on high. (((HUGS)))  |
Date: 10/5/2008 10:02:00 AM
From Authorid: 13636
Wait, you don't trust your ability to do what you're supposed to? Thinking you're unfit to do anything like your elders did before you?
Welcome to mother-hood and adult-hood, honey.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 10:03:00 AM
From Authorid: 21903
I wish I knew what to tell you about how to make the feelings go away, but maybe it is that things are just now sinking in and you are more afraid of those 'what if's' than you were before. But you have to remember, those are just extreme 'what if's', "what if I don't want the baby, what if I don't love my husband, what if my life is miserable after having the baby?" This is a BIG change...having a baby is most definately going to change both your relationship and your life, but it is going to be for the better, not the worse. Sounds like you are just having doubts out of being scared...I'd be scared too, b/c like I said, that is a huge change. Maybe you could talk to your husband about your fears (not the one about loving him though  !). Maybe he is just as scared or maybe he can offer some reassurance for you. Everything will be alright; I'll keep you in my prayers. I hope you feel better soon.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 10:06:00 AM
From Authorid: 10245
it's completely normal to have those kinds of thoughts... try not to beat yourself up about it, or you'll only make yourself feel worse. Feelings are never "wrong", they just are, so don't judge yourself over them. Being pregnant is an exhausting job, and being tired makes everything seem so much "more". Get lots of rest, eat healthy foods and try to keep busy doing things you love. I can tell you this from my own experience: my last baby was not well timed. I had 2 toddlers under 2, I was just coming out of a severe postpartum depression and thought I didn't want him because there was no way I could handle it all and live up to the responsibility God was trusting me with. I considered abortion, and then suicide. I can honestly say he's the best thing that's ever happened to me. Hang in there.... it will get better. And if it doesn't don't hesitate to talk to your doctor about it. These are the things that no one talks about, but it's not at abnormal, AT ALL... it's just pushed under the rug.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 10:48:00 AM
From Authorid: 28848
Hugs. Dont forget that your hormones are out of whack during this time. Stick with a good diet and take your preg. vitamins. And dont stop living just as you did before you found out. So far nothing has changed enough to make you stop doing anything as you normally would.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 11:12:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 21266
Thanks guys. I guess it's just about being blessed with so many things at once I forget to enjoy each one as they come. Not being alone makes me feel a lot better. I will talk to my obgyn about it, I hope she'll be able to prescribe something to take it away. I don't want to spend my early days in pregnancy so miserable. There's nothing worse than feeling alone in all of this. I'm so glad I have you guys. =)  |
Date: 10/5/2008 12:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 33925
What you are feeling is 100% natural honey. You are going through some life altering changes and it is only natural to start questioning things and yourself. It will pass as you start to adjust to what is coming. *hugs*  |
Date: 10/5/2008 1:11:00 PM
From Authorid: 63241
I kept a diary when I was pregnant the last time (16 years ago). I wrote out all my feelings & wishes for my baby. Reading it now I realize that some days were horrible and some days were great and I now realize that the influence of the hormones affected me greatly. I never regretted writing this diary and putting my feelings on paper was a great stress reliever. I hope you start to feel better real soon.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 1:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 64413
Honey your feelings are all understandable and everyone goes thru these thought processes...In no time your beautiful little one will be with you and all of these worries will be forgotten with the joy of your new baby.. I promise...I think every woman goes thru this...and with EVERY pregnancy... Love, Sage  |
Date: 10/5/2008 1:48:00 PM
From Authorid: 21203
Not sure if anyone said it here....but journal. My oldest just turned 13 and my baby 9 - Absz it goes too fast. Like others said - what your feeling is normal. BTW - chocolate always helps me...! illy  |
Date: 10/5/2008 2:55:00 PM
From Authorid: 21764
awww.. I'm not sure of the right answer since I have never been pregnant but everyone here has some great advice and I will keep you in my thoughts that you will feel better soon. *big hugs*  |
Date: 10/5/2008 3:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 7830
Awww hon its so normal what youre going through. Not only are you going through huge life changes but your body is also going through massive changes and hormonal flucuations that can make you feel very depressed. Just be good to yourself right now, do something special for yourself, let yourself feel these things and everything will be ok. *HUGS*  |
Date: 10/5/2008 3:26:00 PM
From Authorid: 46527
Aww, sweetie, it's normal to have that horrible 'OMG is this REALLY the right thing to do' moment. It'll pass....hugggss  |
Date: 10/5/2008 3:39:00 PM
From Authorid: 63366
One word—hormones. Next week you’ll probably be on the up slope. So hang in there.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 3:45:00 PM
From Authorid: 42945
I'll just say this to you sweetie...you're feelings are 100% normal, and if you can't cope with them hun, see your doctor...*hugs*  |
Date: 10/5/2008 3:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 16845
Awww, I remember that from my oldest....it was horrible. I think it's fairly normal. But do not hesitate to talk to your doctor if it becomes prolonged. Mine hit more towards the end.....I had her the end of March, and it hit me beginning of Feb. I think it lasted 2 weeks.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 4:06:00 PM
From Authorid: 33286
I remember my depression at the beginning of MY pregnancy... man it was the longest gestation on record **looks at belly and yells** "when are you coming out??????" been 20 years so far...  |
Date: 10/5/2008 5:55:00 PM
From Authorid: 15677
welcome to pregnancy hunny and married life. sorry sometimes it sucks. i cant really add anything that my wonderful friends here at usm havent already said except you can talk to me any time, profile is always open to my sister) i love you and i am so happy for you, just wait youll see this baby will show you a love you never knew exsisted.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 8:06:00 PM
From Authorid: 55297
AHD- Its normal, especially for a first time mother. I was unsure of if I wanted my baby too, if I would be a good mom, how I would do this on my own... etc... And you know what? As soon as 12 weeks rolled around and I heard my daughters heartbeat, I knew I loved her, had loved her since the day I found out I was pregnant... And 28 weeks later, when I was holding this perfectly formed little person in my arms, knowing it was my voice she recognized, my heartbeat she was soothed my, my smell that she knew, I knew, as I had know all along, that I loved her. I knew I would be the best mother possible to her and shower her with my love. And, when, 12 months later I found myself pregnant for her brother, I felt the same way. I thought, Jake and I have only been together for 6 months, will this ruin us? can Ihandle another baby since he will be deploying shortly after his birth? Can I do this? Do I want to? Am I ready? and again, I knew, when I heard his heartbeat for the first time... The love was undeniable. Trust me hun, it will get better. If you need to talk, msg me ok? Ive been there, maybe I can help. Much love and best wishes.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 9:06:00 PM
From Authorid: 35720
I think it's normal for a new mom.. you'll be okay.  |
Date: 10/5/2008 10:00:00 PM
From Authorid: 47218
Those pregnancy hormones will do a number on you. You should talk to a doctor about this.  |
Date: 10/6/2008 12:41:00 PM
From Authorid: 6731
Sweetie, these reactions are SO normal! With my son I was the same way, it was so much so soon, and so hard to get used to. I think keeping a journal is a good idea. Not just for you, but for your baby when they are older and going through the same questions and doubts, you can bring it out and say "hey it's okay"  |
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Date: 10/7/2008 6:32:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 21266
Thank you so much everyone..You've lifted up my spirit with all your wonderful answers =) |
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Date: 10/7/2008 10:07:00 AM
From Authorid: 33286
no, seriously. **yells at stomach** when are you coming out??? |
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Date: 10/7/2008 10:08:00 AM
From Authorid: 33286
oop, I just felt it kick. |
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Date: 10/7/2008 1:12:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 21266
lol Hack ;P thanks for the giggle *hugs* |
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Date: 10/7/2008 5:12:00 PM
From Authorid: 33286
my pleasure sweetie... it will get easier for you. be well. |
