How do you get over a best friend? And why did it end anyways?

I didnt wanna say 'loss' because she didnt die. Whatever happened it was weird. And it was months ago. And Im still upset about it...but I dont think at the moment contacting her would be right. So I kinda wondered how to get over it. Also any clues in the story about WHY this happened would be great.

What happened was about a year ago I met a girl at a music show. She was extremely shy, I was extremely crazy. I was always nice to everyone who was 'new' to me and we began writing on myspace between the shows (which became more spaced out as the band fell apart). We both liked writing looooong letters and we found though we had way different backgrounds, we were extremely similar.

However right away I worried about a few things. I talk forever in person and on the phone and any way you give me, she on the other hand would only be talkative after a looooong warm up of conversation, and she would always be afraid to 'interupt' others with her comments (even if it really wasnt an interuption). So I was scared something could go awkward there.

She was also in a similarly crappy situation like I was job wise and life wise. I come up with a million ideas a day, and if I really mean em I REALLY mean em! If I say Im gonna go be President of MTV (LOL NEVER but just an example) then Im workin towards it. She would dream big too, and even small...but never do anything. This was sad as she was unemployed, almost 30, and living with her verbally abusive and controlling parents. One or two steps she could have lived out her dream of independence (she was college educated). She knew this, she'd talk about it at length, yet she never would DO anything. For example she told me she'd move out WHEN SHE MET ME THAT VERY NIGHT but a year later had not even looked. She was that afraid.

I on the other hand am still trying to clean up my life, but when I said I was gonna ditch it all and move to a new state in 2 months...I did. Im still here. I dont regret it, Im sure its the best thing I've ever done.

I tell these examples because I was ALWAYS afraid I was 'pushing' her too hard. When I talk to anyone I always say work towards your goals, reach for the stars...and obviously we talked a lot. But since she was so meek I was scared to death I was coming off as bossy when I really just wanted to be a good friend. For the record she never SAID I did any of those things, but...I wodner still.

As our 'one year friendship anniversary' reached I was making some big changes in my life again for the better. I hadnt seen her in maybe 6 months or so. But we were constantly in contact, and since she had lived a few hours away before my move it really didnt seem too different. As I made my new goals she reaffirmed hers, and we talked for HOURS about them.

Then my the anniversary, and my birthday (which occured right before I met her) neared. She has money despite being unemployed because her parents are wealthy (she never actually moved out, so even when she had a job she just saved. She never told me an exact amount but it was hinted that she had $10s of thousands of dollars)...yet she is extremely frugal (never buys herself anything, wont go anywhere, wont eat out, I suspect wont move out due to some of the frugalness...I mean if you had no rent or expenses why bother?) She herself mentioned visiting the week of my birthday, and we would do this that this that and this (mostly her ideas).

However she dragged her booty on confirming it, and as the month before neared I asked her to call me and let me know, I didnt care one way or another but for planning I needed to know. She called me back, and told me yes she was coming, likely on this date, and as the events grew closer she narrowed down a weekend and we made some solid plans
The weekend passed...and I didnt hear from her which was odd because at the least one way or another (phone, email, whatever) I heard from her once a week and with the obvious 'planned arrival date' it was kinda urgent...I know she could go either way so I seriously didnt know. Then the day hit, and still no word from her despite my calls asking what was up. One event passed, then another, and by the end of the week I finally got a hold of her. She brushed it off as nothing had happened, told me what she did that weekend (went to lunch with her sister), and didnt mention replanning or anything.

I was mad, but she was one of my two best friends so I thought Id wait and give her time to explain so I wouldnt be pushy ya know? She called me the next weekend, and we talked about some of my new goals and she was really REALLY excited for me. We talked for HOURS! A few days later her myspace and facebook were deleted (she had told me she was planning to do this but never said when, and I hadnt heard from her since the one phone call). I didnt have her email, so I tried to call her. I didnt get through. I figured she could call me back. She never did.

My birthday passed. Lamely despite my best efforts. Then another 2 weeks passed...and a package came in the mail from her. In it was a thought out sweet card saying how she hopes I reach all my goals and she really believes in me and how she had handpicked out each thing with a reason in mind. Each gift had a post note on it explaining why she picked it. They were out of the blue and sweet: a vegetarian cookbook (to get back in shape and stop eating rice all the time cuz I cant cook worth a dang!), a magnent notepad to write my goals and things down on, and a gift card to my favorite resteraunt worth a meal.

She never called, never did anything. After another major event I sent her some pictures and things from a rock show we had discussed attending, and she had basically become a major fan of this artist so I wanted to tell her how the whole thing (and the plans we had but I still did went). I mentioned I might be moving but heres my number, heres my email, you know myspaces and such...what happened and are you mad at me? Let me know. She never did. This was at least a month and a half ago.

I try not to think about it a lot but it does make one wonder ya know? Do you think I offended her accidentally like I feared? Or maybe her frugality got in the way and she was too embarassed to admit it? Or something else :S? And what can I/should I do about this? Just forget it...and seriously I find it hard because it was so well...random! Thanks :)

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