Date: 5/10/2008 6:22:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
oh btw...I was rediagnosed by the pysch doc. I dont have any of the things my primary doctor said i have. I simply have post tramatic stress disorder(from both the suicide and past molestations and rapes..sorry if this is to much info) I also have panic disorder and slight bordline personality disorder( that is a new one and looking the symptoms up...could be anyone). so tired of the labels...just want me back  |
Date: 5/10/2008 6:29:00 AM
From Authorid: 51876
This is a delicate subject that cuts to the heart of the matter concerning legal addictions.You are in a catch 22 and cannot rely on anyone but your own determination and will it seems.The physical looks like it will be harder than the mental.There are no easy fixes.It will take a conscious,concerted effort from you.Talk to your family,get your kids away from you for a week and start cutting your dosage down.Go cold turkey for the first 2 days,Take a low dosage on the 3 and then go for 4 days and then take a small amount.Keep doubling or adding 2 days to your routine and I guarantee if you stick to this sequence it will help.Sorry their is no easy ways.Bless you and hope things work out for you.  |
Date: 5/10/2008 6:35:00 AM
From Authorid: 51876
Boy they really want to keep you in a straight jacket.Addressing the mental issues you have is a good thing yet the labels keep you paralyzed.You want to be you.Do it.
I have been through a lot myself even to prison and back 2002-2004.I have seen real Crazy and Insane.Seen how many pills they will put you on there if you start working with the Psych docs.The secret is to stay away from the Crazy Psychiatric"doctors"..... |
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Date: 5/10/2008 6:37:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
bru....thank you. are you a nuse because the stuff I am on can cause withdrawls so servere (and actually mentally is going to kick my arse) that i can seizure and perhaps die. if you are a nurse, i would appreciate talking with your further. I am really close to having my bf tie me to the bed (like he jokes) and making me go through it. my youngest goes to cali (back home...which I miss) this summer. might be the time to do it...lol..in the dark without electricty and cabl and net as I cant find a dang job anyways. but at least I will figure out who the real connie is again and then medicate when NEEDD for real anxiety...but I think I am in need of some deep phychotherapy |
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Date: 5/10/2008 6:39:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
yes...one labels me, the other dismisses it and puts on a new label and gives me more drugs that make me feel more crazy. a vicious cycle. I sit in the therapists ofice and look at all the goodies he receives from the drug reps....sick stuff i feel a poem coming on:P I always write when I am on the brink. |
Date: 5/10/2008 6:44:00 AM
From Authorid: 30747
I wish I had the answer for you. I understand what you're saying about being ignored and it's not fair. I'm not a believer in drugs solving any psychological problems because I've seen them make things so much worse and destroy lives. (my brother is a perfect example) It takes a lot of strength and conviction (and faith IMO) to move on from the pain and just live life. If you want yourself back...TAKE yourself back. You are a smart woman who knows what has to be done. You don't need those doctors and those pills telling you all that is wrong with you. You need someone telling you what is right with you. I hope you find your strength again because I know it's in you. My thoughts and prayers are with you and if there is anything I can do, please let me know.  |
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Date: 5/10/2008 6:49:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
soul...thank you. I am just not sure where that strong woman is anymore. geeze, I am EMO today. but thank you. |
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Date: 5/10/2008 7:12:00 AM
From Authorid: 51876
Sorry, I am not a nurse but a holistic medicine practioner.I beleive in moderation in all things.Go the natural way.Hope you get through this.If you ever need a friend.just message me. |
Date: 5/10/2008 7:21:00 AM
From Authorid: 36704
After just getting out of the hospital what I find most ironic is that you're asking for help for problems you know you have and they're ignoring you where my problems were attributed to things that I wasn't complaining about. I've spent two weeks with nausea and vomiting and stomach pain that was attributed to stress, an ulcer and anxiety from current situations in my personal life. I kept saying, but I'm not really stressed or have anxiety but was told that it was just manifesting itself through my stomach. I have pancreatitis, much different than stress induced stomach issues and so I went through two weeks of hell being told it was something it wasn't. My Dr. when he handed me the stomach meds told me I can't overdose on them so don't try, thinking I would, when he was not diagnosing me correctly with the pancreatitis, which can kill me. lol I have to laugh at the irony of that. I tell them mentally I'm fine, they worry, you tell them you're not and they do the wrong thing. Doctors, they're funny creatures. I hope you get the help you need, you know your mind and body better than they do, so just keep persisting.  |
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Date: 5/10/2008 7:21:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
*mental hugz bru* |
Date: 5/10/2008 7:54:00 AM
From Authorid: 10657
My advice isn't a quick fix it's more like you will have to pound the pavement advice. Look into social security even if, it's just for a short amount of time that will get you the help that you need. Go see a social security advocate to do the paperwork for you and have all your medical records on hand to give to the advocate. Go to your local hospital and apply for the hill-burton program or charity program this will help get you mental healthcare. Call local churches in your area to see if, they can help with your bills, food, and clothing needs. Find out if Salvation Army is available in your area they have tons of resources available. Good Luck to you and ((HUGS))  |
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Date: 5/10/2008 7:58:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
tex....the deal is I dont want anymore drugs. I have never had issues before the death of my father and I see the medical profession as more of a problem or shall I say the psych profession more of a problem that any of the problems that I started having. I will take your advice though and see what can happen.....scary shicaca. this is a small town. all programs have like a 2 month waiting list and not many resources though. |
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Date: 5/10/2008 8:30:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
author only...ty...actually I was on the same thing for sleep. I think I can do this on my own. I KNOW i will try my damnest. thanks for the advice. stay in the moment! |
Date: 5/10/2008 10:44:00 AM
From Authorid: 11240
Loving Father, Please Take All these "demons" out of Connie's life so that she may more fully enjoy the life You Have Meant for her. Stay strong in spirit (mind), keep Him in your heart at ALll Times, and He Will Provide All you need. God Bless.  |
Date: 5/10/2008 12:07:00 PM
From Authorid: 28848
Been there with wanting help and not getting it. It seems like its always the severely screwed up losers who statistically won't rehabilitate or change and don't really care enough to even want to that are getting all the help and sucking up all of the funds for help. Its the way of the world I think. It definitely doesnt make any sense. I wish you well. Hang in there.  |
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Date: 5/10/2008 1:40:00 PM ( Admin )
CB.. I have no real advice for you, I just want to tell you I love you and you are a wonderful person. Many Dr's today are just pushers for Drug companies. Sometimes you have to help yourself to get any help at all medically. 1000000 hugs. |
Date: 5/10/2008 2:45:00 PM
From Authorid: 31531
I have no idea what you are going though,I just wanted to let you know you will be in my thoughts and prayers,prayers are always strong if you truely belive in them.>> BIG HUGS >>  |
Date: 5/10/2008 3:15:00 PM
From Authorid: 11176
omg blossom*hugz* i had no idea all this was going on, i'm praying for you my friend  |
Date: 5/10/2008 3:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 26303
Connie, you said that you weren't sure where the strong woman was anymore. I can tell you something. She is there within you. We see her here at this post. She is the one who can tell all of us that she needs help, she is the one who is baring her pain to us. That takes strength Connie! Thinking of you.  |
Date: 5/10/2008 3:53:00 PM
From Authorid: 10245
I've missed you around here. I also wish I had an answer for you.... unfortunately, all I can offer is a shoulder and some prayers. Hang in there. You'll beat this and find YOU again. I know your're strong enough. You haven't survived everything you have to give up now.  |
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Date: 5/11/2008 5:31:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
thanks guys. I have been absent a lot because I felt weird coming back after so much time and finidng so mnay new faces and never seeing old. I check in from time to time. then I post for advice and bam....you are all here, old and new friends. it means a lot. |
Date: 5/15/2008 2:15:00 PM
From Authorid: 21203
Hey!!!!! Who are you calling OLD!?  |
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Date: 5/16/2008 6:03:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 20296
I am really touched guys. I have found a doctor that will work with me to get off the scripts i do not feel I need. as far as the wallet goes....hmmmmm.....*shakes head* I am temporarily messed up in the department. seems that they have no record of my birth (so my birth mother says) long sordid story there. I am trying to work out some stuff. i have been told to see a lawyer as i am not legally anyone. I have a fictitous last name....or did when I married, applied for ss card, ect. never was it legally changed by my father (who .....geeze, I need to be on some crap talk show with my stories). well....prayers...and strength are what i am needing and some hope. i still have hope. one day at a time. *hugz ya all mentally* |
Date: 12/24/2009 11:47:00 AM
From Authorid: 63400
you..need...to,..be..with...the..soul..thats....yours...or..you...will...cry..thats why...knock?..knock?....who..here?...huh...?.hmmm?...ahh...GOT...NO...IDEA...yes...i.do....howdy..dooo..  |
