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The Communications Gap between the Genders Is Solved!!

  Author:  52140  Category:(Humor) Created:(4/3/2008 8:04:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (1674 times)

I've been researching how to effectively to communicate with males(hence my questions on USM about it). I've found a website that solves it all.

http://watkins.gospelcom.net/charcom.htm

The best part of all is Tip number 3:

Androgen-English (males) makes for good newspaper articles; Estrogen-English (female) for epic novels.

For instance, when a male returns home from a job interview, he usually blurts out "I got the job!" or "[No, I didn't]!" When a women arrives home, a male may hear, "I couldn't wait to get home to tell you." "So, the answer is?," he foolishly replies, trying to read her facial and body language.

"Sit down and I'll tell you all about it."

"But did you get the job?!" he says more forcefully--and foolishly.

"I had a really tough time picking out what to wear. You know, I wanted something professional, but not pretentious. Well anyway, I decided on the gray suit, but I wore this blouse because it looks a bit more casual."

By this time the significant other has resigned himself to not getting an answer until the next presidential election. There's a detailed description of the office ("There seemed to be a lot of tension in the office. Everyone was nice, but something didn't seem quite right") plus a complete transcript of the actual interview and emotional responses to each line of dialog ("The man I'd be working for seemed nice enough, but I could tell he was a bit of a sexist from his exclusive language").

"So, did you get the job?"

"You weren't listening to me! I told you there's a lot of tension in the office."

In journalism, male communication is called an "inverted pyramid." Give the reader "who," "what," "where," "when," "why," and "how" in the lead paragraph and then, in each subsequent paragraph, give lesser and lesser important information.

So, if you'd like the thirty-second "Headline News" version of our trip "down under," (to Australia) ask me. If you want PBS's "News Hour" version, ask Lois (his wife).

Translation tip: With this in mind, Lois now tries to talk with me as if she was sitting at an anchor desk with a thirty-second "news break." She provides only the information that's important enough to include in our annual Christmas letter or to demand the services of a plumber, neurosurgeon, or lawyer. And once I know the five "W's" and an "H," then I'm more willing to listen to the "indepth reporting" of less important details and her emotional reaction to each.

And I'm trying to provide her with more than a "sound byte" of my day. But sometimes, we males are incapable of even that as we will discover in my final theory.

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Halloween is Right around the corner.. .







 
Replies:      
Date: 4/3/2008 10:11:00 PM  ( Admin )   I agree with this tottttttallllllyyy.. Did I show you what I was wearing.. lol
Date: 4/4/2008 2:57:00 AM  From Authorid: 42945    LOL!! so true LOL!!!  

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