good lord...halloween

So I joined USM about seven or eight years ago...since then life got really weird. I somehow ended up deployed to iraq, then I was discharged from the military because I charged a tank with a baseball bat. I ended up in florida where I was chased around the state by thugs with baseball bats. I ended up on the run until I showed up in florida with a tent and a can of beans. I pitched my tent in the woods and woke up one morning to some girl standing at the door of my tent screaming: HELP THEM! I told her to go away, and she proceeded to tell me some wacked story about an indian burial ground. Then she disappeared into thin air.

So I packed up my tent and started to leave when I tripped over a skeleton. I started cursing and picked up the skull and threw it at the local wal mart. Suddenly that wal mart was locked down and police were called. I skipped town and ended up in the middle of nowhere and that girl showed up again, she told me I was terrible at being a hero, and now it's time to help some other people.

So I guess I'm off somewhere else now to find more dead bodies and hopefully find out who they were. Meanwhile this psychotic girl is following me, and a group of thugs with baseball bats is trying to kill me for no reason other than the fact that I coughed on one of them at some point in the past which I cannot remember nor do I want to remember, though I am told it was hilarious. The end.

Show all stories by   Author:  2335 ( Click here )