Date: 9/2/2005 7:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 28848
I think he wants you and the other girl too from the looks of things. He can keep his current gf and keep you as a friend and stand-by girlfriend in case it doesn't work out with his current girl.  |
Date: 9/2/2005 7:33:00 PM
From Authorid: 35160
ditto^^^^^  |
Date: 9/2/2005 7:45:00 PM
From Authorid: 12103
Its dangerous territory to hang out with a guy who has a girlfriend....no matter if he is an ex or not...He needs to figure out what he REALLY wants in my opinion.  |
Date: 9/2/2005 8:04:00 PM
From Authorid: 36850
what was the reason you two broke up in the first place? moonshine3  |
Date: 9/2/2005 8:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 62915
I may get stoned for saying this but if he wants to hang out as friends and not do anything like kiss then I don't see how that is a bad thing. He probably said take things slow because he is confused about how he feels about the both of you. I would respect his wishes and hang out with him but would not do anythign romance wise until he has broken up with his girlfriend. he isn't doing anything wrong by hanging out with you.  |
Date: 9/2/2005 8:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 61977
You have had some god advice here. But it seems to me that it would be hard to just hang out with him as friends if you have such strong feelings for him. It sounds like dangerous territory to me. Be careful is all I can say. I too would like to know why you two broke up in the first place.  |
Date: 9/2/2005 8:36:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 31357
This is the complicated part...he broke up with me 6 months ago...b/c he wanted me to be someone I wasn't...and I found out after that...that he cheated on me...I know that I shouldn't be getting back together with him b/c of what he did...but I forgave him for that, he obviously is seeing that he was wrong and that I was a really great girl for him.  |
Date: 9/2/2005 8:38:00 PM
From Authorid: 35160
hun, if he truely loved you, he would not try to change you and he would not have cheated. YOU deserve better than him!!!!!!  |
Date: 9/2/2005 10:11:00 PM
From Authorid: 62915
YEs but people do change. You have to work out if he is worth the second chance... Maybe try not to hang out with him as much for now. give him a bit of space.  |
Date: 9/2/2005 11:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 7830
means he wants the best of both worlds, or he cant decide which one of you he wants more. tell him lose the g/f or lose you. plain and simple.  |
Date: 9/2/2005 11:18:00 PM
From Authorid: 7830
Ok..here's something you learn once you get older, have kids, and go through a marraige and a divorce. MEN rarely change...and he WILL NOT WILL NOT change is just 6 months, especially if he's a guy younger than 40 yrs old..and rarely do they change then. GIRL dont even put yourself back in that situation..get out while you still have tme.  |
Date: 9/3/2005 2:42:00 AM
From Authorid: 62100
I think that hard as it is you should just back off now and leave him be and see what happens..it could be that he really did learn what he had in you too late and that he truly wants you back..but it's also true that he still has a girlfriend. You have been in those shoes, do you really want to be "the other girl" this time around. I've been down that path and believe me..if he means what he says..you backing off will force him to make a choice..her or you..and if he chooses you, take it slow..there's no rush. If he doesn't choose you...you have your answer..  |
Date: 9/3/2005 8:31:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 31357
But if I do back off then we wouldn't be getting any closer b/c we wouldn't be hanging out together. I think that if I keep hanging out with him he'll just miss me even more b/c he knows that he can't have me right now. I DONT KNOW...I'm so confused. I really want to be with him b/c I love him, but seriously...if he doesn't make up his mind in 2 months then I have to be done with this, and I'll tell him that b/c it's just killing me to be with him and not have so much more.  |
Date: 9/3/2005 8:40:00 AM
From Authorid: 15394
"Just take it slow and hang out like friends for now"... that means, "I like her and I like you and I have to decide if I want one or both"... I just don't get your thinking... He cheated on YOU, broke up with YOU and you are gonna hang around for a couple MONTHS so HE can decide what he wants... sheesh have a little respect for yourself ! You deserve better than this! Don't you? ... tell him to take a long walk off a short pier... if you think this is love, you need to be very careful... give yourself a little more credit that this... he sounds like junk...  |
Date: 9/3/2005 9:34:00 AM
From Authorid: 6915
GhostChic, he IS doing something wrong by hanging out w/ her, dont convince her he's not. He's emotionally cheating on his gf, think if that was you, you would feel betrayed. On the otehr hand, just tell him to choose..and fast to get both of you out of the situation.  |
Date: 9/3/2005 4:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 62915
Um OK so your saying a guy cannot be friends with someone he is attracted to? I honestly don't see a problem with this. I would not mind if my guy hanged out with an ex girlfriend or a girl he found attracted. I just don't see how he is emotionally cheating...  |
Date: 9/3/2005 8:23:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 31357
We were together for 3 years..and obviously his feelings for me haven't left. I know he still loves me...his friends have told me so...he is just confused on what to do now...  |
Date: 9/4/2005 1:28:00 AM
From Authorid: 62100
But ghost-chick..this is way beyond "just being friends"...lady marmalade still has feelings for him and his friends are telling her that he does as for her as well..and she is hanging onto that....and he has alluded to the "possibility" of more with his statement...  |
Date: 9/4/2005 1:32:00 AM
From Authorid: 62100
I've been there..I backed off and he had to really THINK about what he really wanted, and chose me. But if he is truly confused he can't and doesn't HAVE to think with her there...he gets the best of both worlds so long as he can turn to either one whenever he wants...by her backing off it forces him to deal with the real possibility of losing her and if he TRULY wants her back he won't let that happen.  |
Date: 9/4/2005 2:04:00 AM
From Authorid: 62915
OK I see what you are saying now but I guess it depends on the situation...  |