Date: 5/26/2005 2:32:00 PM
From Authorid: 37449
Im so unbelieveably angry at my parents right now I cant even look at this post!  |
Date: 5/26/2005 2:33:00 PM
From Authorid: 59418
I have a pretty good relationship with my mum..We don't generally argue over the state of my room   |
Date: 5/26/2005 2:33:00 PM
From Authorid: 62901
LoL... luckily even though I am a parent, I don't have to deal with this yet. I have a ways to go, but I can already see my frustrations are going to sound just like this.  |
Date: 5/26/2005 2:38:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
let it rip, Canuk! maybe you could give me some insight as to why she's so dang stubborn on this...  |
Date: 5/26/2005 2:39:00 PM
From Authorid: 24319
My father would lock my sister and I in our bedroom till we finished our room. Sometimes we even had to eat dinner in our room because we would just screw around in the bedroom and play with our toys, lol. It wasn't till the belt was pulled out that we decided to get busy.  |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:40:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
I don't know how it got this bad, DG... she was such a sweet baby, and now, at almost 9, she's gotten quite the attitude. I fear it's puberty rearing it's ugly head already... |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:42:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
She's past the spanking stage... besides that, if I even threaten it, she carries on like she's been beaten to within an inch of her life on a daily basis... It's unreal. |
Date: 5/26/2005 2:42:00 PM
From Authorid: 28848
This sort of sounds like my son and he's only 8...shudders. He screams and stomps around any time I ask him to do anything. I asked him today if he didn't realize how ridiculous he made himself look by doing that. LoL...I told him that he made himself look like a neanderthal or a caveman...which even more enraged him.. Good luck with your ordeal.  |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:44:00 PM
From Authorid: 24319
A quick funny story. One day my father had us in our room, the door wasn't locked though, cleaning it. Well, like usual we were just messing around in there, making paths from the door to the bed with our toys. We decided to go downstairs because we heard someone else down there besides our parents. It was my Uncle and he was holding a kitten. We thought he just got it and was bring it by to show my father and mother. So, my sister and I are asking him if we could keep it and all this stuff. My uncle says "Well, Aunt Elaine will be sad, but I'll tell you what. You go up there and clean your room spotless and I'll let you keep the kitten." Needless to say we hauled our butts up there and cleaned it in record time. Come to find out, it already was our cat, my mom had gotten it a few days earlier and it had been hiding. My uncle pulled a fast one on us. We were like 5 and 6 years old when this happened. I chuckle everytime I think about how it all played out. |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:44:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
LOL Realease me... we even had a little "talk" about expectations the other day. I explained that just like she expected to be fed when she's hungry, or to find clean clothes in her drawers, I expect her room to be cleaned when I ask. I'm not an ogre about it. We've been going around for almost a month this time.... and it's STILL not done. |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:46:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
Smart uncle! LOL Bribery doesn't work AT ALL on her. I wish it did. |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:46:00 PM
From Authorid: 24319
I have a cousin who was like that. I remember one time her mother just took her by the arm to put her in bed and she literally threw herself across the living room as if her mother had tried to rip her arm off. She also would practice her crying faces in the mirrors, lol. |
Date: 5/26/2005 2:49:00 PM
From Authorid: 16845
I always did the 'yeah yeah yeah' thing and got to it....eventually LOL...Ok I'm not Ms. Neat freak I admit it!  |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:53:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
I don't have a problem with her being a slow poke about it... it's the dragging it out for weeks on end that's getting on my last nerve! She ripped a feather pillow apart a couple weeks ago, and there are feathers floating all over the house. I vacuum them up and there's another layer waiting for me. I'll admit, I'm not exactly a neat-freak myself, but I do get to the point where the mess needs to be taken care of... and we are at that point now. |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:57:00 PM
From Authorid: 24319
How old is your daughter? |
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Date: 5/26/2005 2:59:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
she'll be 9 in September. |
Date: 5/26/2005 3:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 63044
LOL @ taking a rake to the room! I always tried to keep my room picked up because I had friends that had attrocious rooms and always wondered if they cared what other people thought when the ventured into the "unknown". LOL Now don't get me wrong, my house isn't "hospital" clean, but it isn't dingy. =)  |
Date: 5/26/2005 3:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 36901
When my mom said to clean my room (or told me to do anything else for that matter), I didn't ask questions and I didn't hesitate. We did what we were told because we had consequences if we didn't. Taking 15-30 minutes out of my time to clean my room was a lot better than getting grounded for 2 weeks.  |
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Date: 5/26/2005 3:25:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
I know what you mean... most times, the house isn't as clean as I'd like it to be, but I wouldn't be too humiliated if someone showed up unexpectedly. My neighbors kids were down the other day commenting onhow "clean" my house was (you can tell what they had for dinner every night last week when you visit them. eeewwww!), until they got to my daughter's room. They were even amazed at the mess... She wasn't the least bit embarrassed, either. |
Date: 5/26/2005 3:27:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
that's another thing... "Why?" I used to explain, but when my explainations began to be questioned, I started saying "Because I'm the mom and I said so!" I figue if I'm gonna get an arguement anyway, why not be the one to start it  |
Date: 5/26/2005 3:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 15394
Hey there... (Not the underage crowd..but) In our house, the children make a written contract of what they will do and and at what time it will be completed (negotiation with parents for this part of the deal). This includes weekly chores, daily chores and the bedroom situation. Then they make a WRITTEN list of punishments that will follow if the contract is not fulfilled (also negotiated with the parents) then no parental reminding is allowed. The key for this is to make sure that the jobs they have to do as punishment are the gross ones, like the toilet or scrubbing the shower. We also incorporated taking away make up and computer, phone and television. Also taking away the school dances etc are effective, but again key has been agreeing on everything ahead of time, and in writing and being consistent with follow through on MY part as the parent. I know when stuff will be done and they know what will follow if it is not done. The only thing I have to do at this point is enforce the already written punishments that they agreed to. I have found this to be VERY helpful all the way around. They are well aware of what is expected and they are also well aware that there are NO NEGOTIATIONS once it has been all agreed upon. I don't remind them, or go "easy" on them if the agreement is broken. Also for personal belongings left out in the "Commmon" areas of the house, they are taken and put somewhere out of sight and when the child wants it back they have to "Buy" it... cleaning the toilet, mowing the lawn, cleaning out the garbage cans etc is "payment" to get their stuff back GOOD luck!!!  |
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Date: 5/26/2005 3:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 15394
whoa... I wrote a book!! LOK |
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Date: 5/26/2005 3:43:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
oooh, Great ideas in there, Jungabel. We made up a schedule for what should be getting done when, a couple weeks ago but didn't include punishments for lack of follow through... good thinking! |
Date: 5/26/2005 3:43:00 PM
From Authorid: 3263
Ooh, now we know ALL about Little Jung! Bwahahah!!   |
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Date: 5/26/2005 3:44:00 PM
From Authorid: 15394
Shhhh lol don't tell !! LOL |
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Date: 5/26/2005 3:46:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
and I like your idea for their things left in my space, too! I've threatened that for years... I need to stop threatening and take some action! |
Date: 5/26/2005 5:39:00 PM
From Authorid: 46069
i feel your pain sista... i literally have to sit in their room and scream at the top of my lungs to get them to clean that room.  |
Date: 5/26/2005 6:59:00 PM
From Authorid: 62675
One time I put all my son's toys in garbage bags and had a freind come get them when he was sleeping. 2 months with no toys he no longer fights me when I say to clean up!! And he is only 6  |
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Date: 5/26/2005 7:14:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
I threw all of her toys out a second story window once.... she thought it looked like fun and helped me! |
Date: 5/26/2005 7:18:00 PM
From Authorid: 16069
My daughter cleans her room without a word about it. She knows better.  |
Date: 5/26/2005 7:34:00 PM
From Authorid: 14572
Hey Merc!! Unfortunately I too have the same problem with all of my kids.. Right down to the baby.. Who throws toys all over if we put him in his play pen.. He thinks its a big game to throw them out on the floor and watch me pick them up.. Granted he is just a baby... But my older kids know better..BOTH my girls are utter slobs.. I cant even go look in there rooms without wanting to scream. I almost feel like I have done something wrong in raising them.. Cause my house is ALWAYS as clean as I can possibly keep it. I have OCD when it comes to my house.. My parents raised us like that.. You could eat off of my mothers floors. And she made us keep our rooms like that too...There was never any in between with them. BUT, I had no where near the amount of things that my kids do. And I think that is where i went wrong.. They have wayyyy too much.. I do throw things away all the time.. And I dont care how much it cost me. If they cant take care of it, then they dont deserve it.. The girls also like to trail things out accross the rest of my house.. I tell them one time, to pick it up...if not they know that its going in the trash.. ONLY my 8 year old will go into the trash to retrive something once I leave the room.. lol..My oldest would rather die..lol.. She is almost 14.. I have already decided that when we actually move into the new house my 8 year old will only have a bed and her dresser in the room. NO toys or paper or anything of that nature.. Not until she learns how to take care of things... She is a troll I tell ya!! This kids can make one heck of a mess with one single piece of paper.. She shreddes it in to all these little pieces.. Just talking about this now, I wanna go wake her little but up and make her clean...lol..Good luck Merc!! And remember..we ARE good parents.. it's OUR kids that are BAD..LMAO!!!!  |
Date: 5/26/2005 7:40:00 PM
From Authorid: 7574
My mom gave up awhile back and just closed the door. She refuses to clean my room, because she puts stuff in weird places and then I get extremely mad. I like my organized mess.  |
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Date: 5/26/2005 8:04:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
I'm LMAO, Kathy.... with you, not at you! That bit about the paper is dead on with her, too! I don't know how she does it. She finally finished it and told me it's ready to be vacuumed. Anything left out will be thrown out. But what did it take to finally motivate her? Dinner |
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Date: 5/26/2005 8:07:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 10245
I do that to a point,Amers, but when it spills into my space, it's a problem that obviously can't be contained by a door Plus, we've got those old gravity vents (a hole in the floor of her room, ceiling of the living room with metal grating over it) and everything comes fluttering through... especially the contents of that pillow she gutted! |
Date: 5/26/2005 10:20:00 PM
From Authorid: 27046
My daughter is 8 and my son is 6. I take the broom (hardwood floors have this ONE benefit...LOL) and I sweep EVERYTHING into a huge pile in the middle of the room. I grab a book throw myself down on one of their beds and the room gets picked up pretty quick. If I leave the room they are in there for hours and when I "check in" cause they won't dare come out, the pile hasn't gotten any smaller and they've been goofing around. They don't goof when I am in there.  |
Date: 5/27/2005 1:39:00 AM
From Authorid: 63101
my brothers are 12 and 14. kenny(12) still wines about doing any work. i think it's the age..lol when i was little i got the wooden spoon or belt when i didn't listen:P maybe taking her time away will help, grounding her or no phone.. :P
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Date: 5/27/2005 3:02:00 AM
From Authorid: 28946
Mercury, I went through it and I understand what you are talking about. Home life would be so much nicer if children realized we don't enjoy acting the dictator part and how much it kills us inside when the kids think we enjoy hurting them. Too bad they don't realize our love for them untill they become adults. Great post.  |
Date: 6/7/2005 1:54:00 PM
From Authorid: 54406
My rooms always pretty clean, if its not, I clean it up pretty fast. I hate mess, my mom is messier than I am, so you should be asking how I get HER to clean up her mess. *sigh*  |
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Date: 6/7/2005 1:56:00 PM
From Authorid: 54406
Different things work for different people. my mom and I get along really well, so when she asks me to do something, she doesn't TELL me, but suggests it, and I almost always agree with her. I'm pretty responsible so I understand when soemthing needs to be done without having to be told most of the time. |
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Date: 6/7/2005 1:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 54406
Jungabel, your plan sounded great... All except the part about taking away the school dance. I think thats horrible, because they can never get that one night back, and I'm sure they would clean 10 toilets to be able to go to the dance. |
