Date: 3/9/2005 10:18:00 PM
From Authorid: 36704
depends on stuff like who bought what, whose name is on the title of the car etc.  |
Date: 3/9/2005 10:21:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
well her step dads name is still on the title of the car, but her clothes, jewlery, makeup and all that stuff is still at her house... her back pack and school stuff is still in her car... So she doesn't expect the car back...just her stuff  |
Date: 3/9/2005 10:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 12072
Could you call the police? What he did (beating her) has to be illegal, and she should be able to get her possessions back, at least the ones she paid for. As for quick money, I have no clue. Good luck, and I hope things get better!  |
Date: 3/9/2005 10:22:00 PM
From Authorid: 61946
Well First since she is 18 she can press charges against him. That would be the first thing I would do, then she should be able to have the cops go with her to get her things. If the tital to the car is not in her name then she probably wont be able to get that, but she can get her personal things. Hope things get better for you and her...Hugs  |
Date: 3/9/2005 10:22:00 PM
From Authorid: 62849
Ummm, the heck with worrying about money right now.. You need to go to authorities, for the sake of her little sister and mother. Obviously, the mother is afraid- she didn't want to see her daughter hurt, so she turned her head, but she didn't say or do anything, either. Does he hit her, too? It seems that could be the case. You need to talk to your father, SOON, and have him help you. Don't worry about whether or not it's legal to get her stuff back just yet- worry about the fact that it's illegal to beat another human being, and act on that worry as soon as you can. It's wonderful that you want to help your friend, but don't just help her run away from the problem, help her solve it so that her family is safe, too. Best of luck to you, and I mean that very sincerely. -Beags  |
Date: 3/9/2005 10:28:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
Well her mom has struck her a alot in the past too, I think the reason she didn't look is so she wouldn't be a witness she can simply say "I didn't see a thing" b/c this has happend before with her step dad and she sat there and has watched it before... I'm sure she'll have the marks on her face to prove it.. Its just hard not having a vehicle and her having school, me having work...things would be so much easier if we didn't live here.... See her Dad is totally going to be on her mothers side, which means her Grandpa which is in the law inforcement on the FBI side I believe totally agrees with everything and believes her mom and step dad over her....so I don't even think she stands a chance pressing charges!  |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:31:00 PM
From Authorid: 61946
If she has marks on her how are the cops gonna say that it didnt happen? And if they do keep making a fuss about it and eventually there will be a cop that is a "good cop" and will something about it. |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:32:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
I hope so, her face was all swollen tonight.. I felt so bad its just her Grandfather has a way with the people he knows in the authories ya know... This is just so hard! |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:35:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
Me too, Thanks for your replies guys |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:35:00 PM
From Authorid: 62849
Wow, that is really rough. It's so unfair sometimes. I hope you guys find help for her. -Beags |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:36:00 PM
From Authorid: 61946
Yes I do know...I have been in a situation similar to this. |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:37:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
Eryka... Its just so hard, it would be so much easier if I had my own place and a car... but I haven't been working at my current work long enough for any of that! |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:42:00 PM
From Authorid: 61946
I understand..I dont know what else to tell ya, but if you just wanna chat my window is always open....Hugs |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:44:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
Thanks Eryka, I appreciate it *big hugs* |
Date: 3/9/2005 10:46:00 PM
From Authorid: 36766
Whoa, he flipped out on her just because you were driving her car? Sounds like he might need to get on some medication.  |
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Date: 3/9/2005 10:49:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
Her real dad, step dad and mom are all like this.. just like last month her real dad threw her against his car b/c he disagrees with her life style... and her moms slapped her before and hit her... threw her... same as her step dad... She has a horrible "family" I guess you could say and the worst thing you could ever tell your child "Yah, you were definitely a MISTAKE"....yeah her moms told her that before...NUMEROUS times! |
Date: 3/10/2005 12:38:00 AM
From Authorid: 35808
Take pictures of her face and any other bruises or marks. Then take her in and press charges. Don't not do it just because her grandfather won't believe her. That's just an excuse. Go to the police, go to the social workers, go go go and keep pushing. You (or she) have to be firm, if they think they can just put you off, then they will, you have to let them know that your going to see this through, you have to DO it. Go to the police to report the assault. Then go to the Social Services and report the abuse. Rat on her mom, and her step dad, because they're going to be pissed and take it out on her little sister. But remember that YOU can't do this for her, she has to have the will to do it for herself, and if she doesn't, then maybe she deserves it. I know, it's mean...but I can't stand weak people.  |
Date: 3/10/2005 1:26:00 AM
From Authorid: 62915
I agree you have to go to the police. Defiantely take photographs! This makes me sick to hear how horrible some people are. If you go to the police I am sure they will help to get her stuff back... car probably wont happen but all her personal stuff she will be able to get. I wish you and her the best of luck *hugs* ghost-chick  |
Date: 3/10/2005 2:40:00 AM
From Authorid: 18516
Take photos of her injuries. Call the police, I'm sure you can get ahold of someone in the police department who can go with her to her house to get her belongings.  |
Date: 3/10/2005 3:50:00 AM
From Authorid: 23075
She needs to call the police. They can maybe help her get her own belongings back. I don't know what else to say..I've never been in a situation like this.....if I was I tell ya I'd be coming out swinging at anyone that hit me or shoved me...they get it back three times as hard as I got it...  |
Date: 3/10/2005 4:56:00 AM
From Authorid: 62872
The thing to watch is that if he (her father) is vendictive enough he could say you did that to her so she needs to file a report and get pics if you can get all the statements and evidence so that "if" he tries something like that you and your G/F have your backsides covered! I know how this kind of game is played so DONT wait for anything get everything taken care of TODAY!!!....
BEST WISHES AND GOOD LUCK....remember we ARE here if you need us OK?...hugs....Thunder Wolf  |
Date: 3/10/2005 5:17:00 AM
From Authorid: 12118
The poor girl. *sniffles* I feel horrible for her. If she really doesn't want to go back, and I must say I wouldn't blame her a bit if she didn't, she should wait until her step-dad is gone and go get her stuff. Odds are, if her mom didn't say anything while she watched her own flesh and blood get brutalized, she's not likely to say anything about getting her stuff. Unfortunately, the car won't be hers unless her name is on the title. If it's not, well, there's not alot you two can do. I also think that she should press charges against him for abuse, as that is exactly what he did. It actually sounds more like he all out BEAT her. The cops will help, believe it or not. I'm very sorry that she had to go through all of this, and you let her know that I'm praying for you both and I hope that everything works out. *huge hugs*  |
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Date: 3/10/2005 5:20:00 AM
From Authorid: 12118
Okay, I read about her grandfather. If you talk to an officer, make sure that her grandfather is to stay out of it. Just because he has clout in the office doesn't mean that he can use it in an abuse case. If so, he could be interfering with an investigation, which is *ding* unlawful. |
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Date: 3/10/2005 5:31:00 AM
From Authorid: 12118
And like Thunder Wolf said, take care of everything today before the marks start to fade and her step dad can come up with an excuse. |
Date: 3/10/2005 10:27:00 AM
From Authorid: 16845
Forget about material posessions and call the police...someone like that deserves a nice small cell..  |
Date: 3/10/2005 10:44:00 AM
From Authorid: 53284
She needs to call the police and press changes. Her step dad assualted her. He cannot take her stuff. Call the police.  |
Date: 3/11/2005 6:59:00 PM
From Authorid: 4144
first of all she should press charges for him beating her. it sounds like the car may be titled to him and he is paying the insurance. if so, you shouldn't have ever driven the car the first time let alone all the time. she should get the law involved and get help getting out of there. the police can go to the house with her while she removes her personal belongings. as for the car, with her being 18, chances are it is not legally hers. my daughter is 20 and her car is titled to her dad and me. we had the same rules.....no boyfriends or friends driving the car. if she gets sick she can call us and we will pick her and the car up. she actually "lost" her car for anything besides school and work a few years ago for letting her boyfriend sneak and drive. like it or not, the parents make the rules about the vehicles. and we are not obligated to give our kids cars to do with as they please. as far as her mother goes, that woman is sick. what kind of mother watches some man beat her kid? your girlfriend needs to get away from both of them ASAP! and her younger sister needs to be taken out of that home cause if she's not being beat she will soon enough. good luck on helping her out.  |
Date: 3/12/2005 3:56:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 36687
Okay heres my update for anyone who decides to read this again... We did talk to a police officer.... he said that more then likely it would be hard to get her clothes and stuff b/c technicially noone knows who bought what... unless she kept sales reciepts of course.. but.. Heres the deal with the car... she drove a Saturn.. they bought it for her a couple of yrs ago..it got totalled out when some girl rear ended her....The insurance was in HER name..and she paid it the whole time she had the car... now the INSURANCE bought the new Escort she was driving...but the title was in her Step dads name... probably b/c she wasn't 18 yet... She still continued to have the INSURANCE in her name as well as she paid it...but it was definitely the INSURANCE company that paid for the escort...not her parents... but anyhow, The cop said he'd take care of everything.. he must have talked to him or something b/c at her Musical last night her parents actually had nerve to come! and of course all I got was dirty looks.... I'm surprised he didn't say anything to me, b/c I wouldn't have cared so much...Scene or no scene I would have spoken my opinion right back! But now shes stayin with me... my dad okay'd it... So... right now were working on getting another car... bought her some new clothes to last until we can actually somehow get the rest of her stuff back.. Oh we will  heh.. Thanks everyone for the replies! |
Date: 3/20/2005 5:47:00 PM
From Authorid: 35825
Good luck sweetie...and I'm glad you guys contacted the police. Hang in there!  |
