Life's Bearer ---ice

“I was searching high and low,
Searching very hard for…
I honestly don’t know,
But I do know it would soon show.

My heart throbs beats of hunger,
Anticipating on this moment any longer…
And I’m afraid I would soon have to surrender,
Or fall victim to my own frustrations and anger.

Though I remained searching high and low,
Searching for something I did not know.
Foolish it sounds, asking why would I go…
The length I go…the reason I really don’t know.”

He seems tired of life and everything it brought,
As if knowledge he had too much been taught.
Now he drenches himself with tears of hope that…
Maybe a dream catcher is set, so he may be caught.

Shrugged down on the floor he weeps,
Confused to why the stars only appear when he sleeps.
To the window in his room he secretively creeps,
Undesired memories his soul mentally reaps.

“The times I thought I had it worse,
O’ the times I so for viciously thirst.
My curse bestowed upon me from birth…
Nature for I call…O’ Nature why I, do you not nurse?

Am I of not your children?
Why is happiness from me ridden?
And my hopes of a better living…
Why these hopes do you shyly remain hidden?

Liberty from this agonized world I seek,
Upon this cursed ground, my legs walk weak.
I apologize my mother if my tone sounds bleak…
But mother…oh from my eyes, in bitter drips my screams leak.

I wish for a better day far from here,
A place where I may not fall to shed a tear…
A tear filled with horrible sounds for all to hear,
I pray that if this tear ever fell, to hell it would near.”

Adore the hurt from this world he feels,
Adore the pain he so bravely deals.
Calling upon relief so that his wound heals…
Before his star viewed window he sadly kneels.

His sweaty palms over one another,
His cracked heart starts to beat faster.
Now he prepares to say his grace…
“Lord only you I praise…my almighty master.

Though my emotions are unbearable for a man,
These dreadful feelings I cope with as much as can.
For if this was all destined, one question I ask then…
Why must I hold the unwanted broken plan?

I do my neighbors as I would do upon my own form,
I have never caused one single spirit to ever weep nor mourn.
O’ my Lord…I wish I was never born…
I wish my birth never shown…wish that my first pages had been torn.

Yet I pray once more for a way to escape this era,
So that life that I hold would no longer grip nights of terror…
Followed by mornings dreaded with eyes wetter,
O’ Answer me…Am I blessed a shepherd or damned as life’s bearer?”

---S.B.
ice

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