Date: 1/13/2005 10:30:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 62766
I said I went to the gym every week I ment everyday. The difference is I'm never home and I dont see how I'm lazy. I wish I could be |
Date: 1/13/2005 10:33:00 AM
From Authorid: 46527
Looks like it's time to move out. Given time apart you'll probably get along better. |
Date: 1/13/2005 10:43:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 62766
I honestly can not move out. Theres no way I could afford it. I'm just stuck so badly |
Date: 1/13/2005 10:53:00 AM
From Authorid: 30747
Your mom sounds like she has some serious issues going on. I'm almost willing to bet it has nothing to do with you personally. She is not happy in her life and probably likes blaming you, directly and indirectly. In any case, she is some what imbalanced and you have two choices. Deal with it until you can get out on your own or make choices in your life that will allow you to get out on your own NOW. You are 18 years old. You do not have to spend any time with her at all or have her in your life where she can continue to humiliate and degrade you. There is no arguing with your mother. There is no changing your mother. Now is the time to move on and away from it. By the way, that humiliation she did to you in front of your boss only made HER look bad, not you. |
Date: 1/13/2005 11:02:00 AM
From Authorid: 62917
Thats horrible, Im sorry she treats you that way. No body deserves that sort of treatment. Especially from a parent!! I agree with independant. Time to say adios! Keep your chin up |
Date: 1/13/2005 11:22:00 AM
From Authorid: 35808
Maybe you could move in with some friends and split the rent, or what about school housing? Do you have any family members that you get along with? Like a brother/sister, or an aunt or a cousin? The problems your having right now, they can be crippling, you might get stuck where you are if you don't leave now. She is being abusive, and just because your 18 doesn't make it acceptable. |
Date: 1/13/2005 11:30:00 AM
From Authorid: 8905
I think you should look for your own place. I moved out for a year cause of my mom and grandma... I came back eventually, and our relationships are better, but it was because I moved that made all of relize that we truely do love each other ya know? |
Date: 1/13/2005 11:32:00 AM
From Authorid: 8905
If you start saving now... you should be able to move out eventually. And do look for friends, or in your paper for rooms for rent, or people looking for roomates. Rooms for rent are cheaper then the usual apartment, and if you are lucky, you can make some really cool friends. |
Date: 1/13/2005 11:34:00 AM
From Authorid: 13119
Its ironic that your name tag is "independant forever" and yet..... Anyways, if your mom is belittling you in front of others correct her in front of them as well. When she said that to the lady at McDs you should have said, "I am sorry, its not that I am being difficult its that she doesn't pay attention when I speak" Turn it around on her and as for fat, you aren't, maybe mommy dearest is jealous. |
Date: 1/13/2005 12:18:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 62766
haha I usually do say something back at her but in a sweet revenging kind of way. You could tell the look that the lady gave was like "jeeze Lady" I was just hurt because I knew it was coming the big fight because I asked for coffee instead. I was just talking to my friend Jen and We are going to see what we can do about spliting a rent. The roomate thing I would like to do, but Ive only seen offers in bad neighborhoods. I'm checking out apts now. Hopefully I can find one. It just makes me so angry because I want to finish school and I'm honestly not ready to move out. I mean I'm ready but emotionally I'm not ready. |
Date: 1/13/2005 12:22:00 PM
From Authorid: 46527
Sometimes we don't ever get to the point where we feel emotionally ready for something....until we try it. |
Date: 1/13/2005 1:50:00 PM
From Authorid: 63011
I think she treats you that way because she is unhappy with herself, and she's trying to drag you down with her. You shouldnt have to take that from her. I think it's time to move out. What about getting a roommate? It would be easier to afford that way. Anyway, I'm sorry you have to go through that. I hope everything works out for you. -GreenClover |
Date: 1/13/2005 2:10:00 PM
From Authorid: 13119
try a house rent instead of apartment maybe it would be cheaper for you. |
Date: 1/13/2005 3:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 47218
the problem may be the two of you living under one roof, with you on the verge of adulthood attempting to assert your independence. Coming into your own is, unfortunately, often a very unpleasant experience. Parents have a hard time accepting that their children are no longer their babies, kids resent the control from their parents, and when the tensions get high, people have the unfortunate tendency of saying really ugly things about one another that they don't mean. I think the best thing to do is realize that you are locked a battle of wills with your mother. You can try to talk to her about it-- but try the non-confrontational approach. This entails avoiding sentences with the accusative "you," and using lots of "I feel like" and "it seems like" sentences-- example: "it seems to me sometimes like you say things to intentionally embarass me in front of other people, and it makes me feel very bad." But also keep saving up for your own residence. I have seen many mother/daughter relationships DRASTICALLY improve after the kids got their own place. |
Date: 1/13/2005 3:56:00 PM
From Authorid: 12118
My mother's the EXACT same way. I moved out because I couldn't take it anymore..I'm sorry that you have to go through this, but if you ever need to talk, I'll always understand and my PM is ALWAYS open. *hugs* |
Date: 1/13/2005 4:05:00 PM
From Authorid: 62915
I agree with soul drifter. I think it is she who has the problem and its not you. I wish you the best! Ghost-chick |
Date: 1/14/2005 9:40:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 62766
Thanks alot guys. |
Date: 1/21/2005 8:20:00 PM
From Authorid: 53961
Could she be going through the change or has she always been this way? |
Date: 1/23/2005 10:44:00 AM
From Authorid: 18516
A size 12 is fat?! HA! Your not fat. I agree with soul drifter, I think your mom has some issues she needs to work out and she should probably look into seeing someone. Had I been in your shoes I think I would have blown up personally. Turn her words around, if she can deal it then she can take it. |