Ok, for the most part, my life is great. I have a beautiful one year old son, who happens to be the light of my life. I'm seeing a wonderful guy. He's great to both me and my son. And he's sooooo gorgeous!!!! Italian with wonderfully curly, jet black hair. Trust me, any woman would kill for his hair. LOL I have a wonderful family (for the most part) that is very supportive of me. But, like most people, I have my problems and quirks. And, unfortunately, sometimes it boils over until I can't handle this stuff on my own anymore. This happens to be one of those times.
Until the middle of July, I had a job. It wasn't a good job, or even that fun. But if it was, I guess it wouldn't be work, right??? I made $4 an hour, waiting tables at one of the truck stops. It was just enough to pay rent and have a little extra spending cash. A co-worker (also the guy I'm currently seeing) was picking me up every night on the way to work, since I don't have a car. Well, one night he didn't show up. So I was REALLY upset at him. Not having a phone, I couldn't exactly call in and see what was going on. And I was not knocking on a neighbors door at 11 pm to use thier phone. About a week later, he showed up and told me that my supervisor had called him on his cell phone and told him he didnt need to pick me up cuz I had called her and said I would not be back to work. I guess I told her to do things we're not allowed to say on this site. So because of this person, I no longer have a job. She even forged a note from me. I've seen it. The sig soooo does not match mine. So, problem # one. I am due to pay rent ($680) and I have NNNNOOOOO money to pay it. I'm facing eviction, and I can't do anything about it. BTW, my rent is not $680, it's $450 but I still owe $230 from July. Problem # 2??? I have no money!!! I can't buy diapers for my kid. Thank god I have food stamps, or he wouldn't have any milk or bread or any of that stuff. My kid's dad is worthless. He's not paying child support. They've told him to pay or go to jail, but he refuses to get a job. Not that 200 bucks a month would pay my rent, but it would sure help. Also, I had to kick my mom out of my apartment, because she's NUTZZZZ !!!!!!!!! I think she's using again, but I can't prove it. The only thing I have to go on is her poopy attitude. She was yelling at my son, calling him a stupid peice of poo, and a brat, and she tried to hit him. The day I kicked her out, she punched me in the face!!!!! And yet Im the one that's wronged her. I'm a terrible child for throwing my mother on the street. And everyone believes her!!! So now I can't ask any of our friends for money. I can't ask my family because there isn't much of one. The family I do have left, is broke. My Grandma lives off of SSI, and my aunt is in the process of a divorce, and has no extra money. I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose my son, but it's starting to look like I'm going to have to find someone to take care of him for me. I don't want to do that. I want him with me. It breaks my heart that I've had to sit down and think of who the best caretaker would be. But what else am I supposed to do??? I even tried to get rental assistance thru a couple of agencies here, but the funds are either gone, or I don't qualify, or I just plain cant get assistance for some reason or other. It seems like I'm hitting a brick wall. My life was going sooo well. All of a sudden, things have taken this downward spiral and I don't kknow how to pick it back up. I've turned in about 30 applications, I call the places back, hounding them fora job. But noone has offered me anything yet. I keep hoping I'll get that job today. And no job is ever given. The most heartbreaking thing of all of this??? It was my son's first birthday last Thursday. I didn't even have money to get him a cake, or throw him a party. Or even get him a present. I know he's only one, so he doesnt know any better, but I do. And that's an empty spot in the baby book. When he's older and lookin in his baby book and sees that, do I tell him, "oh, we were too poor. We lived in poverty and i couldnt afford to get you even a cupcake with a candle in it???" Ok, so now I'm done venting for a little while. I will try to keep everyone posted. The other night, I asked God to send me an angel worth $1000.00 so I could just maybe get ahead a little bit. Maybe he'll listen??? I can only hope so at this point. Short of a miracle, I dont' know what's going to make this right. You can join Unsolved Mysteries and post your own mysteries or
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Have you thought about asking your landlord if there is anything you can do for them in exchange for rent until you get back on your feet? Start contacting churches or any other organization that will listen. Sometimes the best way to get a job is from someone who knows someone. Hound the welfare office! Call and keep calling, you need help and that is what they are there for. As far as missing your sons birthday, I did with mine too. We had his birthday a few weeks late and he never knew the difference ( I know you do, but you can only do what you can). I know things are hard and everything looks bleek but dont give your baby up, you will make it I know you will! *huge hugs* 
And dont feel bad about your sons birthday. I know how you feel and like you said he wont remember it. When my son was born we were living with my inlaws, neither of us had a job, and we were on food stamps. I had worked until he was born but didnt make enough for us to be able to save any back for when I had to be on leave. We were pretty much dirt poor until about 5 years ago. So alot of crummy birthdays and Christmas's went by. We would make stupid traditions up, just so we could get by with a smile atleast. Like giving someone a gift that they had given you the year before... crazy stuff like that LOL I hope everything works out for you and if you need someone to talk to, my PM box is a click away! 
