NEW OFFICE WORDS FOR 2004.........SmoknJokes

NEW OFFICE WORDS FOR 2004 - Essential additions for the workplace vocabulary:

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves. (Hmmm sounds familiar)

SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end....(LOSER)

CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles. (thats everywhere here)

PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (now thats funny but true)

MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.(I am not wired thank you very much)

SITCOMs: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. (Who can do this ???)

STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiney. (thats what I am saying!!!)

SWIPEOUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use. (ummm thats happened to me)

XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.( whatever)

IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example. (ok)

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again. (that would never happen here)

ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. (AMEN)

404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. (You people know who you are!!)

GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, subdivisions... (Once again AMEN to that)

OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (I know we have all been there)

WOOFYS: Well Off Older Folks.

CROP DUSTING: Surreptitiously farting while passing thru a cube farm, then enjoying the sounds of dismay and disgust. (I love to do this) =========

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