I am not much into consumer magazines but I love to read the Reader's Digest. I just had to share a few of these jewels with you :D Hope you Enjoy! Take Care!
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Car Accidents are not always easy to explain, as evidenced by the following insurance form statements written & submitted by the unlucky drivers themselves
*Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
*I thought my window was down but I found out it was up when I put my head through it.
*In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
*The interect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
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With Five kids at home & one more on the way, I wasn't quite sure what to think when I was assigned the follwoing password for my computer at work: iud4u
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I'd been hauling garbage for years so when the sign Garbage appeared on a trash can, I replaced it with my own note "After 20 years on the job, I know garbage when I see it!" I emptied the can and left. The next week, a new note appeared on the same can: "Dear Professor Trash, the garbage can is the garbage!"
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Following an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother, eight noisey and shoving siblings and I arrived in Germany. "Do you have any weapons or illegal drugs in your possession?" the customs agent asked my weary mother.
"Sir,"she said while separating my brother & me, "if I had either of those items, I would have used them by now"
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We were asleep in our cots at Bagram Air Force Base when exploding enemy rockets woke us up. My platoon and I threw on our fatigues, grabbed our weapons, and ran to the bunker for protection. Inside the bunker, one nevous solider lit up.
"Put that cigerette out!" I ordered.
"Yeah, foget the rockets said another solider as more rounds rocked the bunker. "That second hand smoke'll kill ya"
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Due to increasing product liability litigation, it has been suggested that American liquir manufacturers place these warning labels immediately on all varieties of alcohol.
WARNING: The consumption of alchohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
WARNING: The consumption of alchohol may cause you to tell your friends over & over that you love them.
WARNING: The consumption of alchohol may cause you to think you can sing.
WARNING: The consumption of alchohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
WARNING: The consumption of alchohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you.
**************** Hope these gave ya a Chuckle :D Take Care ALL!
Sara aka Akua Tuta
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