Date: 2/16/2004 7:26:00 AM
From Authorid: 15677
oh huny Im so sorry Just love him is all I can say and try to spend time with him. My grandfather did the same thing.  |
Date: 2/16/2004 7:46:00 AM
From Authorid: 3688
Take it one day at a time and enjoy every minute you can with him, although you're expecting it and preparing yourself, nothing will prepare you for that final moment. Although it hurts, he's probably grown tired of fighting something that is inevitable. We never want to see our parents as anything but immortal..we want them to live forever and always be strong but sadly, it's not the case, and all we can do is build good memories to remember our loved ones by.  |
Date: 2/16/2004 7:55:00 AM
From Authorid: 58611
I have to agree with what the others have said. You can try to find ways to prepare yourself, and even think that you are prepared, but I dont think any of us ever are truley ready to let a loved one go. But just make the best of what little time is left with him, make sure he knows how much you love him.  |
Date: 2/16/2004 8:08:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15777
It's so hard for me to tell him seriously how much I love him. My father is not really a emotional person and in most cases we make humar a way of expressing our love. I would like to be serious with him and let him know how much he means to me but I can't even get the words out without getting all choked up. It's so hard. My father and I have always had a trying relationship. We were never close until after his heart attack. It's been some long hard years of catch up. It's been wonderful to tell him I love him and have him actually tell me loves me back. I just feel like so much time has been wasted and gone. Seems like when the good times get better the bad times come sooner. Thank you all  |
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Date: 2/16/2004 8:10:00 AM
From Authorid: 3688
If you can't say it without getting choked up try writing him a letter boofy..bonus of that is you can make sure it's exactly what you want to say before you give it to him. |
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Date: 2/16/2004 8:21:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15777
Thanks dreamer..that's a great idea! *hugs* |
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Date: 2/16/2004 8:24:00 AM
From Authorid: 3688
anytime hon *hugs* I learned a lot from the mistakes I made with my own dad, and I think that sharing what I learned with others helps me heal... |
Date: 2/16/2004 8:47:00 AM
From Authorid: 11341
Sweety you can never prepare yourself. You can think you are, but youre not. The best thing I can tell you is make sure you tell him everything you need to tell him. Say it, write it, sing it, just let him know. I will keep you in my thoughts. *hugs*  |
Date: 2/16/2004 9:58:00 AM
From Authorid: 3263
Tell him you love him. Do it now while you still can. I wish I could rewind time to before my mom died, and say so many things...  |
Date: 2/16/2004 10:46:00 AM
From Authorid: 8024
loves test is time a strongest bond between a father and child tell him everything you've felt and feel ... know too when his time comes it is his not yours ... his choice to choose to prolong living or not .... love him throughout .. no matter what he chooses ...  |
Date: 2/16/2004 11:01:00 AM
From Authorid: 17275
Aw Boofy I am sorry this is happening. Unfortunately there is nothing we can do to change others. He must enjoy his smoking ect and is not willing to change not matter what the cost. There is no way to prepare oneself for the inevitable. My mom fought cancer for 4 years and when she passed away last May it was still a shock. All I can say is cherish the times you do have together. ((hugs)).  |
Date: 2/16/2004 11:55:00 AM
From Authorid: 53284
I think that you should prepare yourself for the worst. He knows his state of health yet continues to abuse his body. That is his choice, so I don't think that you need to feel guilt about that. I would schedule some special time with him and just let him know how much you appreciate the time that you've had together. (A little daughter guilt may get him to improve his life style a little) Then, you should ask him point blank if there is anything that he wants/needs you to take care of once he's gone.  |
Date: 2/16/2004 2:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 62367
Spend time with your Dad. Tell him you love him each time you see him, it may be easier and seem more natural if you say if when you leave. If you have difficulties with your father, this is the time to make up. I know what you are going through. I let my father go many years ago. My problem was accepting that he was tired and wanted to die while I wanted him to live.  |
Date: 2/16/2004 3:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 48250
Personally I think You should show him this Post, Let him Know How Your truly feel, don't hide it from him, let him know that You do not want to Lose him, and that You surely will if he doesn't take in to serious consideration, his very serious health problems. But as far as Preparing Yourself for a Loss of a Loved One., there's really not any way to Prepare Yourself, you may know that it is inevitable, especially with his neglect of his health,and the signs of his declining health., but still yet you can never really be prepared to lose Someone even if you know the end for them is Coming.. I Hope you let him see Your post, maybe it will serve as a Wake up call for him.. I wish You and Your Family the Very Best and My Prayers are with You....T/C.....  |
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Date: 2/17/2004 7:04:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 15777
Thank you all for your support and advice...such good things here and I'm going to listen..I promise. Sometimes I forget how many caring people we have here. What a great place to find love and support...you all are the best. |
