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Date: 1/20/2004 11:57:00 AM
From Authorid: 12133
I think as long as they are spanked on their butts, with an open hand, and within limits. Yes, I believe it should definitely be allowed.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 11:58:00 AM
From Authorid: 59876
i swat my son if he needs it. such as doing something dangerous like playing with plugs or outlets. there is a vast difference between a swat and a beating.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:00:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 32133
but are people gonna get spanked when there 13 years old?  |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:07:00 PM
From Authorid: 46530
The problem with this issue is that it depends on the age and maturity of the child. Young children do not necessarily understand even a reasonable arguement against what they are doing, so sometimes a smack on the backside is the only way. As the child grows up and can understand more then it becomes less effective. Therefore people can fall into the trap of hitting ever harder and this is child abuse. Speaking as one who was removed from my parents due to my father doing this I speak from a family broken by such acts  |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 58611
I see nothing wrong with spanking children on thier backside when in need of discipline, but there is a fine line between discipline and abuse. I know of a lot of parents who are afraid to spank thier kids nowdays,instead they put them on pills to control thier behavior which seems to be making things worse.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 59418
i have not been smacked by my parents since i was about 6 years old...a telling off has always been enough to make me cry and learn my lesson, not to do it again, or at least not get caught   |
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Date: 1/20/2004 12:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 59418
instead of hurting them physically, why not just not let them watch tv, or do the things they like doing whenever they misbehave? |
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Date: 1/20/2004 12:25:00 PM
From Authorid: 62408
I think you're walking a fine line here. Which is good, since this fits appropriately into the 'debate' category. I only recall a few occasions where my parents hit me. On one such occasion (this I know about only through story, as I was too young to remember) I was still in diapers, and becoming cranky and irritable, and rightly misbehaving, so my father gave me a swat on the behind, with a flat palm. <keep in mind I had a diaper on, so plenty of extra padding, it was more so to get my attention than anything else>. My grandfather, (the one who I made the memoriam to) was present, and did not speak to my father for over a week. As the youngest grandchild in the family, and the only one he got to see grow up practically on a daily basis from birth to adulthood, he was very protective. Even though in his day, he would discipline his own children with belt, paddle, etc. Although granted, back then, somehow it was more socially accepted, even though it didn't make it right. The only other times I remember being 'hit' were a few occasional open-palmed swats on the behind. Never in public, though. My usual 'punishments' consisted of making me go to bed early, so I'd miss my favorite TV shows, no dessert if we went out to dinner, or not going out to dinner at all, little things like that. I was never really punished by not being allowed to go to a friends house or have a friend come over, if the date was already set up, because my parents didn't believe it was fair to punish the friend as well. As for your topic, I don't think parents should be allowed to hit their children. Especially in todays society when things can get so easily blown out of proportion. But time-outs and things like that aren't always effective either. Depending on the age of the child, like a toddler, I think a slight swat on the behind isn't too bad, so long as no real force is used...more as an attention getting matter. What irks me is walking through stores and hearing screaming children, then seeing there parents dragging them along swearing at them worse than words I've heard in R-rated movies. And for no apparant reason. I saw a little girl fall once, and scrape her knee...it was bleeding, and her mom just told her to shut the (bleep) up or she'd have a bloody lip, too. The girl was about 6 or 7. I stayed nearby, and when the girl finally got permission to go to the bathroom, I followed (I always carry band-aids in my purse, being a born klutz). I cleaned her knee up, and sent her back out...and told her just to tell her mom that someone gave her a band-aid if she were to ask. I probably shouldn't have interfered, but it was just a band-aid. There was one other time...I found a lost kid in the mall... he was scared to death...and people were just ignoring him. I carefully approached him so as not to frighten him, and got his name, age, etc. Something in him trusted me, because I got him to go with me to the security booth/customer service. He didn't want me to leave him...so I bought us sodas at a nearby stand and we sat on a sofa and waited. First thing that happened when the parents showed up is they started hitting him instead of hugging him. I grabbed the kid and put my body between us, just as security grabbed them. Don't know what happened after that. For although I gave a statement, I decided to remain anonymous. The last thing I'll comment on that I think that belongs in this category is kids on leashes. That irritates me, too. Big time. Leashes are for pets, not your children. If you want to shop without having to look after your child constantly, hire a babysitter; or drop them off at the malls child-care center for a few hours, most malls have them now. Don't put your kid on a leash. Concluding, if you have to discipline your kids, and you feel it comes down to hitting them, do so with an open palm, and do not use a lot of force, its not the force you need for the affect, you need to get their attention...the shock factor (in my opinion). Never hit with any objects (belt, paddle, etc) or a closed fist. But that's just my opinion. --Christine-3  |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:31:00 PM
From Authorid: 58078
As long as they don't beat them, I see nothing wrong with it. When I was younger we got the belt....lol. I think now a days a good kick to the butt is just fine.  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 12:34:00 PM
From Authorid: 12133
I remember getting spanked with a belt. But I think the ride home, knowing we were going to get it, when we got there, was worse. |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:43:00 PM
From Authorid: 42259
I agreed with you right up until the part about giving them a good smack in the face. I think it's ok to give a kid a swat on the behind if they "really" deserve it,but never,never should a kid be hit in the face or the head. It is so dangerous.My dad knows a guy whose father hit him in the head when he was a kid and it hurt something in his brain so that now he's in an institution.  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 12:54:00 PM
From Authorid: 42259
Christine, I totally agree with your reply, except on the last part, about leashes.I agree it looks bad, it's demoralizing, but they have their place. When my sister was around 2-3 she was one of those kids that ran around and she was kind of spacey-you'd tell her to stay put and the next minute she'd start to wander off-basically,she was too young to remember the rules. We didn't use the leash when we went to the grocery store ,park,etc. But when we travelled that year- just me and my mom and I was pretty young then- we used it.Mostly when,say, my mom had to stand in line at the check in counter and I had to watch the luggage AND a toddler determined to run around. Right after we took it off.And we only did it for her safety because losing a child anywhere nowdays is terrifying! So in certain circumstances it has it's uses. |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:54:00 PM
From Authorid: 61897
"But I think the ride home, knowing we were going to get it, when we got there, was worse"-lol, too funny. As for spanking your kids, I not only think it's okay, but sometimes necessary. Kids NEED discipline. I am not talking about whooping them unconscious, that's just plain abuse, but like others said, mainly to get their attention. BELIEVE ME, it deters them from doing it again and/or makes them think twice next time, before doing something similar.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 12:55:00 PM
From Authorid: 36967
that is the Problem with America today, and why we have so much crime. Kids are not being raise to respect the Authority today, and many cases, not allowed to. That is why society is messed up. |
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Date: 1/20/2004 12:56:00 PM
From Authorid: 42259
Also,it was a wrist leash not the other kind. |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:00:00 PM
From Authorid: 43807
i think i should use a lease on my kid, i dont want some pervert getting em. But at the same time its kind of mean. so i dont know. be mean, or lose a kid. hmm. well. i did fine without one. so.. hmm.  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 1:00:00 PM
From Authorid: 61897
Like I've said in other debates concerning this, kids I know (who are grown now) who never got hit as kids, are the ones who grew up so outta control that THEY ended up putting THEIR hands on their parents. Also notice how kids today are, so disrespectful and mouthy, you see these dumb moms on tv talking about how they can't control their sons/daughters and then you always have people say they wouldn't even DARE do that when they were growing up because their parents wouldn't have put up with it. That's the way it should be. |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:02:00 PM
From Authorid: 18527
I think child leashes are wonderful... my mom had us on leashes and I will have my kids on them too. I'd rather have it look kind of bad than have my child abducted.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:14:00 PM
From Authorid: 53961
No. I use to when I was younger and knew no different. I have since learned that there are other ways to discipline. Violence breeds violence.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:15:00 PM
From Authorid: 54570
Hey I think its ok. My parents and thier parents before them used whatever was at hand or a belt or switch to punish a child that got out of line. And if you dont believe me look at the older generation. Those old folks arent the ones in jail or beating thier wifes. They werent the ones stealing or toting guns to school. But yes it is ok as long as you dont abuse them. A visit to the woodshed is a heap of better medicine for the young than a time out. Or when I was growing up they said if you punished a child it would warp his personality. When I done something wrong my parents warped a part of me and believe me it wasnt my personality.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 62367
I believe in corporal punishment, an occasional spanking or slap if its really necessary. Some kids don't need this, they respond to "time outs" and "grounding". There are a whole lot of others who would need the extra reinforcement on the "seat of learning". One version of child raising and punishment does not fit every child and every situation.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 56864
I believe the occasional swat on the rear might be good, or maybe a little dig of the nails (finger nails, not steel nails) into a child's arm is acceptable. My dad sometimes went overboard, and I vividly remember being hit more than once for doing not much. However, my mom might slap one of us on the head for doing something major, but if it gets too bad my dad'll get a little out of hand...  |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:22:00 PM
From Authorid: 50678
no no and no!!!!!!  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 1:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 50678
I mean if you are saying, hitting them on the butt when they did something wrong, that is different then hitting them. the butt thing is ok but anything alse isn't. I would never hit my kids when I have them, even on the butt. If you have to hit your kids to disapline(sp) them your not smart or good parents, there are other was to disapline(sp) them. |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:53:00 PM
From Authorid: 56074
Ok, my sister's 2 older sons were taken away from her for child endangerment (not for physical abuse, her ex did drugs, left needles around the house, and was dangerous and she wouldn't leave him) well my parents got guardianship of the younger of the 2 boys. DFS comes by every some often to make sure we aren't hitting them and if there are any reports of my parents spanking them, even as discipline, then he and my youngest nephew can be taken away from us. Personally, I believe the government needs to stay out of the lives of families, let them raise their own children, and that way families stay together. I bet most of those who enforce not spanking children (DFS/government) probably spank their own kids.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:56:00 PM
From Authorid: 25756
I agree with Christine-3 on this one. I hate seeing kids being hit for no good reason...and they shouldn't be hit with a lot of force. As for the leashes thing...my mom used to have one for me when I was about 3-4 I remember taking walks with her with one. I always thought they were fun! Lol!  |
Date: 1/20/2004 1:59:00 PM
From Authorid: 1065
Well, to be very honest i think to some extent that parents should hit thier kids. When i was little my mother would hit every so often and i think the only time that she actually got out of hand was once...and i ended up with a gash on my forehead, i think that if parents can control their anger and not go overboard, than its ok...but as to leave bruises and things like that...NOOOO!  |
Date: 1/20/2004 2:01:00 PM
From Authorid: 9130
Spanking is a great way to disipline children and more parents should do it. Hitting isn't the same thing.  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 2:02:00 PM
From Authorid: 56074
Spirits of the Light, not all kids will behave if given other forms of discipline. Just because you swat a child on the butt for doing something bad doesn't make you a bad parent. It just shows the child that what they did is wrong. Unless you hit them hard or do it many times. That *is* wrong. |
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Date: 1/20/2004 2:04:00 PM
From Authorid: 12133
Um, my parents spanked us, as we were growing up, and they were VERY good parents, thank you. I spank my son, and I am also a very good parent, thank you very much! |
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Date: 1/20/2004 2:08:00 PM
From Authorid: 12133
And SOTL, that's like trying to give advice on how to play golf, when you've never played it yourself. |
Date: 1/20/2004 2:32:00 PM
From Authorid: 43214
I agree w/ Paula's comment "Violence breeds violence." My parents used to discipline my brothers and oldest sister by "belting" them, and when they got older they were very violent towards eachother and other people. But, they never laid a finger on my sister or I and neither of us ever had a violence problem. In my opinion, I don't agree with hitting or spanking children for discipline or any other reason. **huggs**  |
Date: 1/20/2004 2:34:00 PM
From Authorid: 30747
Oh no no no no. A smack in the face? No!!! There is a time for spanking but a snack in the face is a little too much. *cringe* When spanking is done the way it is supposed to then it can be affective but hauling off and hitting a kid for what ever reason only promotes more violence in the young. They can't hit an adult back to take out the anger of the humiliation so who are they going to hit? Someone smaller and weaker. No! I don't condone this at all.  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 2:39:00 PM
From Authorid: 12133
My 2 sisters and I got spanked when we were younger, and none of us are violent, so, just because as person is spanked doesn't mean they will turn violent. Its only been recently, that spanking a child was even questionable. |
Date: 1/20/2004 2:55:00 PM
From Authorid: 17014
There is a difference between hitting and spanking. Hitting is wrong, I think it's abuse- spanking is usually just reprimand for wrong doings, and I mean with your hand and not a belt or any other object.  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 3:41:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 32133
im not spanked lol i get a good smack in the face 2 or 3 times and then i get grounded like people usually do.....i dont think anything is wrong with it.....i got flipped over a couch by my dad once thats the worst thing that my dad has ever done.....it doesnt seem bad to me when i here stories about how my dads dad threw him down a staircase when he was younger.....i dont find anything wrong with it.....im not going to raise my kids like that but i still dont think its wrong.....my point basicly Parents should be able to raise there kids the way they want. |
Date: 1/20/2004 3:48:00 PM
From Authorid: 62267
No. There is a difference between spanking and hitting...Freaq  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 3:49:00 PM
From Authorid: 62267
Oooo unless theyve been on drugs or drinking then yes! Hit them in the face with ur fist...they'll appreciate it one day...Freaq |
Date: 1/20/2004 4:09:00 PM
From Authorid: 62146
I am not sure how legal it is but ok sometimes a perent might loss their temper at the kid and hit them if they might really deserve it. But when A kid is constently bashed by their perents for little or no reason then it is defently not right. But their are other ways to punish a child besides hitting them.  |
Date: 1/20/2004 4:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 54968
I think it is okay for parents to hit their children if they have a reason to do so. My parents hit me when I was bad. So as a child, I learned not to do that or else I will get hit. And I didn't wanna get hit. But if they parent just goes around swinging their arms at their kids, that it WRONG! what did the kid do to deserve that punishment? Nothing!  |
Date: 1/20/2004 4:38:00 PM
From Authorid: 51635
Thats how I was raised and I see nothing wrong with it...I like the job my parents did with me, I think I turned out pretty good...  |
Date: 1/20/2004 5:14:00 PM
From Authorid: 20497
I was spanked with belts on the bare butt, but i wasnt a bad child...I think some parents take their anger out on their children...... anger from the day or frustration with lack of money etc. I do agree with spankings, but not to the degree that I received them..... that was a little too much. My son responds better with being grounded, as we speak he is in his room crying he is bored..... hes grounded LOL  |
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Date: 1/20/2004 5:43:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 32133
yeah you see i get smacked up side the head then get grounded lol...i get double |
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Date: 1/20/2004 5:53:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 32133
one other thing is my dad punches me for fun.....we just punch eachother and fool around all the time and he taught me how to fight so he knows i can take a smack when i need one its not like i have never gotten a punch in the face...when we were fooling around once he punched me in the face and chipped my tooth lol it was funny...we are close with eachother in someways (other ways i hate him) |
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Date: 1/20/2004 6:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 62267
I think ur bein' abused and need to get ur dad some help...sorry maybe none of my business but sounds bad...freaq |
Date: 1/20/2004 7:37:00 PM
From Authorid: 19460
Spanking, I'm all for it... when it's needed. Hitting kids harshly, or beating them is wrong. I used to have to spank my kids everynow and again, but they have learned what not to do. I havent had to spank any of them for a long time. They are 10, 7 and 5, and behave quite well. Everyone brags on my kids behavior. I have other ways to punish them besides spanking them everytime they do something bad. I found it hurts my sons worse to hide their nintendo controllers (LOL) or tell them they can't play sports. My daughter (the 5 year old) all you have to do is have a talk with her. She gets the point fast and gets her heart broken easily, so she is easy to contend with. but yeah, every kid needs their rear ends tore up from time to time. It's natural and theres nothing wrong with a little spanking now and then.  |
Date: 1/21/2004 12:55:00 AM
From Authorid: 53360
I dont see a darn thing wrong with it. My daughter is one of those kids that a time out doesnt do a thing to her. I have to spank her to let her know I mean business. And I have spanked her in public and no one has ever said a thing to me about. A few swats on the butt usually does the job. Now MY mom used to swat us with a belt, and either she had really bad aim, or she did it on purpose but she seemed to hit everywhere but our butts. OOoo and dont you dare put your hands back there cause youd get it on your hands too. Ill never use a belt with mine, cause I remember how it felt.  |
Date: 1/21/2004 5:37:00 PM
From Authorid: 38474
I agree alot with Crash on this one, a swat with an open hand on the butt is okay. I DO NOT and WILL NEVER think it is okay to hit your child with a coat hanger, book, belt or any other object. I also do NOT think slapping a child in the mouth for smart mouthing is okay. Taking away privileges doesn't always work with all children. Grounding a child doesn't always work with all children. If spanking a child with an open hand on the butt is the only thing that works then I don't see anything wrong with it as long as it doesn't lead into abuse.....  |
Date: 1/22/2004 5:54:00 AM
From Authorid: 2030
Kids are like billiard balls. The harder you hit them the more action you get out of them. LOL  |
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Date: 1/22/2004 3:23:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 32133
hahaha Bcar |
Date: 1/26/2004 8:41:00 AM
From Authorid: 22275
No!!!!! thats just what i think at all  |
Date: 4/11/2004 7:52:00 AM
From Authorid: 40741
you wouldent say that if u knew how it was to be abused even if its a good reason sometimes they wont stop..............  |
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