Date: 1/12/2004 8:11:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53900
I have already tried talking to the mom too. She is worse then her daughter. When I told her what was going on she said Crystal probably deserves it because she is always saying things to her daughter and that she cant do anything about it anyhow. Honestly in my opinion I dont care what someone says to you you have no right to put a finger on them ever.  |
Date: 1/12/2004 8:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 57232
What a little snot! Is she an ugly girl? I'll never forget the day that I turned the table on my high school tormenters and said WHOA wait a second you are worse than me! BUT this is really different why does this girl feel the need to include your whole family. This is deep rooted, something to do wrong with her own family. Oh I have to say it again what a little snot. I hope they get theirs, because this is just terrible. Maybe home schooling would be the answer, but why should YOU have to back down. This just makes me so mad.  |
Date: 1/12/2004 8:26:00 PM
From Authorid: 45948
Wow, I don't know what to say to this. So far it sounds like you are doing all you can do. Just make sure you go thru with getting an order to keep them away from you and your family. After that is in order, call the cops everytime she comes near your daughter. This is rediculous!!! I can't believe the girls mother won't do anything either. That is terrible!! Love,  |
Date: 1/12/2004 8:48:00 PM
From Authorid: 45397
Okay this may not be the best advise but I think what you should do is when that girl starts picking on your daughter and starts to beat her up, tell your daughter to hit her back, and to stand up for herself. One day that girl is going to go too far picking on someone smaller than she is and that person is gonna put her in her place real good.  |
Date: 1/12/2004 8:49:00 PM
From Authorid: 19460
I understand what you are going through. B Monkey suggested home schooling, but I don't think that would help the situation, it would only make your daughter feel punished. I went through the same thing in the 6th grade with some girls who just loved to pick on me. They would shove me around in the lockerroom and call me "white girl" and "white trash". We moved during the summer(not becuase of the bully) and I was so relieved. My advice would just to tell your daughter to beat the living daylights out of this bully next time she lays a finger on her. I know that sounds harsh, but she just can't stand there and let someone beat on her. And file charges on this child if you even hear her whisper your childs name. That bully needs to be put into Juvy or a youth home or something. I am so sorry you are going through this. My son is having trouble with a bully right now, but it has gone as far as beating on one another. So far he just makes fun of my sons clothes and shoes and calls him "slave" which my son finds hilarious. He told the bully that if he can't think of something better to call him that actually fits him, he needs to go home and practice his name calling skills lol  |
Date: 1/12/2004 9:02:00 PM
From Authorid: 62066
What an evil little toerag! Have you seen the principal of the school about this? If you haven't, you really should. Get your daughter to stand up for herself next time, like Wyndrune and Froggy Baby have said. This really irritates me that little brats like this girl have to take THEIR problems on other kids. Sounds like the snot has a really stuffed up family...  |
Date: 1/12/2004 9:09:00 PM
From Authorid: 29781
I would consider signing her up for some martial arts. I don't know where exactly you guys are located but I take Kung Fu San Soo here in Texas. What our school teaches is self defense. Not all the moves and things taught are for hurting or killing an attacker. I know a lot of simple moves to get someone off of you without hurting or bruising them. It's a matter of knowing how the body works and reacts. Our school starts teaching kids at age 5. Not only do our kids learn some possible life saving techniques, but they also gain their own confidence. I would check out some martial arts schools for tips and see what's in your area.  |
Date: 1/12/2004 9:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 12341
What a horrible situation. I don't know what more you can do, but keep the pressure on for keeping her away from your daughter. Also use the safe school act, the school is liable and be sued if they fail to provide a safe environment for your daughter. Call the police EVERY time she starts any trouble, someone will have to listen and take some action.  |
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Date: 1/12/2004 9:17:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53900
Sounds like a good idea...I have told my daughter and even showed her ways of defending herself but eitehr she gets to scared or something and she says she cant do anything. I was the same way as a child when I was her age. I try not to fight her battles for her but it hurts me so badly to see her getting called these names and being humiliated and beat up I am going to see if I can find some affordable self defense or karate classes |
Date: 1/12/2004 9:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 47296
If possible, enroll her into a Tai Chi class in your area. While Tai Chi is martial arts, it is a Taoist discipline. It will teach discpline, as well as offering a way for your daughter to defend herself, and also teach her when to use it, and to what degree.  |
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Date: 1/12/2004 9:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 47296
Here is a site to help you find a good school. http://www.taichiamerica.com/Schools.htm |
Date: 1/12/2004 9:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 36704
Without actual damages like hospital bills etc. I don't think you'd have a very strong case in small claims court. Does she go to your daughters school and if she harasses her at school, you could try the principle, if that doesn't work go to the superintendent, and if that doesn't work, get a lawyer and go after the school district for failing to keep your daughter safe. Good luck.  |
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Date: 1/12/2004 9:47:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53900
I was thinking more emotional and physical suffering but I was not sure if that waas allowable or not |
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Date: 1/12/2004 9:49:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53900
Thanks Two Spirit none of those are near where we live. Tampa is about 120 miles and Miami is about probably 300. Melbourne would be the closest but even it is to far until I get my own car which will hopefully be next month. |
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Date: 1/12/2004 9:53:00 PM
From Authorid: 36704
physical suffering you're going to have to have medical bills otherwise you have no case and without the medical damages they usually won't award emotional damages |
Date: 1/12/2004 11:03:00 PM
From Authorid: 48527
give your daughter a long speech about ow she should kick that bullies tushie next time! and I really think you should sign her up for martial arts. PS: if you think that bully is capable of doing real damage keep your daughter supplied with peppermint spray or somthing, I was gonna say pocket knife..but that's a tad TOO dangerous  |
Date: 1/13/2004 12:56:00 AM
From Authorid: 44321
You can take your daughter in for boxing lessons,I had a boy that was horrible to me day in and day out,until I popped him in the mouth,he had the nerve to go crying to my mother and showed her his split lip!my mom asked him what he was doing to me,she knew I was not the type to just hit someone for no reason.  |
Date: 1/13/2004 5:56:00 AM
From Authorid: 27046
The worst thing that can be done is ignoring bullies. It's the fact that other children ignore what goes on that results in the continuation of bullying. I saw a show once where this kid was on the ground the bullies were kicking dirt at him and there was TONS of kids standing around the school yard and they all turned their heads to it and kept their mouth shut. THAT needs to stop. Talk to her teacher, talk to her class, and talk to her friends. Call her teacher and tell her tell her that you would like to be a guest in the classroom to talk about bullying and what kids NEED to do when they see it going on. You don't have to go to the extreme of pointing this kid out to all her classmates, but you can make them aware that they play a big difference in whether or not someone else gets bullied.  |
Date: 1/13/2004 9:43:00 AM
From Authorid: 58611
I would say to go to the school and talk to the teacher as well as the principle and make a call to the superintendent as well. I agree with everyone else about the self defense classes and telling her to hit back! When you go to see the people at school throw into the conversation that you feel they are failing thier duty of keeping your child safe. Do whatever you have to do sweety, nobody deserves to be treated like this.  |
Date: 1/13/2004 9:54:00 AM
From Authorid: 943
I like Base's advice the best. Go to the Principal, then the Superintendent, and if that don't work, get a lawyer. The school must do it's part to keep your child safe!  |
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Date: 1/13/2004 9:55:00 AM
From Authorid: 943
I also agree a little self defense will do wonders for her self esteem. Good luck to both of you. |
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Date: 1/13/2004 10:58:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53900
The only problem with going to the school is she is not really doing much at school and if she does then she makes sure there are no witnesses and so when I have went to the school to speak to them about what they can do if anything is going on at school they tell meif there is no witness they can do nothing and they are only responsible for my daughter while she is physically at school or on the bus. After she gets off the bus they are no longer responsible and thta is when most of this is happening. The injunction should take care of that though atleast from what the police told us if we get an injunction that will keep her from even being able to talk to my daughter. She will be allowed no contact whatsoever with her. |
Date: 1/13/2004 11:45:00 AM
From Authorid: 53284
If you get the injunction, then she could be reported to the police if she comes near your house.  |
Date: 1/13/2004 1:36:00 PM
From Authorid: 49857
i hate bullies!! grrr... I was bullied my whole life till grade 8. it NEVER stopped, ignoring didnt work, telling people didnt work, the authorities thought it was just kids being kids...it wasnt. it just caused more embarassment that people knew i was being pushed around and nobody would do anyhting about it. so you know what i did...I joined kickboxing and womens karate classes. And now everyone is scared of me --and ive never even been in a real fight in my life! i was the most unathletic person i know, before i joined those classes. I highly reccomend you putting your daughter in self defense classes, it really helps! it boosts your self esteem and you meet new people! in my eyes, if nobody will do anyhting about it, why not take matter into your own hands. I know fighting is wrong, but sometimes, you just have to let go and show people they cant do this to you. Life is a fight. and i think if theyre letting the other girl get away with all that, than surely, your daughter wont get in any trouble...especially if its self defense. Even if they take you to court, if the other girl starts anything, she'll get the blame,whoever throws the first punch is responsible. theres alot of witnesses that know she treats your daughter likethis right? so im sure legal action would work out good.. i hope my advice helps!! x0x
-gutterflower |
Date: 1/13/2004 5:53:00 PM
From Authorid: 6860
Wow, I've kinda gone through the same thing; I was harassed for several months a few years ago. After many many trial and errors to try and fix it, they stopped when this was brought to the attention of the principle. However, two years later, they are doing the same thing to another girl. Unfortunatly, you could do as much as you possibly could, and some people just won't change. Sorry I don't have better advice for you. Tell your daughter to stay strong throughout this; she is a beautiful girl with so much potential, and its not fair to let this bring her down! You stay strong too, Jessica, it's one of the only ways to get through this! Good luck!   |
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Date: 1/13/2004 5:59:00 PM
From Authorid: 6860
I agree with Az, I think ignoring it is one of the worst things that you can do. It's a common misconception that every child is told in their lives. IT DOESN'T WORK! Ignoring only makes them try harder. I would suggest bringing this to the attention of her teacher, her guidance counselor, and the principle. They need to be aware of whats going on, and it's THEIR job to stop it. |
Date: 1/13/2004 6:01:00 PM
From Authorid: 38601
Sign your daughter up for karate...or try a restraining order, if they can be effectual with minors...I think they can, sorry this is happening! *hugs*  |
Date: 1/13/2004 6:42:00 PM
From Authorid: 38119
I think this IS more than a normal school problem. She's not just calling your daughter names, but also physically assaulting her, repeatedly. If you can't resolve this any other way, and it seems that you have really tried, maybe you should transfer her to another school.  |
Date: 1/14/2004 12:07:00 PM
From Authorid: 54830
does your daughter have any older friends? high school age maybe? if she does, or you know someone.. a babysitter, a cousin in the same town.. that can serve as good protection.. not to physically fight but to just say, hey.. ive got older friends, so you'd better back off.. ive done it to my younger friends bullies for them, and its worked pretty well..  |
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Date: 1/14/2004 12:08:00 PM
From Authorid: 54830
does your daughter have any older friends? high school age maybe? if she does, or you know someone.. a babysitter, a cousin in the same town.. that can serve as good protection.. not to physically fight but to just say, hey.. ive got older friends, so you'd better back off.. ive done it to my younger friends bullies for them, and its worked pretty well.. |
Date: 1/15/2004 11:39:00 AM
From Authorid: 39887
I would put me a camera and catch her on video. I would take it to your local juvenile office and get advice. I also would take it to he Dept of family and children services and see if this mother could be dealt with. Parents are liable for their children's actions. There is something not right with this picture. I don't believe the authorities are doing their job, go see the district attorney, take the video. Maybe you are not being aggressive enough to the police, threaten them with a lawsuit if they don't take action on your daughters behalf. This kid needs to be taken behind the barn!!  |
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Date: 1/15/2004 11:46:00 AM
From Authorid: 39887
I thought of something else. Threaten the scholl and authorities that you will have this matter brought to public attention by writing about it in your local paper and also getting your local tv station to come to the school. FORCE your authority on them, they won't like their name smeared on tv or in the paper. I know what I would do but its not good advice. I feel so sorry or your daughter. I was raised with six brothers and I learned early on to defend myself, I put several bullies in their place in school. If your daughter is not the aggressive type, fight for her. |
