Date: 9/25/2003 10:27:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
I watch my stepdaughter like a hawk, have special doors on the medicine cabinet, under the sink etc, at one point when she was still in diapers we had a lock on the outside of her door once she learned how to get out of the crib. Could it happen? Probably. On my watch? Heck no... I'd be killed... I have double responsibility because I'm not the "real" mom and if anything happened people would be quick to judge (never mind her "real" mom called once when she was a baby and said that she "may" have ingested a bottle of aspirin)... |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:30:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 27046
Keth and you are saying you never left her in front of the TV to go in the kitchen and make dinner, or to go to the bathroom, whatever it may be she has never been left in a room alone by herself at all ever? |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:31:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
Honestly no, I am paranoid... if I go to the bathroom I have her "hold the door" closed so no one can get in... She colors on the kitchen table when I am cooking, I'm PARANOID I tell you! |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:32:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
I also have a leash thinking that links our wrists when we shop... my mom had one when we were little... |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:32:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
She thinks its cool because she pretends she's a puppy... heh |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:32:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 27046
Do you know that I was reading online and leaving your child in another room is considered to be neglectful by social services. So how does a parent sleep? LOL |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:33:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 27046
I have leashes too, and was told how barbaric I was for treating my kids like a puppy...LOL |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:34:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
The inlaw's house is very open too, and my apartment is small, so there is nowhere she can go where I can't see her... you can see straight from the kitchen into the livingroom at their house so she watches tv IN the kitchen with the volume cranked up. If she rides the bike I follow on roller skates... |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:34:00 AM
From Authorid: 54987
We all make mistakes... and that's how we learn. |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:35:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
Social Services is notorious for barking up the wrong tree on occasions. Aly was playing tag at day care and tripped and hit her head on the wall, that night a bloodvessel in her forehead burst causing her whole face to be black. We kept her out of school till she was totally back to normal, and got statements from the childcare workers that the accident happened there on THEIR time... |
Date: 9/25/2003 10:36:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
If anyone told me I was barbaric I would say "I would rather have her on a leash than being abducted..." |
Date: 9/25/2003 11:09:00 AM
From Authorid: 13297
I have no children but I did read a story on here not too long ago about a mother in a hotel who took a shower while here two year old son was in the other room. He unlocked the door to the room, went outside, got in the car and proceeded to drive it into the hotel. The police came and investigated and dubbed him "little houdini". The did not charge the mother because he escaped to the car again while they were investigating. The deemed that she had to take a shower sometime and that she just had a really smart kid. I think that a parent can't be everywhere all the time - they just have to take all REASONABLE precautions. I know I would be like kethria were I a parent. I would watch my kids like a hawk... |
Date: 9/25/2003 11:41:00 AM
From Authorid: 53052
parents dont have eyes in the back of thier heads.... no parent can be everywhere at one time... i think some parents just refuse to admit that they did something that could be considered "wrong"... like the little one fell off the couch or bumped thier head on the coffee table(hey that has happened to every mother even if they don't want to admit to it) |
Date: 9/25/2003 12:00:00 PM
From Authorid: 2030
My kids have written on the way in crayon, and one stuffed 3 bars of soap down the toilet, and another time pulled a cup of coffee on himself. But they never got into the childproofed cabinets, or wandered into the street, or escaped me in a store, or were injured due to neglect. You can all draw your own conclusions from that. |
Date: 9/25/2003 12:07:00 PM
From Authorid: 53900
You knw I think there is a difference in carelessness and out and out neglect...accidents happen even though a parent has done everything in their control to keep them from happening...neglect to me is where the parent can see something may happen and does nothing to stop it from happening. |
Date: 9/25/2003 12:11:00 PM
From Authorid: 53900
Let me clarify this by talking about a post on here...a little girl was playing in an alleyway and this little girl was only 14 months old...she had absolutely no business being out tehre unsupervised for any reason she was barely a year old...that is negligent on her caregivers part...ok bnow if a child is five or six or seven and were to be playing in his driveway with a ball or something and it rolled in the street and the child ran after it then that to me is an accident. I can see where you are coming from though I know I am not perfect my daughter got away from me one time and after that it has never happened again because I learned my lesson and took precautions against t happening again. Not to say that my kids have never gotten into things or gotten hurt while I was watching them because they have but like I said there is a difference between taking precautions against bad things happening and them happening anyhow and just saying oh well I dont really care if tehy happen or not and just letting a child run loose with no supervision |
Date: 9/25/2003 12:25:00 PM
From Authorid: 25756
Does a child need to be watched constantly? It makes no sense to me that a child should be because a kid can't develop a sense of independance if they are constantly being watched and told what to do. Certain precautions need to be taken of course...make sure all the medicines and poison and whatever else the child might possibly get into are out of the way and locks are on certain doors and cabinets and gates are put up in front of stairwells, etc. But, really, who can possibly keep watch over their children 24/7 without some one going crazy? What if they have more than one child? Kids will be kids...they'll get hurt, they'll make mistakes. As long as the parent is warning them against these kinds of things and helping them to learn from their mistakes and not just leaving the child to play with poison or matches, I don't see why that would be called neglect? |
Date: 9/25/2003 12:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 28848
The may fall off its axis, but I actually agree with Bcar. My kids have gotten into things like make-up etc. But never do they get into things like poisons. Things like that are locked away. And when they were younger I used safety gates in doorways and special locks on doors, now they are old enough to know better. And no I'm not saying that nothing will ever happen to them, because no one is perfect. |
Date: 9/25/2003 1:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 28848
*earth |
Date: 9/25/2003 1:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 33925
Never happen to MY kids?? LMAO!! Az you already know some of the things I have had happen with my kids..heehee..they are KIDS..Kids are gonna do stupid things whether we want to admit it or not, and all the childproofing and precautions there are, are not going to prevent some things from happening. Kids are curious and active and full of energy and you cant watch them 24/7..I remember the time my oldest son got out of the house literally behind my back. I was sitting on the deck talking on the phone about 11pm one night. All the kids were in bed sleeping..or so I thought. Jeremy got up, went downstairs, didnt see me and panicked..Put on his rubber boots and headed out the door in nothing but his boots and his undies..heehee..He went next door to a neighbours and banged on her door until he got her up..HOW I didnt hear this I will never know. Next thing I know there is a knock at my back door. (I am sitting on the FRONT deck) I go and answer it and there is my neighbour with Jeremy in her arms. Thank GOD she wasnt the busy body type to call the police or Social Services..She knew that normally I take very good care of my kids and she figured I must have been in the tub or something when he snuck out. It happens..the only things that upset me are when I hear stories of people leaving their babies and small children in a vehicle while they go shopping..grrrr...that POs me BIG time. |
Date: 9/25/2003 2:02:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 27046
Okay again let me clarify this since I seem to be having enormous difficulty in communicating. My cabinets are locked, all of my medicine is locked, and my poisons have never been available to my children. When my husband installed the first lock on the knife drawer in my kitchen, it opened wide enough where I could fit my hand in and pull things out, and it was changed immediately to a shorter clip. I understand the basic safety measures. But what my daughter did do was slice her thumb open when she got into my make-up bag to play with my lipstick. She stuck her little finger right in the hole of my eye liner sharpener. I mean naturally the scissors, razors, knives and other little handy sized deadly weapons were locked up, gee who would of thought about the sharpener, inside the make-up bag up in a cupboard you can barely reach as an adult. The poison reference wasn't a literal one, and it was just an example of how the circumstances are different when it comes to whose kid got into what, and the difference being one that causes serious harm and one that is no big deal. |
Date: 9/25/2003 2:10:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 27046
I can tell you what. I as a parent feel like I smother my children, however I am also one of those parents that if can happen, it happens to me. Anytime I have been the least bit lax in their supervision I have been hit with a whammo of a blow with it. Even taking the necessary precautions or what we thought were the necessary precautions, didn't work. I didn't have a toddler, I had a literal monkey. She was running by the time she was 9 months old. At 11 months old my sister was watching her and she was sitting on the couch at my mom's. She was on the phone, turned around walked into the kitchen, turned and came back out and she was dangling from the curtain rod. I had to bolt my books shelves to the walls because regardless of what I did this kid would not stop climbing on them. Our dressers were also bolted to the walls and any tall heavy furniture got it too. I had a very different child from the basic toddler and my house has been the best fort knox you can make out of an ancient run down house...lol |
Date: 9/25/2003 2:26:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 27046
Just out of curiosity I was wondering how many have locks on their fridges? |
Date: 9/25/2003 4:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 3648
No, I'm not quick to jump saying not my child....cause it happens and has happened to me....my oldest son who was 4 at the time. Went out from a upstairs window to the lower roof below. I had no idea he did this. I had just checked on him and he was playing in his room. Never would I'd have thought he would do something like that. My next door neighbour came to my door telling me he was up but of course he was down stairs by the time I answered the door. I know we can't watch our children 24/7 it's impossible to do no matter what kind of super parent we claim to be (there is no such thing as a perfect parent). I do take my responsibility as a parent seriously almost to the point my kids are now calling me a overprotecting parent. Granted my kids are older and know better but still you can't help worrying. As parents we can only do our our best and hope it's good enough. |
Date: 9/25/2003 4:38:00 PM
From Authorid: 10245
I used to have a lock on my fridge, but I figured it wasn't safe anymore since the older kids figured out how to unlock it (or lock their little brother in!) and finally took it off. I understand what your saying...these things happen. I use my own mother's experiences as my "ruler". LOL My brother was a problem child...he'd been hit by cars twice, ate an entire bottle of baby asprin and jabbed a stick he was pushing along the sidewalk with his tummy, through himself... all by the time he was 4 and before I was even born. I've only had to take 1 trip to the ER for injuries... when my 9 month old swallowed a HUGE costume jewelry earring that my daughter was playing with one Valentine's Day morning and turned blue. He got it down okay, but he scared the crap out of me! It was one of those incidents that you mentioned... I was only gone for a couple seconds, just to let the dog out, and he popped it in his mouth. By my mom's experience with only one to watch out for, I think I'm doing great with my 3! |
Date: 9/25/2003 4:40:00 PM
From Authorid: 10245
GEG's comment just reminded me of something that could have happened, too... I caught my daughter standing on the roof one day... I didn't realize she had popped the lock on her window. I FREAKED when I saw her standing there... I'm surprised I didn't scare her into falling off. |
Date: 9/25/2003 5:14:00 PM
From Authorid: 8278
honestly, it is hard for a parent to keep their eyes on their child 24/7...especially if they are a single parent. my son has severe ADHD and he has been in more situations than i can count. he is very quick too. if i turn my back for a second, he is into something. he has always been that way. he was in the room, doing laundry with me when he was younger and got into my purse and opened a bottle of child proof asprin and ate them. spent the next 12 hours in the ER. he has had a broken arm twice, torn ligaments in his leg and had more bumps on the head than anyone i know. but it isn't just at home. in kindergarten, i got a phone call that he had jumped out of the classroom window. in first grade he ran head first into a metal pole. he also (during one of his many trips to the principals office) locked the principal out of the office and was in there alone. i had a leash for him and i also got many looks and comments for it. my son is one of those kids that could have 3 adults in the room and still find something to land him in the ER. sometimes it doesn't matter how much constant supervision you have for them...they will still be quick enough to get into something. by the way...my house has always been child proofed. when my son was 2, i went to use the bathroom (was gone for a minute and my mother was in the house with him) and my son still managed to get the dead-bolt lock opened and ran out, all in the matter of a minute. it is scary and i know he needs more supervision than some...but i know first hand that every bump, bruise and accident is not because of neglect. |
Date: 9/25/2003 6:15:00 PM
From Authorid: 28193
All it takes is a split second for a kid to do something..people that don't have children, don't understand this. It doesn't mean that you aren't watching your child...they are just FAST. |