Date: 9/24/2003 5:20:00 PM
From Authorid: 49546
TO the first question: Do i see intozication as a valid excuse for what he did? No ...question two: if the women became upset b y this to the point they want nothing else to do with him, do i believe they are overeacting? YES! ...  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:23:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53689
But why do you feel that they are over reacting? If a man came up to your mother/sister/daughter/girlfriend/ wife or whatever...would you just pass if off?  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 27046
As an excuse? No. As a reason? Yes. It doesn't excuse the fact that what he did was wrong but under normal circumstances he may not have been as impulsive to reach out and do something like that. I don't think that a woman would be overreacting if she were to get upset and not want anything to do with the person.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:26:00 PM
From Authorid: 27046
I feel to say that alcohol is an excuse, is wrong. It is a reason for things, yes because it does alter your state of mind, and your ability to rationalize and think clearly. To say that alcohol plays no part leaves a lot of rape cases as not-guilty.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:26:00 PM
From Authorid: 53427
This same thing happened to me years ago. A male friend of my husbands grabbed my chest when he was drunk. We were standing there talking and he just reached out and did it. My husband was standing right next to him. I thought it was pretty funny, especially because he just kept right along talking to us about other things and I don't know if he even realized what he did. I guess it depends on the person and the situation. I can understand you getting upset and being drunk is no excuse.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 33925
My Grandmother had an old saying that I find to be absolutely true! What you do when you are drunk is what you REALLY want to do when your sober but you dont have the nerve!! Its so true..Alcohol is like liquid courage. The guy probably wanted to do what he did sober but didnt dare, so he used the alcohol as an excuse to be a total butt wipe. As for the girl overreacting. Nope I dont think so. She has every right to be upset and disgusted and every right to tell him where to go and help him along the way with the end of her foot!  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:32:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53689
Thanks everyone for your comments.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:50:00 PM
From Authorid: 27046
You know Lady Luck, I do believe along the same lines when you are still in the state of mind that you are aware of what it is you are doing. For example, getting drunk and dancing on the tables or having the guts to walk up to guy and hit on them. Then there are things that happen the next day that everyone tells you about and have you have absolutely no clue that you came even close to doing anything that they describe. It then becomes more like liquid "OMG, why didn't you take me home and put me to bed before I did anymore damage." LOL  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:52:00 PM
From Authorid: 53900
No and no...No it is not an excuse a man should never violate a woman in that way without her consent and no it is their feelings and their feelings are valid to them just because one person may not get upset over it does not mean that somebody else wouldnt and does not have every right to get upset  |
Date: 9/24/2003 5:53:00 PM
From Authorid: 33925
LOLOL..Az I have been in those types of situations..LOL..total blackout..BUT, I have never done anything that would be considered offensive or vulger towards another person. I usually just make an ass of MYSELF!! LOL..I think that old saying pertains to someone who does things to others while they are drunk..IE hitting on a certain girl or guy that they have known. They wouldnt dare while sober, but pour that liquid courage in and there is no holding them back!  |
Date: 9/24/2003 6:00:00 PM
From Authorid: 16845
was he intoxicated by his own doing or was he forced? LOL Sorry my law classes coming through right now  |
Date: 9/24/2003 6:04:00 PM
From Authorid: 27046
I have never done anything harmful to anyone when drunk, that I remember or couldn't remember and someone told me about. I have had some pretty wild fights with bushes walking my drunk butt home...LOL. However, I know people that have done some stupid stuff that wouldn't have even come close to doing that if they could have had two seconds to think about it. The mind process it altered too much when anything is added to interupt it. They haven't done anything off the wall, but there have been rude things said and done that they would have kept to themselves if they weren't so quick with tongue being drunk..LOL  |
Date: 9/24/2003 6:13:00 PM
From Authorid: 53052
yes he should be held responsable.... atleast to some degree.. if he KNOWS he acts bad while he's drunk...he shouldn't drink!  |
Date: 9/24/2003 6:16:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53689
By his own doing, Becky...Believe me, nobody has ever had to force this guy to drink..lol.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 6:50:00 PM
From Authorid: 34814
I don't think people should get lit to the point that they can't control themselves.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 7:01:00 PM
From Authorid: 29532
#1 NO WAY NEVER UH UH NOPE, NO #2 NOPE, NO WAY NUH UH NOPE too  |
Date: 9/24/2003 7:04:00 PM
From Authorid: 61901
No Excuse! And no, they would not be over reacting. I would consider this as an Assault.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 7:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 31837
Better, yet: is there an excuse for being intoxicated? LOL! There is no excuse in my opinion. A dirt bag is a dirt bag. Great post. By the way I don't think women would be over reacting if they wanted to report a sicko like that. :^D  |
Date: 9/24/2003 7:25:00 PM
From Authorid: 34487
Wow, this really hits home for me, since I've been in this situation before. I guess, I did excuse his behavior to a point but also lost a lot of respect for him when he did it more than once in the same night. It was also my boyfriend (now hubby's) best friend and it was 10 yrs ago. I've gotten over it now and hold no hard feelings since I think he's probably grown up quite a bit since then but at the time, my boyfriend found it unexcusable.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 7:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 34487
I meant to add that in my experience, it was my chest first and later on he grabbed my in a less G-rated location. I was shocked and yes, it's very wrong for anyone to do. I think being mad about it is normal, since they've violated not only your personal space buy you as a person.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 7:38:00 PM
From Authorid: 45630
I do not believe that intoxication is an excuse for that sort of behaviour. We know what we are doing when we are drunk just because we may not be able to remember it isn't the point! On the other hand however a person who gets drunk on rum and gets violent is reacting to a chemical reaction in him to that particular beverage.  |
Date: 9/24/2003 8:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 16671
I agree with az for a change.  |
Date: 9/25/2003 8:56:00 AM
From Authorid: 58611
The women are not over-reacting. And intoxication is in no way any kind of excuse. I hate hearing that, oh I was drunk/messed up, I couldnt help it...thats the biggest load of crap! If you cant control yourself when inebriated then dont drink in the first place.  |
Date: 9/25/2003 11:16:00 AM
From Authorid: 54987
No it isn't an excuse! But some people use it as one for bad behaviour. And again no - women should get upset if a man does this under alcohol. Alcohol lowers the inhibitions so what you're seeing is the true man beleive it or not.  |
Date: 9/26/2003 10:43:00 AM
From Authorid: 55967
First question: NO. Intoxication is strictly a personal responsibility, as is social interraction. Second question: NO. If the women don't want their chests touched by a man, they have EVERY right to avoid him whenever they want. Now, I will read the rest of the comments.  |
Date: 9/26/2003 11:01:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 53689
I have to admit that seeing so many agree with me on this feels good. As some of you know, I am almost always up for an debate..lol..but I really must confess that I was partly looking for some validation that I was doing the right thing in standing up for myself in this situation. And if I wasn't, I was hoping to understand why. Thank you all for your comments.  |
Date: 9/26/2003 12:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 62060
Ive drank, but ive never been drunk, whats it like? (demonstrating own naivety here, but what the hell)  |
Date: 9/26/2003 9:09:00 PM
From Authorid: 22080
i think people who screw up alot while drunk should not be able to drink ever again and for question 2, no  |
Date: 9/27/2003 5:35:00 AM
From Authorid: 42945
no, I dont think they are over reacting and this man needs to leave the drink alone if he cannot behave in a responsible manner, he sounds like an idiot..hugs  |
Date: 9/27/2003 7:30:00 AM
From Authorid: 48809
No one should ever take it upon themselves to do something so personal to someone else. And certainly being drunk is not an excuse to do something like this. (If you cannot handle yourself in a decent manner then you should not be drinking.) I would personally take this type of low behavior very seriously and as a great insult and might perhaps put a well placed kick in the right area to see how he likes it.  |
Date: 9/27/2003 8:51:00 AM
From Authorid: 22080
when i lived in alaska we used to have this guy who would show up at concerts drunk and he'd do this, now at the time i did drink alot but i wasnt a moron like him, he had so many sexual harassment charges brought against him, finally we just stopped letting him into concerts, i mean i dont drink anymore at all but when i did i would only do it at my house or with my friends where i couldnt get myself into trouble  |
Date: 9/27/2003 9:48:00 AM
From Authorid: 30051
No excuse at all..I don't think the woman are overreacting. They were violated.  |
Date: 9/29/2003 11:17:00 AM
From Authorid: 62060
Hypothetical situation - girl and guy both get drunk and spend the night together. The guy likes the girl, but under normal circumstances she would never even talk to him. She sobers up and screams rape. Who is to blame here?  |
Date: 12/21/2003 10:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 37900
I don't think there's any excuse for what he did, whether he was intoxicated or sober. I believe a woman would be wise to avoid him, as he has clearly demonstrated he has no regard either for his public behavior or for women.  |
Date: 12/21/2003 10:33:00 PM
From Authorid: 32070
Ok, maybe it's just me. But, I don't think this man ( or any other ) has a right to "gropple" a woman. Friends or not.... I would add what would happen to him if he had done that to me, but it would just get deleted....and that's no mater how nice *I* would put it :P....  |