If it's worth fighting for, it's worth fighting dirty for.
Don't lie, cheat or steal...unnecessarily.
There is always one more S.O.B. than you counted on.
An honest answer can get you into a lot of trouble.
The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
Chicken little only has to be right once.
"NO" is only an interim response.
You can't kill a bad idea.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you ever tried.
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A man owned a small farm in South Georgia. The Wage and Hour Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent to interview him.
"You just give me a list of your employees and tell me how much you pay them."
"All right," said the farmer. "I have a hired man. Been with me for three years. I pay him $600 a week, plus room and board. I have a cook. She's been here six months. She gets $500 a week plus room and board."
"Anybody else?" asked the agent as he scribbled on a note pad.
"Yeah," the farmer said. "There's a half-wit here. Works about eighteen hours a day. I pay him ten dollars a week and give him chewing tobacco."
"Aha!" the agent roared. "I want to talk to that half-wit!"
"You're talkin' to him now," said the farmer.
======================
"Darling," whispered a frail little husband from his chair. "I'm very sick, would you please call me a vet?"
"A vet? Why do you want a vet and not a medical doctor?" asked his wife.
The husband replied, "Because I work like a horse, live like a dog, and have to sleep with a silly OLD cow!"
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