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Heaven is Getting Crowded...SmoknJokes

  Author:  54570  Category:(Humor) Created:(6/16/2003 9:09:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (1196 times)



It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the admittance Policy. The new law was that, in order to get into Heaven, you had to have a real bummer of a day when you died.

The policy would go into effect at noon the next day. The next day at 12:01, the first person came to the gates of Heaven. The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, promptly said to the man, "Before I let you in, I need you to tell me how your day was going when you died."

No problem," the man said.

"I came home to my 25th floor apartment on my lunch hour and caught my wife half naked. She appeared to be having an affair, but her lover was nowhere in sight. I immediately began searching for him. My wife was yelling at me as I searched the entire apartment. Just as I was about to give up, I happened to glance out onto the balcony and noticed there was a man hanging off the edge by his fingertips, The nerve of that guy!

Well, I ran out onto the balcony and stomped on his fingers until he fell to the ground. But wouldn't you know it, he landed in some trees and bushes that broke his fall and he didn't die.

This ticked me off even more.

In a rage, I went back inside to get the first thing I could get my hands on to throw at him. Oddly enough, the first thing I thought of was the refrigerator. I unplugged it, pushed it out on to the balcony and tipped it over the side. It plummeted 25 stories and crushed him. The excitement of the moment was so great that I had a heart attack and died almost instantly.

The Angel sat back and thought a moment. Technically, the guy did have a bad day. It was a crime of passion. So the Angel announced, "Okay sir, Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven?, and let him in.

A few seconds later the next guy came up.

The Angel said "Before I can let you in, I need to hear about what your day was like when you died "

"No problem" said the second man. But you're not going to believe this. I was on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises.

I had been under a lot of pressure so I was really pushing hard to relieve my stress. I guess I got a little carried away, slipped, and accidentally fell over the side. Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony below mine.

"But all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out of his apartment, starts cussing, and stomps on my fingers. Well, of course I fell. I hit some trees and some bushes at the bottom, which broke my fall so I didn't die right away. As I'm laying there, face up on the ground, unable to move and in excruciating pain, I see this guy push his REFRIGERATOR of all things, off the balcony. It falls the 25 floors and lands on top of me killing me instantly.

The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as the man finishes his story.

I could get used to this new policy? he thinks to himself. Very well, the Angel announces, Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven and he lets the man enter.

A few seconds later, a third man comes up to the gate.

The angel says, "Please tell me how you died".

The third man says, "OK, picture this.

I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator......................"

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Halloween is Right around the corner.. .







 
Replies:      
Date: 6/16/2003 9:14:00 PM  From Authorid: 8278    LOL. i have heard this one before, but it get's a laugh out of me everytime. LOL. thanks for sharing  
Date: 6/16/2003 9:17:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 54570    your very welcome. I enjoy it as well.  
Date: 6/16/2003 9:30:00 PM  From Authorid: 51052    Umm... I think that I have this already bookmarked cause I liked it so much. Thanks for sharing.  
Date: 6/16/2003 9:47:00 PM  From Authorid: 53900    LMAO that was so funny  
Date: 6/16/2003 10:53:00 PM  From Authorid: 61966    LoL!!! That's a good one! Thx for sharing it with us all. -BreathingBody  
Date: 6/17/2003 1:19:00 AM  From Authorid: 13897    LoL!!  
Date: 6/17/2003 6:47:00 AM  From Authorid: 46069    LMAO!!!!!  
Date: 6/17/2003 12:27:00 PM  From Authorid: 54725    roflmao!  
Date: 6/22/2003 7:20:00 PM  From Authorid: 54968    LOL! This one is funny!  
Date: 5/21/2007 6:50:00 AM  From Authorid: 63026    lol this was good   

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