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Oxymorons...some old, some new

  Author:  58078  Category:(Humor) Created:(6/13/2003 7:05:00 AM)
This post has been Viewed (1143 times)

Subject: Oxymorons

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

27. Christmas is weird. What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?



Andrea - ItalianPrincess

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Halloween is Right around the corner.. .







 
Replies:      
Date: 6/13/2003 7:13:00 AM  From Authorid: 29928    LOL these are great!! Why do we say move back, when we need to cange an appt and realy want to move it forward? AND why do so many people use the word infamaous to imply famous, when it's just the opposite? Great post I really enjoyed it. Hugs,  
Date: 6/13/2003 8:00:00 AM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 58078    Why do we park in a driveway and drive on the parkway? hee hee  
Date: 6/13/2003 10:00:00 AM  From Authorid: 60018    Lol I love these! I'll have to bookmark this!  
Date: 6/13/2003 11:13:00 AM  From Authorid: 62060    lmao andrea!  
Date: 6/13/2003 1:19:00 PM  From Authorid: 61966    LOL!! I love all of these, they're great! It's kinda weird how we use opposites to explain the same thing or somethings are backwards. Anywho, great post! -BreathingBody  
Date: 6/14/2003 12:13:00 PM  From Authorid: 59940    Lol,good point!I would say that these were more ironic statements than anything else,though...I' m still mentally giggling over that last one.LMAO!FE  
Date: 7/30/2003 12:39:00 PM  From Authorid: 50678    Those are great, here is one of my favorite, Microsoft Works, and Jumbo shrimp!! And sometimes Good Morning, lol  

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