Random Thoughts

Pilot and Co-Pilot

A plane leaves Los Angeles airport under the control of a Jewish captain. His co-pilot is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together and an awkward silence between the two seems to indicate a mutual dislike. Once they reach cruising altitude, the Jewish captain activates the auto-pilot, leans back in his seat, and mutters, "I don't like the Chinese."

"You don't like the Chinese?" asks the copilot, "why not?"

"You people bombed Pearl Harbor, that's why!"

"No, no," the copilot protests, "the Chinese didn't bomb Pearl Harbor! That was the Japanese."

"Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese......doesn't matter, you're all alike!"

There's a few minutes of silence.

"I don't like Jews!!" the co-pilot suddenly announces.

"Why not?" asks the captain.

"The Jews sank the Titanic."

"Jews didn't sink the Titanic!" exclaims the captain, "it was an iceberg!"

"Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg, no matter......they're all same!" _+_+_+_ That joke was dorky,but here's one of my own...or two ^_^

Anybody remember Pokemon? Anyone remember the concept of Pokemon Master? What if the Master...had been a girl? (starts laughing hysterically)

Ooooh,I remember something else too!This happened last...Saturday night!

9 o clock at night,uncle JR decides he wants to invite my uncle to Spaghetti Factory,and of course me and my mom are gonna go.Uncle Chuy was only gonna be here for about four days,so we had to spend every moment possible together!

We had random discussions,and there was a certain one on...salt fun,lol!

Apparently a friend of mines brothers went with my uncleJr and Chuy a long time ago to the SPaghetti Factory,and they got one of the brothers (Chris) To distract Lionel (the older one) while my uncle Chuy poured Salt into his water. "Look at that light up there man,it looks like it's gonna break!" "Which one?!"(Shake shake) "That one!Look harder!""Where!?"(shake,shake) "Uh,never mind,it's nothin' "

Lionel looks back and no one looked suspicious. He takes a drink of his water and spits it back out.He calls their waiter and says,"My drink tastes salty!" (You have to hear how he talks,it's why it sounded so hilarious!) "My uncles could barely contain themselves and said,"Let me taste?" They pretend to drink it and say,"It doesn't taste salty to me!"

I was laughing so hard because another salt incident came up as well. I don't remember who she did it to,but I think my aunty did it to my uncle JR. I think he had gotten up to leave and my uncle Chuy watched her as she manically grabbed a salt shaker (Full of salt) And started shaking salt into his drink,smiling and laughing maniaccally the entire time/My uncle had looked at her said,"Are you crazy or something?" The way he said it (he imitated how they sounded as well.VERY funny!)

It sure sounded crazy,but in a funny way.

At some point,discussion of my uncles relationship with his now fiancee Benny came up.When they had started dating,she made him see a doctor so that he could have an intimate relationship with her.A lot of jokes had been made because of how bluntly she had put it. By the end of the evening,my uncle picked up a pen and dollar then proceeded to act as if he was writing on the dollar.When Benny leaned over his shoulder to lok,he said,while still looking at the dollar as if he were really writing this, "For a good time,see a doctor and call my wife."

Lets just say he was slapped,but it was in good humor :)

And for fun,read this sentence.

it is IMPERATIVE that you read this sentence aloud in order to understand it.Chances of you understanding what the following will mean are slim,so you have to read it aloud.If you don't understand it,get a parent or other family member to hear you say it out loud (Or better yet,make THEM read it.Lots of laughs,guaranteed!) It's especially funny if friends read it out loud and don't understand it... Um,I just realized I can't post the sentence.If you ask me for it,though,I'll send it to ya in a message.Trust me,lots of fun with this sentence!

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