I'm now offering free services to anyone with an internet stalker (<>..<>)

The internet is full of crazy obsessed people who for some reason or another stalk people. Personally I've never been interesting/important enough to have a stalker of my own. But I do know people who have. I've helped them all along think of things to scare their stalkers away. Because, if you didn't know, even stalkers can become freaked out if you tell them the right stuff. It's all a matter of presenting yourself as much more crazy then the stalker. It can be done even with out getting violent or breaking the law.

Here are some examples of my work this time using The Golden Girls to frighten: Response for why you are not into internet dating:

"the lack of non-touching turns me off. That is unless you happen to know a lot about The Golden Girls. I would definately fall in love with anyone who had a keen knowledge of them."

For the persistent:

"because I'm not sure what it is [<forget that part] I just can't think seriously about anyone who doesnt' know the charm of Dorothy Sborsnack"

For the really persistent start singing their theme song: "Thank you for being a friend, Travel down the road and back again, Your heart is true, you're a pal and a confidant And if you threw a party, invited everyone you knew, You would see the biggest gift would be from me And the card attached would say Thank you for being a friend"

However if your stalker is a fan of the Golden Girls, you can go down an alternate route. Perhaps your stalker is dumb, just read up a little on quantum mechanics and that will probably do it. There are all kinds of options. So if you need my help, just reply here and I'll help you make them go away. After all, that's what I'm best at :)

Quote from someone I've helped:

"I am very pleased with the services provided, i once was in a position of fending off two persistent online stalkers, this system is easy to use and safe from harm." a 16 year old girl from California. I didn't put her name for her protection.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some more responses:

"Are you interested in The Manikin movies? I've never seen plastic that entertaining in a motion picture beofore"

"I only wear wool clothes. All other clothes is just not good enough for me."

And here is one I've heard works: "I'm still so sad from my ex boyfriends death. He died because he was trampled by camels. I got it all on tape for insurance purposes."

"Could you send me $25 and a picture of you. I'd like to go to a print shop and have them screen print your picture on a thong for mel." (this one only works for stalkers who are tight with their money)

(<>..<>)Alien

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