Date: 2/12/2003 11:50:00 PM
From Authorid: 53427
If you need somebody to talk to, do not hesitate to message me. I have been in similar aituations before and I know how it feels to deal with betrayal. I will pray for you. |
Date: 2/12/2003 11:51:00 PM
From Authorid: 13119
I think that before you confront him you should get all your ducks in order. Make sure that your financially sound and have somewhere to go etc. I do think you need to confront him though, it doesn't matter how you got the info (I read your other post about the pictures) you had just cause to check. |
Date: 2/12/2003 11:54:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 11348
Magoo... he is staing in MY apartment.... I pay the rent and he stays here. He can live in his dorm but he stays with me anyway. I should confront him? I'm sooo mad I can't stop shaking. |
Date: 2/12/2003 11:54:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 11348
And thank you Snookums... I appreciate that. |
Date: 2/12/2003 11:57:00 PM
From Authorid: 13119
If its your apartment, get back the key, confront him and kick him out. Even if you do stay with him, you should kick him out and make him realise that you are not going to put up with his nonsense. You are a strong, beautiful woman and should be treated with respect. Make him work to get you back, otherwise is he really worth it? |
Date: 2/13/2003 ( From Author )
From Authorid: 11348
Thank you so much Magoo... I'm just so upset... I thought I knew everything about him and I know NOTHING. |
Date: 2/13/2003 12:11:00 AM
From Authorid: 13119
when that happens its time to take a good hard look at what you really want to happen. I can understand you are probably furious and hurt, its the worst kind of betrayal. |
Date: 2/13/2003 12:14:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 11348
I get panic attacks talking to people... especially confronting them about something... I don't know I can go in, wake him up and pry all the information out of him wihtout having a panic attack. |
Date: 2/13/2003 12:19:00 AM
From Authorid: 13119
don't do it tonight. Wait until tomorrow, write down all the points you want to bring up. Do it calmly and rationally and don't let him squirm out of it. You know the truth and just want the closure, be strong and go after what you know is right. |
Date: 2/13/2003 12:35:00 AM
From Authorid: 30229
Magoo is right, once a cheater, always a cheater.. it is sad but true. Kick him out, get your keys back and move on.. there ARE some great guys out in the world... Good Luck to ya! .*hugs* |
Date: 2/13/2003 12:57:00 AM
From Authorid: 19384
So far I think I'm the only man to respond. I can't give you advice, really, but I certainly feel for you. I was betrayed by my girlfriend and my best friend. I should have checked up on her, because I had my suspicions, but I didn't and that would have saved me years of grief. It sounds like you feel bad for looking at his ICQ, but I think you did the right thing. I hope everything turns out for you Krazy, just remember, you're not the villian here. God Bless.. |
Date: 2/13/2003 3:45:00 AM
From Authorid: 7654
To put it bluntly he is a moocher !! A user! And has no respect for you ..He wants his cake and eat it too...Kick him out because he's not worth the pain he is causing you.. |
Date: 2/13/2003 4:11:00 AM
From Authorid: 18527
Anyone who would allow you to isolate yourself from your family and friends is not worth being with... kick him out pronto! |
Date: 2/13/2003 7:08:00 AM
From Authorid: 61893
You are mad, and hurt broken.. however you have EVERY RIGHT to be! I have been through about the samething, but it was my husband ant not boyfriend. He went as far as to get his own P.O. Box without me knowing and had a girl's name and address in his wallet. He planned to write this woman and thought I would never know about it. Boy was he WRONG! Thank God for my small ability to dream things that are about to happen or has already happen or I would have never known. I had a dream about a key, a key that was hid in his truck. I woke up, went straight to his truck, opened the sunvisior and it fell right into my hand "the key to his P.O. box." He was also gettin playboys..etc in that box. He had a whole separate life. Betrayal hurts very badly, men can be so stupid sometimes, and cold hearted it seems. Did I leave him? well, no.. we have been divorced almost 2 times now, I wasn't sure if I was making the right choice or not. At the time I had a 3 year old girl who loved her daddy very much. Now I have a 7 year old and a 3 year old girl, I got pregnant months after that happen. We are happy now, things seem smooth, will he betray me again? Yep, I about know he will, he has done it many, many times before. However, he has never cheated on me "I do know this." If he ever does, he will be out the door quicker than he can say "it's not what you think!" I handle the betrayal in a bad way. Usually ends up with me cussing him, degrading him, and physically hurting him. Which I regret, I just have a bad temper. I love him and don't want to be without him, and he now knows that I WILL NOT stand for his crap. All I am saying is, do what your heart tells you to do. Wait and ask him about it and see what his response is. Keep us posted on how you are doing. Good luck! |
Date: 2/13/2003 7:34:00 AM
From Authorid: 61847
You should really confront him, because he needs to know you know. If you keep it from him then you aren't doing your job. Its just like that. Talk to him. Maybe you move back to Colorado, call up your family, talk to your friends and say that you are very sorry. Tell them what he did behind your back and ask them to forgive you. There is nothing wrong with asking to be friends again. AngelGurl4ever |
Date: 2/13/2003 7:40:00 AM
From Authorid: 58611
Well, you definatley need to confront him about this...it could be just him talking trash on the computer and nothing serious at all...you know how guys try to look BIG in front of thier friends...keep your cool here hon, you need to try and stay as stable as you can. I would look for more hard evidence, absolute proof...that way he can't back out of it...try a private investigator or go to Radio Shack and get a tap for your phone..wait a few weeks and see what comes up...But if he is cheating, dump him! Dont reward him for being a dummy and stay with him, no amout of cussing will ever change that kind of behavior! |
Date: 2/13/2003 7:48:00 AM
From Authorid: 58611
What are you going to do if you find out that he is or has cheated on you? |
Date: 2/13/2003 10:31:00 AM
From Authorid: 60685
I know you must be hurt, the guy is obviously an ass, if he has any stuff of his in your apartment throw it all out in the hall, he doesn't deserve as much as even putting the stuff in a box, if he has a copy of the key and does return it after you confront him, I would still change the locks or even better, change the lock and just throw his stuff away afterwards. If you feel like you can't bear seeing him and will get a panic attack wait till he calls after you throw his stuff away(that's if he even dares) and break up with him over the phone. I'm not really into breaking up with someone over the phone but guys do it all the time so why not have a girl do it once. And guys, don't be offended, I do know that some girls break up over the phone but it's mostly guys. |
Date: 2/13/2003 11:15:00 AM
From Authorid: 40145
get him out of your life, and find a better man. you dont deserve this crap from him honey. if you need to talk to someone, you could msg me or something, we can talk about it because i have been there before. |
Date: 2/13/2003 12:58:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 11348
Thanks everyone for your replies. The truth is, up until this I thought he was practically an angel... flawless I thought... I trusted him with my life. But now I've talked to him and he knows how hurt I am... somehow he denies everything. I don't have anywhere else to go... and I didn't have the heart to kick him out because I do love him so much even though. I think that maybe he might have been just trying to talk big in front of his friends... but the things he said hurt so bad. I don't think I'll ever be able to trust him again, at least not for a long time... but I'm giving him another chance. Thanks for all the comments everyone... I appreciate it. |