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Proud to be british? lol

  Author:  56287  Category:(Humor) Created:(9/13/2002 2:47:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (902 times)

PROUD TO BE BRITISH!!!!???

Very proud to be British because... Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke

Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink. NOT TO MENTION... 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate. British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.

101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars.

And finally......... In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.

Still proud???

By the way.... I'm British!

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Halloween is Right around the corner.. .







 
Replies:      
Date: 9/13/2002 3:18:00 PM  From Authorid: 25481    I meant **:P  
Date: 9/13/2002 3:18:00 PM  From Authorid: 25481    Are you saying british people are stupid? LoL. Orlando Bloom is british. LMAO! So is Graham Norton and other people...LoL...Im sure americans do things just as stupid. LOL. this was funny though. :\  
Date: 9/13/2002 3:30:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 56287    nope thats not what i'm saying its just some information i found on a site. Did you not see the end i'm british!  
Date: 9/13/2002 5:56:00 PM  From Authorid: 59940    Dude this is why im american,but if you know the Only in america jokes,post 'em!!I LOVE 'EM!!
Fayes Eyes
  
Date: 12/6/2005 2:11:00 AM  From Authorid: 39370    As awful as the injuries are....LOL!  

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