i sat there for a moment thinking about where that girl might have went. maybe she was part of me, and she didnt want to drive me away like i have felt. i wanted to know people like me, but i was afraid to ask just where these people were. i contiued to stay in the back of the room, and acted like nothing was wrong, but some started to notice that i didnt care. i thought i began to go crazy, but i guess i wasnt. i was just leaving things alone, and becoming two different people.
there were things that i wanted to say to the people that met a little to me, but i didnt know just how i'd say it. i thought about that often, but never got the courage up. i contiued to cut myself, i guess the numbing part of it felt so real, and good. the blood didnt bother me, but that didnt really matter. sometimes i would leave blood, so someone would find it. but when they did find it, they thought I'd started my period. i mean i could hang myself, and they'd probably carry me to my bed, and think i was taking a nap.
maybe i should just get up and leave, but if i leave then i'd have no place to go, and just maybe the pain would go away. i doubtly doubt that. i stood in the rain once thinking that it was blood. some days i got to the point where i saw only happiness, and it made me cut deeper. sometimes my parents would ask me if everything was good. of course i would always lie to them.
just sometimes, i'd wish i went all the way....
Spiritsof the Dead
Part 2 soon
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