Date: 8/26/2002 12:12:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
personally, i think that if they have someone who lives with them to help than yes, but if it is just the parent and the child, than NO.  |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:12:00 PM
From Authorid: 44342
Thats mean.You are very rude! Yes they should be able to have children!!!!!!!!  |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:13:00 PM
From Authorid: 12103
Well if they are married or have a gf/bf thing and someone to help raise the child, then yeah, i agree with you.  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:13:00 PM
From Authorid: 12103
I dont think your rude alaxanders momma |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:14:00 PM
From Authorid: 55297
if they have the mental capabilities about a 10 yr old they should. and they could also have someone to care for the kids too. like help them. no one should be deprived of having kids to love. ~~*heaven*~~  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:14:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
Excuse me, no i am not rude, I am the sister of a 16 year old mentally retarded young lady, wh ocan barely take care of herself, much less a child, and some of the people she goes to the day center with, who are mildly retarded have children, and NO like i said I am not rude, i am asking a question! |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:15:00 PM
From Authorid: 38278
I agree with you and Princess Jen.  |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 58078
I think they should be able to. They could have perfectly normal children. Same as midgets having children they could have children that are not midgets. So to answer your question yes...they are people to and have feelings just liek you and I. *IP*  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:16:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
Also think about someone who has the mental ability of a ten year old, what happens when thier child becomes smarter than them ? Does the child then go on to raise the parent? Is it fair to the child! |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:16:00 PM
From Authorid: 12103
This is though a really touchy subject...Personally i dont know how someone can take care of anothers life, if they cant take care of their own..that just dont go for mentally challenged people, but that goes for like maybe 13, 14 year old mothers... |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:18:00 PM
From Authorid: 38192
Hmmm, I dont know... If there is someone that can help out with them, then sure thang... But if not, they really shouldnt, because if they cant take care of themselves then how are they going to supposrt a baby.  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:19:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
Princess. I stand by what I said, if they have someone to help them fine.... but if it is just the parent and child, and the parent is not mentally able to make choices such as how hot should the water be to give a bath, ect ... than no! I know it sounds cold hearted, but im thinking about the child! |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 44342
okay then,dude,i had mentally retardded friends, and no one cares about them.my friends have peopel like that in their family. so dont cheeze off wiht me |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 61811
as long as they have someone else to help, yes, if not, well, it would be really hard for both of them. the mom/dad not as smart as their child and the child would feel like he/she should act like they didnt know a word or something. jackie  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:20:00 PM
From Authorid: 58078
Your right...that is true. They would need help but I do think they should be able to have children as long as they have that help. Good post. *IP* |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:21:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
people are too worried about the person with the disability - im worried about the child. My sister has a form of mild retardation, and I have a 2 year old. I have to watch her very close around him because she doesnt understand that he cant sit on the top of the counter, and that he cant go outside by himself, and that he MUSt have floaties on to get in the pool...... |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:22:00 PM
From Authorid: 25828
No, they should not be able to reproduce.  |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
Yes they should, because with whatever condition they have, they still try to lead a normal life just like the rest of us. Personally, i don't think this is something to bring up. Why don't you ask someone with down syndrom what they think. 2 people provide for a child, whether or not they're mentally handicapped. Plus, they will learn something from the responsibility. ~*Dangerously Tempted*~  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:24:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
Now let me say - if my sister was to become pregnant some how, which I dont think she even knows how, but i could be wrong, I would stand by her 100 percent and let her move in with me, or whatever I would have to do to make sure the baby and her are safe....... BUT..... I think that if she had no one, that she could really injure the child. |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:26:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
57158 this is a very important topic to me, do you have a child? |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 42792
I have a pretty long reply for this one. I have to get on a conference call but will come back afterward to reply.  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:29:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
dangerously, so you are willing to put a child in the hands of someone who can not take care of themselves? You are willing to let them make mistakes such as perhaps burning the child with bathwaterr, or perhaps getting side tracked while the child is playing, and it runs out in the road. It is hard enough for mentally able people to raise children. Do not jump down my throat and say we shouldnt talk about this, what is the difference in talking about this, and talking about abortion, homosexuality, gays having children... Wake up this is reality! |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:29:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
i'm only 15. But all i was going toward was the fact EVERYONE should be treated equally no matter who they are or what they suffer from. EVERYONE should be able to lead a normal life, down syndrom or not. ~*Dangerously Tempted*~ |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:31:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
have you ever been around anyone who is mentally retarded??????? They dont lead normal lives. Sure they get jobs, and no doubt they know how to love, and most of them are the nicest most loveable people in the world, it doesnt mean that they arent handi capped, they are, and they need guidance at times. And your right you are only 15 , perhaps I should talk so harsh to you - Im sorry - but like I said it is hard enough for people with high iq's to raise children! |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:31:00 PM
From Authorid: 25183
I think it depends, of course, on the severity of their retardation. I don't know much about Down's Syndrome, but if they are unable to care for a child, then no they should not have children. I'm with you A.M. it would be unfair to the child.  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:32:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
I meant shouldnt tlak so harsh to you! sorry! |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:35:00 PM
From Authorid: 25183
Also, for those commenting on this that do not have children, do you understand how much is involved in raising a child?? It is tough work, not all fun and games. A parent has to be responsible at ALL times for the welfare of their child. I do not think that it is wrong to admit that there are limits to what people with mental retardation can do. |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:36:00 PM
From Authorid: 23886
hmmmm..I never thought of that, Maybe they can have a relative raise the child and the mother can see her child like...sometimes...  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:38:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
yea actually i'm friends with some people mentally handicapped. They struggle, but they STILL TRY to lead a life like you or i do. Maybe they aren't capable of some things, but they still try. Try putting yourself in their position, A LOT of them want to be like us. They want to be able to play sports, date, hang out with friends, everything. But their limited because of this condition and a lot of them still try and use all their strength to be normal. And bless their heart for that! ~*Dangerously Tempted*~ |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:40:00 PM
From Authorid: 30051
Yes! if they have a bit of help..I am Sam!!!!  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:41:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
And you don't have to have children in order to see what it takes to raise one. ~*Dangerously Tempted*~ |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:42:00 PM
From Authorid: 25183
D.T., do you KNOW what it is like? |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:43:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
Also having a child and raising them is only as hard as you make it. ~*Dangerously Tempted*~ |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:44:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
yea i do. Being an aunt, and being around a child as much as i am, you begin to understand the things involved. ~*Dangerously Tempted*~ |
Date: 8/26/2002 12:45:00 PM
From Authorid: 40530
As long as they have help, then I think they should be allowed. Why spoilt the gift of a child? And I don't think you are rude. This is a perfectly good disscussion, and you didn't say you disagreed  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:47:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
DT . I am 22 years old, like I said I was raised with my mentally ill sister, and I have a son of my own, and unless you have been there and had that child you DONT KNOW. SORRY! But unless you stay up at night worrying wether or not you have to take that child to the emergency room you dont know. It seems like you are at that age that you think you know it all, but reality is you wont know until it is YOUR CHILD... and congrats on having friends with a disability - but just because they try to suceed in certain things does not mean they are sucessful! |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:50:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
the comment you made having and raising a chid is only as hard as you make it made me laugh - what a dream! Come on.......... no matter what YOU AS A PARENT DO ... your child will get sick, your child will have accidents, your child will do things to make you angry, and you have to know in a split second how to handle different situations. Being an aunt isnt enough to know, wait until it is you -perhaps then you will see what hard work it takes to raise a child now days! |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:51:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
you arent even old enough to drive, much less be able to know what it is like to be a parent. I hope you dont have to find out for a long time! But when you are a parent, then think about this question I have asked....... |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:54:00 PM
From Authorid: 25183
Oh, Alexander's Momma, you took the words right out of my mouth. D.T. being a mother and being an aunt are completely different. |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:56:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
Doodle, thats the problem , thats why kids think they can have babies, and they want babies, cause they think it is so easy...... man I think all teenagers should have to take care of a newborn for a weekend before they consider having children, they would sure change thier minds! |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:57:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
Man I hope I wasnt that sure of everything when I was a kid.... lol |
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Date: 8/26/2002 12:59:00 PM
From Authorid: 25183
I totally agree. Mine is four, and the light of my life, but it IS a lot of work to raise a child. Both physically and mentally. |
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Date: 8/26/2002 1:00:00 PM
From Authorid: 25183
Great post, by the way. |
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Date: 8/26/2002 1:01:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
Thanks doodle, it just kinda boogled the mind when people were saying we shouldnt talk about this, I truely dont see why not, and how it is any different than talking about wether or not homosexuals should have children ....... people get offended way to quickly, and me, myself is related to someone mentally ill, so I should have the right to discuss this....... THanks for all your post.... |
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Date: 8/26/2002 1:06:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
I NEVER said that i knew EVERYTHING it took to have a child. I know a majority of the main things. You're right i won't know, until i experience it for myself. I never said i was an expert, i never said i knew everything there was to know. And before you judge on whether or not i know the skills, put yourself IN MY POSITION, so i'm an aunt.. i deal with a lot more things than what most aunts or uncles do.. and no matter what i say, you're not going to understand because you have the fact "DT doesn't know what it takes" stuck in your head to realize i do a lot more than you think. What i meant by "parenting is only as hard as you make it" is if you want to make having a child a huge hassle, or taking the childhood one step at a time and enjoying each moment you get. It's your choice on how you wanna handle it.. and how you want to step into the responsibility and solve the problems. I never said having a child and raising them was easy, but it depends on how you approach it. Plus, raising a child takes 2 people. One to discipline and one to bend the rules with them. But it takes 3 or more people to let you get the type of experience that's unforgettable. ~*Dangerously Tempted*~ |
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Date: 8/26/2002 1:11:00 PM
From Authorid: 57158
I also never said that with what i know i could put it to the test and raise a child right now. I know the risks and such involved. And with what i know, i still have a lot more to learn. ~*Dangerously Tempted*~ |
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Date: 8/26/2002 1:14:00 PM
From Authorid: 25183
I agree A.M. I am not saying that EVERYONE with mental retardation should not have children, but I think that there are cases where they should NOT have children. |
Date: 8/26/2002 1:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 8184
I agree with PJ.  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 1:25:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
DT .... fine I see what your saying- but like isaid you will never understand until you have a child of your own. It is nice you are a good aunt, take time to learn everything you can about children before you have one. |
Date: 8/26/2002 1:25:00 PM
From Authorid: 48771
I think they should be able to have children if they can take care of them Jessica
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Date: 8/26/2002 1:43:00 PM
From Authorid: 42792
okay...where to begin??? My mother dedicated her entire life to working with the mentally retarded. In doing this, she often brought her clients home with her. I have been around mentally retarded persons my whole life. I even helped my mother design an independent living plan for the mentally retarded. So do I think they should be allowed to have children? Legally, they have rights as humans the same as any other human. If they wish to procreate there is nothing that one can do to stop them. Morally...whew, morally...If one can not understand morals then that would in essence make it morally wrong to do something, right? Moving on...there are different degrees of mental retardation. Someone who is borderline mentally retarded could most likely, effectively raise a child, providing a stable home and love however, would they be able to provide an enviroment to nurture the child's mental development? Probably not. Many of you may say that it is okay if the person has supervision or aid in raising their child. Honestly, can that be considered raising a child or is it truly leaving the task to someone else? Next point...mental retardation is genetic, of course. Is it really okay to reproduce with the chances of having a retarded child much higher than normal? I don't think so. A person of normal intelligence would most likely not want to procreate knowing that if they did they had a strong chance of having a retarded child. Why would anyone want their child to suffer in such a manner? If a retarded person wished to procreate knowing the chances then I would venture to say that because of their disability they are unable to comprehend the possible outcome therefore making them unfit to properly raise a child. Now, although, I do have these opinions, I do not believe that it is okay to castrate retarded males or give hysterectomies to retarded females. Confusing, I know. |
Date: 8/26/2002 2:19:00 PM
From Authorid: 56410
If they are capable of being parents, I think thats fine. As long as there is a parent without down syndrome to teach them what the other parent cannot. I see nothing wrong with that. But thats just what I think. -AerisVampire  |
Date: 8/26/2002 2:51:00 PM
From Authorid: 53052
i think if the person cannot care for themselves they should not be put in the situation where they have to care for a helpless child  |
Date: 8/26/2002 3:43:00 PM
From Authorid: 42464
If they are able to take care of the child then I say that it is okay.  |
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Date: 8/26/2002 4:22:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 46005
NKA .... I have so much respect for those people who work in the day centers, and homes. They are so caring, and most people dont realize half the people who work there are volunteering. It is amazing! The only thing is, is that they do take time to teach these specail people how to cook, manage money, clean up after themselves, ect, it doesnt always stick...... What most poeple dont know is that a very small percentage of mildly retarded people lead a normal life. It is very hard for them to get an apartment (because apartments are scard to rent to them, in fear they will do something to destroy the apartment... It is hard for them to get jobs that pay well, because they lack skills that would make them more than minuim wage. They do not drive, therefor thier means of transportation are limited. They do not lead long lives. Most people with downs live to be around 40 . LUCKY ones live longer. And a person who has down syndrom has a 50-50 chance of having a child with downs. Im not saying with the right guarenship that they could not be a loving parent, I am saying without the right guidence they could hurt or injure a child unintentionally. |
Date: 8/26/2002 10:09:00 PM
From Authorid: 42945
I think its the degree of retardation that should be the decision of how they could raise children, and if its not severe and with help I think they should be able to have children, I know of people who are not retarded and still cant raise their children the way they should be....cheers Zema  |
Date: 10/10/2004 3:45:00 AM
From Authorid: 35160
yes they should. they have the right to have kids. in fact they more rights than any one of us. i know this cause i work with people developmental disabilities, and we have a copy of all their rights in the house i work at.. but the fact of the matter is. most want to have as nomral a life as possible. and if they want to marry and have kids then im all for it. they deserve it as much as we do .  |
Date: 6/22/2005 11:53:00 AM
From Authorid: 23101
Jai Jai, this is a common question and Alexander's Momma is not being rude by asking it. It may seem rude, but it's life.. As for the answer to this, I really havent thought about it much.. I dunno! *hugs* -Ashley*  |
