I'm Growing Up,I'm Growing Strong & I Have To Move On~Forever Angel~

It's like my title says. It's all true. I might need alot of help during this process. But,I'm going to try it. I've been writing on here alot lately about my friend Dave. Well,last night I cried and cried. I thought alot about him. He's 30 and I'm 18. I have to make a big step and I'm scared to do it. But,I'm going to stop talking to him. I've had enough. He doesn't want to date me because he says he doesn't have the money. But,I'm going to see how long it takes him to finally realize I'm not talking to him. This means I will have to stop emailing him and calling him. It's going to be so hard for me. Everything reminds me of him. I know that everything around me is going to remind me of him and I'm going to miss him alot. But,if we're not going to have a future I just want to move on. It was really sweet that he compared me to Rose in Titanic. But,I just don't feel he meant it. I just think he's always trying to be sweet. I tell him he's sweet and I guess he thinks he is. But,he never emails me first. I think he just emails me back so I don't have to be upset. He says he'll call and he never does. And,he avoids me alot. So,right now I'm mad at the world and especially men. I'm sick of guys not liking me and just trying to be nice so they don't hurt my feelings. I thought and even told Dave he was different. But,he's not. So,I will just have to move on. From now on he has to come to me. Which I doubt will happen. It really sux thinking maybe it's true we're not meant to be. For awhile now I really believed he was the one. But,now maybe he's not. I truly believe there is no one out there for me. So,I'm moving on and I'm giving up on guys.

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