Date: 5/1/2002 8:10:00 PM
From Authorid: 52612
no it isnt normal, you know it sounds a lot like me too, anything that doesnt feel or sound right usually isnt right and i understand how you feel so if you want 2 talk i'm here..... < EVIL16)>  |
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Date: 5/1/2002 8:13:00 PM
From Authorid: 50490
No, this is not normal. He shouldn't be that mean. Sometimes parents can be over critical when they feel though that their children aren't living up to their fullest potential. Not saying that you arent, but my mom always did it to me. I could get the highest grade on a test, but it still could have been better in her eyes. |
Date: 5/1/2002 8:14:00 PM
From Authorid: 48128
Okay you are 16 just like me.  Well him hitting you is abuse but if it leaves no marks or anything it really is not abuse unless you can prove it! I really don't think it is normal for him to hit you. I use to be spanked when I was younger (I got spanked for doing wrong) but by the age of 7 my parents stopped I don't think a hand should be laid upon you. Oh and him shooting you hopes and dreams down is emotional abuse and it can really hurt ( I go through it with my brother he fills my head with things and I get upset at myself and it hurts) So to your quistion yes it is abuse but it is such a mild case. Sorry you must go through this! I know it's little things but lil things hurt 2!  |
Date: 5/1/2002 8:25:00 PM
From Authorid: 16069
Yes it is abuse! Your so used to it your beginning to think its normal. Im in the same situaton as you, only mines my husband. I feel worse for you because its your dad doing this to you. That has to hurt so bad! I wish I had some advice for you. I will pray for you. Good Luck sweety!  |
Date: 5/1/2002 8:33:00 PM
From Authorid: 42568
Actually, I'm going to counseling right now because I was abused. As for hitting you...my Psychologist told me that if he hits you on the behind or gives you a slap on the wrist, thats just discipline...anything else isn't acceptable. You'll probably need some kind of counseling in the future if you dont handle this and talk to someone about it. I've been there, times 3 so please feel free to message me. i dont bite  |
Date: 5/1/2002 8:34:00 PM
From Authorid: 14407
It dosen't matter if its normal or not, if it makes you uncomfortable its not right. The thing you must realize is that when someone treats somone else like your father treats you, its NOT your fault. Your father has his own emotional problems that hes not coping with. His anger is like a sickness thats causing him pain, and he dosen't know how to heal himself. Hes suffering so hes making you suffer too. This situation is the same the world over, and one I'm very familiar with personally. Its very natural for a teenager to be somewhat lazy, don't feel bad about it, I'm the same way. And never stop dreaming! The dreamers in this world are the ones that make a diffrence! But you should probably discuss how you feel with your father, and if it continues you should seek help from a professional. I hpoe everything works out and remeber, his anger is not about you!-Gandwere  |
Date: 5/1/2002 8:37:00 PM
From Authorid: 49543
it is even evident in the way you wrote this post that he has taken your self-esteem away. no parent should ever tell their kid that they can not do something that the kid dreams of. as far as the hitting goes, it would be ideal for parents to never hit their child but i remember a few times when my dad smacked my behind but looking back now, i know i needed it. sounds like to me, he is doing more emotional damage than physical. where is your mom?? can she help you? luv -MaceyHope  |
Date: 5/1/2002 9:20:00 PM
From Authorid: 47699
That is abuse anyway you look at it. It's both emotional and physical abuse and my opinion is the man needs help. As for how to get him to speak to someone about it, I'm clueless. I wish I could be of more help. Perhaps your guidance counselor could offer you some suggestions and/or possible solutions. I wish you well, my friend.  |
Date: 5/1/2002 9:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 16916
No, This is definatly not normal! Have you tried speaking with your mom about it? He has no right to hit you at all for one, and two he should support your NOT shoot you down. You need to talk to your mom or a school counsler or something..If you need to talk, please please dont hesitate to use my message box I am a very good listener and I have been told that I give great advice *Huge Chocolate Kissies*  |
Date: 5/1/2002 9:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 29534
It doesn't mean he hates you. And depending upon why he hits you, just cuz he wants to, or because you need it? And if he's hitting you hard enough to bruise or leave a mark? I believe that for instance, if a child does something to endanger themselves (running in front of a car, sticking things in a light socket), that's a reason to spank (not hit with fists). And a child should be spanked on the bottom. Now if your a teenager or young adolescent, no one has any business spanking, or hitting you. That's what grounding is for. I hope I have helped a lil bit. *hugs and love to ya*  |
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Date: 5/1/2002 10:07:00 PM
From Authorid: 29534
The emotional stuff is abuse. Don't get me wrong in my last response. I wasn't trying to attack you, I was trying to understand. I have been in the past a victim of abuse, and it does do damage-long-term damage. I mean at least the physical ones go away and fade, but the mental ones stay forever. And I'm sorry you have to go through this. *hugs and love to ya* |
Date: 5/2/2002 3:03:00 PM
From Authorid: 30786
No offence, but he sounds like a real jerk. Anyone who will even tell you that you won't amount to anything is obviously insecure and hoping to drag you down to their level. Keep your head up high, and remember that you are worth more than what he is implying  |
Date: 5/2/2002 5:39:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 52736
thank you all sooooooo much!! i'm glad that everyone on this site is soooo supportive...oh, about physical abuse....well he doesn't usually leave a mark or anything, but sometimes he'll push me down the stairs....or there was this one time that he smacked me across the face, and knocked my glasses off....and that left a mark, but nothing permenant....and there's other stuff...but those are the biggies....again, thank you all!! i love USM!! :-D much love **me**  |
Date: 5/2/2002 7:24:00 PM
From Authorid: 41067
You need to talk to someone in authority, this is most definatly abuse, and you should not have to put up with it.  |
Date: 5/3/2002 8:41:00 AM
From Authorid: 51009
First of all in this situation you will realy need your friends. They love you. Secondly if YOU dont think it is right then it isnt. Love~N~Hugz  |
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Date: 5/3/2002 9:57:00 AM
From Authorid: 29534
Then that is abuse knocking you down stairs and smacking you hard enough to knock your glasses off, and if you're a teenager he has not buisiness hitting you at all or spanking, that's what grounding is for...* hugs and love to ya* |
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Date: 5/3/2002 3:00:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 52736
thanx tandris leana and every1 else!!! i always have my friends, as was mentioned...and they really help much love always **me** |
Date: 5/3/2002 11:05:00 PM
From Authorid: 51070
Well...my grandma tells me I'm fat and I have a mustache (I DON'T!!!). I understand. You need to stand up for yourself, that's all. You're sixteen? In two years, you'll be an adult and you can move out. Just look at it that way. And if he's that bad, maybe report him to your guidance counselor or someone. Good luck.  |
Date: 5/6/2002 2:01:00 PM
From Authorid: 48531
I think that maybe , no i know that he should be more supportive of you. Are you doing things to make him mad! ??? Sometimes people dont reealize that what they say, like your father, cuts bone deap into our souls. Please, goto him and ask him if he knows how awful that he makes you feel! And start talking and communicating! Oswald  |
Date: 5/20/2002 2:25:00 PM
From Authorid: 51952
MEL! why didn't you ever tell me he was physical!? i mean i never knew and i can tell you that is going way WAY too far. even worse than before!> he has absolutley no right to hit you! i don't care what he says! he doesn't own you and i swear to God that if he does something like that again and i find out...........ARG! i can't believe him! i swear if i was just alittle bigg.....WHY DIDN'T YOU EVER TELL ME! DEAR GOD WILL YOU PLEASE TELL SOMEONE! for Gods sake he needs help if he is hurting you like that! heck he always needed it!i don't wanna sound rude but you are my friend and you would never let things like this happen to me so if things don't work out you can come live at my house! ok? love ya ! love Ecco  |
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Date: 5/21/2002 4:30:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 52736
thank you my dear ecco!! :-D ...and that's exactly why..i didn't want you to worry!!! if it does get really bad, i'll call you; make you feel better? much love always *melancholy_spirit13* |
Date: 9/26/2002 4:35:00 PM
From Authorid: 19927
i really like Franks comment! i think i'll have to agree with him...  |
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Date: 9/26/2002 5:14:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 52736
wow, what an old post! thanx for the reply though camaro chic **update** things aren't great now, but they are much better than they were. thanx to this super wonderful site for caring so much. i love you all!! peace love and tangerines |
