I need people that i can look up to!.....GrooveeMe93

My family has rarely ever lived comfortably for more than a few months. And as much as i try to convince myself otherwise it just won't happen! We have always lived in cheap apartments (no i take that back we lived in a cheap tiny house for about 2 years, i ended up developing asthma because it was really damp in there!) My mother gets all moody all the time when it comes to bills and blah blah blah. You knwo she is always telling ppl how hard she trying to provide well for us and how it just doesn't seem to be working.

WELL! Here's the whole situtation: first of all she works a job with semi-ok hours but doesn't pay crap for money! (Only like $7.50 an hour!) secondly she has goen to college 3 (YES THREE!!) times and isn't using ANY of those 3, she has one if food services (oh man that stroy irritates the heck outta me! all she needed to do was take a 1 quarter english class and she would have been a dietician!), another is as a chef, she has worked in some of LA's most pretigeous (sp?) restaraunts and even has even gotten recognition from Wolfgang Puck, and then her most rescent attempt at school is to go to school to be a teacher, which also in it's self is a LONG story but the up shot of it is that my grandma pulled out a 3rd mortgage on her house for my mom to go too school and she doesn't really have any intentions in going back to school for a while!

She has told me that the reason that she doesn't want to leave her current job b/c "where will you find a job where your boss kisses your feet?" OMG! If your not getting paid crap and working your butt off all the time IT'S NO WONDER HE'S ALWAYS KISSING YOUR FEET! She is working at a lumber yard selling paint! I really hate it that she always comes home soar and complaining about EVERY LITTLE THING! She has gotten offers from about 3 different restaraunts call in many different occasions in our area practically BEGGING her to work for them and each one she has either blown off or decided that 'she wouldn't have as much fun' I mean gosh its not anymore physically demanding you'll be on your feet all day no matter what you do! And i tell you what anything pays better then selling paint! One of the restaraunts was offering her 13.75 AN HOUR!!

I could go on and on abotu that but lets switch topics alittle. My mom is one of those ppl that if you told her that you were an secret agent by the end of the day EVERYBODY would know! She's really hard to trust! I really don't fell comfortable telling her a thing! She told a bunch of ppl at church about something that i had specifically said that i didn't want her to tell anybody about! It really drives me nuts! TWICE in ONE day i found out that she had told some ppl (the ppl directly related to it) about 2 different things that i asked her not to share with anybody!

I have come to the conclusion that my mom is a flake. Most kids say 'I wanna be like my mom or like my dad' But with me i don't (my dad is a completely different story). I really think that i need some good adult role models in my life. I think that i will really have to strive to make my life work out when i get older and it won't come as easy to me as is does to some ppl! And it's all because i don't have any great examples of adults who have good steady jobs and happy families...blah blah blah.

PEACE~*GrooveeMe93*~

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