Actual Medical Records of Doctors and Nurses, lol! ............. MonkeyLuvr

By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.

Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

On the second day the knee was better and on third day it had completely disappeared.

The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983.

Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.

I have suggested that he loosen his pants before standing, and then, when he stands with the help of his wife, they should fall to the floor. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

The patient will need disposition, and therefore we will get Dr. Blank to dispose of him.

Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

The patient has no past history of suicides.

Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.

The patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past 3 days.

She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in seperate directions early in December.

The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.

The patient was in his usual good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed.

Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you would like to work her up.

She is numb from her toes down.

While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

The skin was moist and dry.

Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.

Coming from Detroit, this man has no children.

Patient was alert and unresponsive.

When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

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