I received these in an e-mail, I have heard a few of these be4 but I thought these were worth posting. ~D1am0nd0416~
1. If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle. Take two and keep away from children.
2. it's very strange name they picked for "Social Security". For what they actually send you, you can't afford to be "social" nor can you really feel "secure."
3. Short skirts have a tendency to make men polite. HAve you ever seen a man get on the bus ahead of one?
4. it is hard to undersatnd how a cemetary raised its burial cost and blmaed it on the cost of living.
5. We are born naked,wet,hungry. Then things get worse.
6. the 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 cahnce of getting somthing right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
7. It is said that if you lone up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.
8. If the shoe fits, get anotehr one like it.
9. The things that come to those who wait may be the things left by those who got there first.
10. Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. teach a man to fish,and he will sit in a boat drinkiing beer all day.
11. When your swimming in a creel and an eel bites your cheek, that's a moray!
12. A fine is a tax for doing somthing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
13. the only cure for insomnia is more sleep.
14. Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
15. I wish the buck stopped here. I could use a few.
16. When you go to court you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people that weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. You can join Unsolved Mysteries and post your own mysteries or
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Halloween is Right around the corner.. .
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