These thought pierce my mind like a bee sting in the middle of a hot summer day.
They say that you should not think this way but I can’t make them leave my mind.
Thoughts of death still make me feel that is the only way to make this feeling go away.
What can make the pain stop?
Why do they continue to cloud my mind?
Why is my heart also telling me that this is the only way away from this pain?
Their poor drugs just numb me for a moment from this pain.
But the pain continues to grow.
Grow stronger with each passing moment
Each passing breathe
Each passing heart beat
But what is this pain?
How are you supposed to fix it if you don’t know what is hurting you like a paper cut that never heals.
When did I loose who I am
When did I stop being Beth and become just this blank face.
I close my eyes and see this blank face in a black robe amidst a crowd of friend’s, lovers and people smiling. I can feel this soul so sad, so in need of someone to love it and yearn for it.
Then I open my eyes and realize that that faceless person that lost soul is I.
A woman that used to be so happy and bubbly.
So full of life and love.
My eyes close again and I see that blank face and sadden soul slowly melts into the ground everyone just continues on chattering and singing their happy songs.
Did no one see this girl?
Why did no one try to help?
Not her best friend that always leans on her.
Not her husband that she pledged her life and love to.
Just a blank face and a saddened soul lost in this vast world.
TheGiggler
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