I Don't Have A Family Anymore ~Solitary Tear Of An Angel~

Christmas is time for forgiveness,
Or so I thought.

Ten months ago you turned your back on me,
Not something a family should do,
When someone has been hurt.

But you did.

It wasn't easy but I got through some hard times by myself.
No need for you to worry yourselves.

We passed in the street,
Not a word was said.

It was like we were strangers, not the close knit family we once were.

So yesterday,
I decided to attempt the unthinkable.

I called you,
You didn't even recognize my voice!

I wondered to myself why I was calling you,
After all you were the mistaken ones.

I asked a simple question,
Whether I could come to see you at Christmas,
To give my family their presents.

To much to ask I guess,
'You are no longer a part of this family' you said
'You don't deserve the happiness Christmas brings this year,
Or any year after'

The words tore straight to my heart,
And I found myself struggling to breath.

'You got what you deserved 10 months ago girlie' you said.

I hung up the phone, distraught by the words I had heard,
You had never before said them, until now.

I wonder if when you all sit around the Christmas tree,
Opening your presents,
Will you think of me?
Will you forgive yourselves for the way you treated me?
Will you miss me?

When I am at home alone on Christmas Day,
And family has come from miles away to spend the day with you,
Will you even notice I'm not there?

I was willing to forgive, not forget,
But I realise now
I don't have a family anymore.

I don't have a mother, a father, a sister,
I just have me.

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